Oxymoron
by divergentpanda46
Summary: Like most people, Uriah doesn't usually notice the Stiffs at school, but there is one girl that just seems... different. When he runs into Beatrice Prior as they both leave early after their aptitude tests don't go as planned, a friendship begins to form. When she chooses Dauntless... could it be more?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This is my first fanfiction, so I hope it doesn't disappoint.**

 **And of course, disclaimer: I do not own Divergent or its characters.**

 **Chapter 1**

I bounce on the balls of my feet nervously as I watch the train approach. I take a shaky breath in and let it out. As the train nears I begin to run, to match its speed, Marlene and Lynn steps behind me. I'm the first to reach the handle. I swing myself up and into the open train car, reaching out to help my friends on.

Marlene smiles, but, Lynn, being Lynn, of course, scowls and pushes my hand away. "I know how to jump onto a train, Uriah. I'm not some weak little girl."

I raise my hands, palms out, in surrender. "Guess I'm just feeling extra nice today—don't worry, I won't let that whole 'friendship' and 'being nice' thing happen again, Lynn," I assure her with a wink.

"So are you guys nervous for today?" Marlene's voice sounds a bit higher, more strained than usual. She's nervous, whether she'll admit it or not. I don't blame her. I am too.

"I guess, a little, but I can't see myself leaving Dauntless no matter what the test says," I admit. "You won't get rid of me that easy, Mar." She playfully punches my shoulder and I grin.

My friends and I, and the other Dauntless-born in the train car, are 16 years old. We're on our way to our last day of upper levels; this afternoon, our school careers will be behind us. Tomorrow, we will be initiates. But first, we must take the aptitude test. It will tell us which faction we fit into. We don't have to choose the faction the test suggests at the choosing ceremony tomorrow, but we only get to choose once and that's it. This decision determines the rest of our lives. There's no taking it back.

"We're all Dauntless to the core. There's nothing to worry about," says Lynn confidently.

I shrug before making my way to the open door of the train car, grabbing both handles and leaning out into the wind, watching the city go by. I close my eyes and smile into the wind. When I open them I see the city center approaching. "Just about time to jump!" I call out over the wind.

The train doesn't slow down for us; we just jump. A few seconds of total weightlessness, which still makes my stomach jump into my throat even after thousands of times jumping off moving trains—I love that weightless feeling—and then the familiar abrupt jolt when my feet hit pavement. I don't fall; I haven't messed up a landing in years. We Dauntless value bravery above all else, and as a result, we tend to be adrenaline junkies. I wonder what it's like to grow up in another faction, always playing it safe? No crazy games, or jumping off moving trains, or zip lining. Sounds pretty boring, if you ask me. Still, I'm sure that there would be things to love in any of the five factions.

I throw my arm around Marlene's shoulders as we saunter confidently toward the upper levels building. I smile as I gaze at the school building—I can hardly believe this phase of my life is almost over. I feel too young to choose the rest of my life, but too old to be a kid any more. It's a weird sort of limbo. As my eyes scan the windows, I see a grey-clad girl with her blond hair pulled into Abnegation's typical bun, watching us through the windows. Beatrice Prior.

This isn't the first time I've noticed Beatrice watching us Dauntless-borns. Occasionally I've seen her looking out the window at us as we arrive, like today. But I've also noticed her watch us climbing the big metal sculpture outside the school, and once, when a kid a year behind me fell and broke his leg while climbing said sculpture, Beatrice had been watching and was, of course—Stiffs are all about selflessness—the one to run to the nurse for help.

I don't usually notice Stiffs. That's kind of the point—their gray shapeless clothes, quiet demeanors, they are taught to be selfless and only focus on helping others. But I noticed Beatrice. Sometimes teachers seat us alphabetically, and with my last name being Pedrad and hers, Prior, sometimes that meant that she sat next to me in classes. Still I probably wouldn't have noticed her, if she were just any other Stiff. But she isn't. Stiffs are easy to ask for help, because, well, that's what they do. So more than once I've asked for her notes after I've cut class, or to borrow a pencil when I, being me, forgot to put one in my bag. Anyway, sitting by her in class, it didn't take me long to notice her eyes. They are large and round, and an icy grayish blue—almost stormy looking. It's not so much their shape or color, though. There's just something in them… something behind them. A curiosity and… excitement, maybe?... totally uncharacteristic of Abnegation. So, I don't think much about her, but I do notice her sometimes.

I split off from Mar and Lynn in the hallway and as I round a corner, see a big Candor kid intentionally barrel into none other than the girl I just saw in the window: Beatrice. He makes some rude comment about her being a Stiff (that's slang for Abnegation because they're so uptight) and leaves her to pick up all her books without any help. Most people don't like Stiffs much. They seem alright to me, though.

I stop and bend down to help her pick her books up and we stand up, facing each other. My hand brushes against hers as I stack the books on top of the ones she's picked up and she blushes. "Thank you," she nearly whispers.

I smile. "You're welcome, Beatrice. Good luck today."

As continue on toward my math class, I feel her watching me, but I don't look back.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: I forgot to do this before publishing the first chapter. This is my first fanfiction and honestly, the first thing I've written in a very long time, so I hope you enjoy it! Also, I forgot the disclaimer in chapter 1, and tried to edit it but it doesn't show up, so… oops. But, I do not own divergent or its characters.**

Chapter 2

"Your result was inconclusive."

 _Uh… WHAT?!_ "What do you mean… inconclusive?"

The Stiff who administered my test—I don't remember what she said her name was—bends closer to my ear and speaks so softly, she's almost whispering. "It means you have an aptitude for more than one faction. The test was only able to rule out 3 factions. You have equal aptitude for both Dauntless and Amity."

 _Dauntless and AMITY?! You've got to be kidding me. That pretty much makes me a walking, talking oxymoron._

Stiff Lady continues, "I imagine you were aware that you were in a simulation?" I nod. "There's a name for what you are—people with more than one aptitude, who are aware during simulations, they're called…" she looks over her shoulder and whispers. "…divergent. Now listen very carefully…" My stomach is twisting in knots. She seems so tense and serious. "It's very dangerous, especially in Dauntless. You must tell no one, not even your family, what your result was. Ever. It's dangerous."

She stands up and walks toward the back door. "For now, you should go straight home and think about what you want to do tomorrow. I'll manually input your result as Dauntless. Tell your parents that the serum made you sick and go straight home right now." Woah. She seems serious. Is that just a Stiff thing, or is this seriously THAT bad?

I nod slowly and leave through the back door she's holding open and make my way out to the street.

* * *

As I step out into the bright sunlight, I'm surprised to see a small girl in gray walking away 20 yards ahead of me. Beatrice is leaving early too. Huh… is she also 'sick'? I jog to catch up to her. "Yo, Beatrice! Wait up!"

She spins to face me, eyes wide. She looks shocked to see me approaching. "Uriah?"

"Yeah, hey, you leaving early too?" She nods. "Did you also get… _sick_?"

Beatrice freezes. Her stormy blue eyes study my chocolate brown ones, as if she's looking deep within me. I don't know why I am trusting her enough to even ask that, with how dangerous the Stiff Lady made it sound, but somehow I just know that I can. Finally, slowly, she nods.

She finally speaks. "You too, huh?"

I nod. "Wanna go somewhere and think about our choices together? I could use someone to talk to and I don't know who else to go to right now." I'll never see her again anyway, right? Chances are very slim that she and I would choose the same faction—we've only ever had one Stiff transfer in decades. And like I said… I just somehow know I can trust her.

Beatrice glances around, and I understand why. We're really not supposed to be 'fraternizing' between factions. But come on. It's our last day before we choose, we're done with school, they're really not gonna do anything about it, I figure.

Finally, she shrugs. "Sure. I don't have to be home for a few hours anyway." I smile, and then without thinking I grab her hand and begin to pull her along. My hand is almost tingling at the contact. I glance back at her and can't miss her blush. Oops… I forgot that Stiffs don't really hold hands until they're like… married. Weird. But, she didn't let go.

We stop next to the marsh and sit down on the grass. I look her over. She's very small, probably a whole foot shorter than me, and skinny, from what I can tell with those shapeless gray robes over her. Her hair is honey blond and probably long, but I've never seen it out of her Abnegation bun. Her nose is a little long but it suits her, and her eyes… well, I've mentioned her eyes before already. They're big and beautiful and a stormy blue, but it's the curiosity and determination I see in them that really pulls me in. She really is very pretty… it's just all hidden under Abnegation's plainness and that's a shame.

"So…" I begin. "I'll tell you about me first, then you have something on me and know you can trust me." I wink, and she laughs. "As I guess you know, I'm Uriah, Dauntless-born. I have a brother who stayed in Dauntless and my mom. My dad died when I was little. And apparently I have aptitudes for both Dauntless and Amity, of all things."

"Dauntless and _Amity_?!" she whisper-shouts. "You're a walking, talking oxymoron."

"I thought those _exact same_ words when the lady told me!" I laugh.

"So what do you think you want to do? Jump off trains and shoot guns and fight? Or strum a banjo and hug everyone a lot? I've noticed you've got the smiling all the time bit down that would fit right in with the Amity." She smirks, and I grin.

"I think I have enough adrenaline junkie Dauntless in me that I would get bored strumming banjos and hugging," I laugh. "We just have so much fun in Dauntless, and my family is there. My brother and I are pretty close." Beatrice nods. "How about you?"

Beatrice studies my face again for a moment, and sighs. "Abnegation, Erudite, and Dauntless."

I raise my eyebrows. "Wow, three? And I thought _I_ was a freak." I laugh and she hits my shoulder, but she can't hold back her grin. I can't imagine this girl being happy in Abnegation, being quiet and subdued and, well, likely very bored, for the rest of her life. "Well, you know what you'd be choosing with Abnegation. I don't know a lot about Erudite but they seem awfully serious, and you'd better really love to read. But I can tell you about Dauntless life if you want."

Her eyes brighten. "I'd love that! I've always been fascinated with the Dauntless-borns. I always wished I could run and climb and have fun."

I chuckle, "I could see it. And yeah, I've noticed you watching sometimes." She blushes. "Not me specifically," I say quickly, "just the stunts and stuff we all do." I hope she was watching _me_ , though. Wait, what? Why do I care if she noticed me?

"Well…" I start. "As you know, we get to jump on and off trains which is actually pretty fun. And we have a lot of fun, do pranks and dares and stuff. Initiation is tough, but I know you could do it. You may be small but I just know that you've got it in you." This girl blushes a lot. I lean closer to her. I'm not sure why. "I could help train you at night if you did choose Dauntless, so don't let initiation scare you off. Could probably get my brother to help, too."

She raises her eyebrows and looks shocked. "You'd do that? You'd train me? We don't even know each other, Uriah. Not really."

"So? Amity, remember? I'm just that nice!" She laughs. "Seriously, though, I'd help you. Man, I wish I'd known to bring you some Dauntless cake! Then you'd be _sure_ to transfer to Dauntless. Besides, we've sat by each other in school enough years and you've saved my lazy ass with your notes and pencils enough time, even though you didn't really know me, I think you've earned it."

She laughs. She has a nice laugh. "Can you really see someone named _Beatrice_ at _Dauntless_ , of all factions, Uriah?"

"You don't have to keep that name if you want to be someone new. Maybe we can make up a nickname for you." I say her name slowly a few times. "I don't think Bea is right"—she wrinkles her nose and shakes her head—"but how about Tris? It sounds badass!"

"Badass, huh?" Beatrice grins. I can't help but laugh hearing a word like 'badass' rolling off her lips. "I like it. Tris. If I come to Dauntless, I will be Tris. Thank you, Uriah."

I nod. "Are you considering Erudite?"

I breathe a sigh of relief when she shakes her head, though I'm not sure why it matters to me. "No, I ruled that one out right away. It's Dauntless or Abnegation. I just feel so bad about the idea of leaving my family. But I don't think I'm good enough for Abnegation, either. I'm not selfless enough."

"I doubt that's true. You've always seemed genuinely kind and selfless to me," I reassure her.

"My brother Caleb, he's always scolding me. It's easy for him. But it just doesn't come naturally to me." She looks at her watch. "I'd better go or I'll be late getting home."

I stand and reach out to help her up. My hand tingles again as she takes it. "Thanks for talking with me, Tris. It's nice to know someone else is like me. I hope we get to ride the train together tomorrow." I wink as I turn and walk toward the train tracks.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I don't own Divergent or its characters.**

Chapter 3

I arrive at the Hub with mom and Zeke about 20 minutes before the Choosing Ceremony is to start. It takes a while for our turn on the elevator to the twentieth floor because there are so many people. The longer I wait, the more I have to wipe my palms on my black pants, and the harder it is to put my signature smile onto my face. I need some cake. Dauntless cake makes the world right. Yep, I definitely won't be going to Amity, if my family wasn't enough to keep me at Dauntless, well, there's the cake.

"You okay, bro?" Zeke looks worried as we finally enter the elevator.

I try to smile. "Sorry to tell you, you're not getting rid of me that easy," just like I told Mar yesterday on the train. "I ain't no pansycake, I can't become a banjo-strumming hippie or something." Zeke looks reassured as he chuckles.

I give Mom and Zeke hugs and exchange I love yous before taking my place among the other 16 year olds. They'll call us in reverse alphabetical order; I'm between an Erudite boy in blue, Jason Patrick, and an Amity girl on my right named Danielle. On the other side of Danielle are the Priors—Beatrice, then her brother Caleb. I'm not sure if they're twins or just really close in age. I lean behind Danielle and touch Beatrice's arm. She looks surprised as she steps back a bit and leans toward me. Why's she always so surprised that someone would talk to her? She's pretty and nice to talk to.

"Good luck, Tris. Choose well," I say to her with a smile. She nods and smiles, but her smile doesn't reach her eyes. Honestly, she looks terrified. She turns back to her brother. I tap her again and she leans back toward me. I just feel like I need to say this to her, like she needs to hear it. "Tris. You're gonna do great no matter where you are. But just remember, you are the one who has to live the rest of your life wherever it is you choose today. Make the choice for you, not for anyone else."

Tris bites her lower lip, finally gives a small nod, then says, "Thanks, Uriah. You too."

We don't have time to feel awkward about the interaction, because Marcus, Abnegation's leader, takes the podium between the Erudite and Dauntless and begins to speak. "Welcome," he says. "Welcome to the Choosing Ceremony. Welcome to the day we honor the democratic philosophy of our ancestors, which tells us that every man has the right to choose his own way in the world."

Do we really? The options we can choose between are narrow. We only have five choices, and once we do, conformity is important. I can choose to be selfless in Abnegation, honest in Candor, kind in Amity, brave in Dauntless, or smart in Erudite. But choose anything but Dauntless and I give up my family forever.

"Our dependents are now sixteen. They stand on the precipice of adulthood, and it is now up to them to decide what kind of people they will be."

That's another thing. Why does only _one_ quality have to be good? I may choose to value bravery and be a part of the warrior faction, but why should that mean that I don't also value being kind? Can't I be brave _and_ kind? And why not selfless, smart and honest for that matter, too?

Marcus rambles on, and I try to stop philosophizing. It doesn't matter that I want to value more than just bravery, this is how it is. Five factions, each with different purposes, working together to complement each other. It would just be nice if everyone could see the good the others do. Like yesterday when that Candor pushed Tris down in the hallway. Erudite has been releasing articles against Abnegation because Abnegation controls the government. I see their point about the other factions having more of a say in things, but people shouldn't be pushing little girls down and calling them names to get there. Not like Tris did anything. If I hadn't stopped to help her pick up her books, I'm sure no one would have, unless another Stiff came along. Everyone else would have just ignored her. Guess I really _do_ have an aptitude for Amity.

I snap out of my thoughts as I realize Marcus has begun to call kids forward to the choosing bowls. In fact, I didn't even notice the first dozen or so names that were called, and the clear water from Erudite's bowl is already tinged pink. "James Tucker," Marcus calls. James is a Dauntless-born, like me. We're not particularly friends, but we get along fine. James stumbles a bit on his way to the bowls and stands there surrounded by the five choosing bowls— Dauntless coals, Abnegation stones, Candor glass, Erudite water and Amity soil—and hesitantly takes the blade from Marcus. He cuts his hand and holds his fist closed as he looks between the Candor glass and the Dauntless flames. He holds his arm out and lets his blood fall onto the glass. "Candor," Marcus announces.

One of ours has transferred. I hear unhappy muttering from my faction's section, but good for James, if that's where he will be happy. People might see him as a traitor… I think that's ridiculous. They tell us to choose what we value, where we fit, but it's like they mean for us to only choose it if it fits what _they_ see for us.

I watch more kids choose to stay in the factions they grew up in. As the line ahead of me dwindles, Marcus calls Tris's brother. "Caleb Prior." Caleb looks over his shoulder at Tris on his way to the bowls, then takes the blade, cuts his hand, and lets his blood fall into the Erudite water.

 _Shit._ Tris might think she isn't selfless enough, but I'm fairly certain she is. She might stay in Abnegation, unhappy for the rest of her life, just to keep her parents from losing both their kids in the same day.

Before Marcus can call her I lean back and tap her shoulder once more. She looks at me, stunned and confused. "Tris, _you_ have to live with your choice," I whisper.

She looks away as Marcus says, "Beatrice Prior." She glances back at me as she begins to walk toward the bowls, a determination in her eyes that wasn't there a moment ago. I grin and cross my fingers.

Tris approaches the bowls, takes the knife and cuts her palm. She stands there for a while, it feels like forever, though it's probably only 5 or 10 seconds. Then suddenly, she thrusts her hand out and I hear a sizzle as her blood hits the burning Dauntless coals. I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding, and I feel lighter… which is odd since I still haven't made my choice and I'm about to in just a minute—Danielle, the Amity girl to my right, is on her way to the bowls now.

After Danielle chooses to stay at Amity, Marcus is calling me forward. "Uriah Pedrad." I feign confidence and grin and wave at my mom and Zeke on my way up there. I take a deep breath, slice my palm just deep enough, and finally, once I hear the sizzle of the coals, I let my breath out and feel the anxious knot in my stomach melt away.

I take my place with the other new Dauntless initiates and immediately look for Tris. Mar and Lynn haven't chosen yet. "Tris!" I whisper, and she whips her head toward me and grins. "You'll love it at Dauntless," I whisper-shout. "Just stick by me, okay?"

Tris nods and smiles gratefully. "Thanks, Uri."

Gradually more transfers and Dauntless-born initiates join us; Mar and Lynn find their way to me as soon as they have chosen and I sling an arm over Mar's shoulder. We aren't together—she's cute and sweet, but we've been friends forever. The last kid chooses and we Dauntless begin to walk out of the exit. I take my arm off Mar's shoulder and grab Tris's hand so I don't lose her, just before the Dauntless all begin to run in a stampede down the stairs. I hear a transfer ask what we're doing and I smirk. "C'mon, Tris, stay by me," I call out as I pull her along, and we run toward our futures.


	4. Chapter 4

**Thanks all for the encouraging reviews! Again, I don't own anything, just my ideas.**

Chapter 4

"Listen up! My name is Max! I am one of the leaders of your new faction!"

Max is standing on the ledge of a big hole in front of us on a 7-story roof. So far we have passed the first two tests of initiation, and Tris has kept up with Lynn, Marlene and me. I gave her a hand up into the train after pulling her along behind me, holding her hand, as we ran to the platform. She really didn't even need my encouragement to jump off onto the 7 story roof we stand on now; she jumped holding hands with another transfer—a Candor girl who introduced herself as Christina—but I think that was more for Christina's benefit than Tris's own. I don't see Tris now; after seeing that she'd made it here, I went to help another Dauntless-born, Rita, away from the ledge after her sister didn't make it. I shudder as the image of Rita's sister, Amber, dead on the concrete 7 stories below us, limbs bent at unnatural angles, flashes back to my mind.

It might be that thought that makes me hesitate when Max asks for a volunteer to jump off the building into the compound. I know there's a net at the bottom. I know I won't be hurt. I try to gather my courage back up and stop being such a damn pansycake when I see someone step onto the ledge, and I'm kind of glad I hesitated when I see who it is: a small blond girl in gray. First jumper is a big deal, and Tris is at such a disadvantage coming from Abnegation, I'm glad she'll get that title instead of me, or another Dauntless-born, or that cocky Candor who I've already heard taunt her several times.

Tris takes off her jacket, balls it up and throws it at some asshole Candor transfer who's taunted her off and on since we got to the train. I laugh under my breath. There's that spirit I always see in her eyes. She looks down for a few seconds, bends her knees and jumps. She doesn't even scream.

"Damn, didn't expect that," Lynn mumbles.

I smirk. "I'm not surprised. It takes guts to leave Abnegation, of all places, for Dauntless." Tris's Candor friend, Christina, has just jumped and I hear her scream on the way down. I snap out of my… whatever this daze is, and head up to jump next.

It seems I'm not quite as brave as Tris—I scream on the way down, even though I know what awaits me. I bounce once off the net before it stills, and I roll out. Four and Lauren greet me and Four claps me the shoulder. "Welcome to Dauntless, Uriah," he says with a slight smile. Four is Zeke's best friend. He transferred here 2 years ago, so he was in Zeke's initiation class. He trains the transfers, Lauren trains us Dauntless-born.

Lynn tumbles out next, then Mar. They join me at the bottom of the platform and I not and smile at Tris before turning to my friends. "I can't believe we're finally initiates!" Marlene squeals.

"Yeah, now you pansycakes just gotta make it through the next 4 weeks," I tease, with a cocky grin. "We all know _I_ have nothing to worry about, though."

Marlene punches my shoulder and Lynn snorts. "I think you've got that a little backwards, pansycake," Lynn smirks.

"Hey! I'm not a pansycake!" I grin. "But I admit, Lynn, you do look pretty scary with that shaved head." That was definitely a shock this morning. But Lynn doesn't like to be patronized just because she's a girl, and thought shaving off her long hair would help keep guys from going easy on her in the fights.

"Yeah, and now no one can use long hair against me in stage one." Lynn runs her palm along the top of the slight stubble on top of her head.

"Your hair was soooo pretty though, Lynn," Marlene pouts.

"Well, at least you kept _your_ beautiful hair, Mar," I offer. Marlene blushes slightly. She's a very pretty girl, with curly light brown hair. She's not tall but not short, and she's slender but strong. I sling an arm over her shoulders, and she smiles as her emerald green eyes look up into my chocolate brown ones. The dark skin of my hands contrasts with the light skin of her shoulder.

Lauren and Four begin down the tunnel into the compound. All the initiates must have made it down to the net, I guess. It's dark, but growing up in Dauntless, I'm used to that. Most of the compound is under ground. Lauren and Four stop and the transfers, not used to the dark of the Dauntless compound yet, bump into each other like a big pile-up. I'm kind of glad that I didn't stick by Tris, now, or I'd be in the middle of it.

"This is where we divide," Lauren says. "The Dauntless-born initiates are with me. I assume _you_ don't need a tour of the place." As we follow Lauren to the dormitory, I hear Four start the tour for the transfers.

* * *

The chaos and excitement of Choosing Day means a packed dining hall. The transfers aren't here yet—probably still on their tour of the compound with Four. We've already picked our bunks in the Dauntless-born dormitory; I picked a bottom bunk, with Marlene and Lynn sharing the bunk bed next to me, Lynn taking the top bunk. Now that we've arrived for dinner, I try to pay attention to Lynn and Marlene's conversation, am distracted watching for the transfers to arrive to the dining hall.

We make our way to a table and sit down, Marlene at the end, me next to her, and Lynn across from us. There's a tray of burgers at the table, but I can't forget the most important part of _every_ Dauntless dinner: Dauntless cake. And on a night like tonight, it could be gone before I know it. I hurry across the hall to grab my slice, and think to grab an extra for Tris—I already told her she's gotta try it and I'm sure she won't think to grab some before it's gone.

When I arrive back at the table, Four has joined our table, a couple seats over from where I left my plate. A moment later, Tris cautiously sits down between me and Four, with Christina and a couple other transfers—both boys, Erudite and Candor—sit across from us, by Lynn.

"Tris!" I say eagerly. I push the cake toward her. "I got you this. We talked about the cake yesterday, remember? You definitely can't miss out on Dauntless cake your first night here."

"You really like your cake, don't you?" Tris frowns. "I've never had cake, actually. We didn't have things like that in Abnegation."

"Well, make sure I get to see you take your first bite, when you're ready for it, then," I chuckle. "I swear, your life will never be the same again."

Tris cautiously puts a hamburger on her plate and examines it. A few of us at the table notice and I can see that we're all confused… everyone except Four, apparently. "It's beef," he tells her, passing her a bowl of ketchup. "Put this on it."

"You've never had a hamburger before?" Christina asks with wide eyes.

"Stiffs eat plain food," Four says. That's right… I often forget that Four transferred from Abnegation. I don't think many people know that, but because he and Zeke are best friends, I know more about him than most. That doesn't say much though—I actually know very little. I don't even know his real name. He mostly keeps to himself, other than hanging out with Zeke and Shauna, but even with them, I don't think Four is exactly an open book.

"Why?" Christina asks.

Tris sounds like she's reciting from memory when she shrugs and answers, "Extravagance is considered self-indulgent and unnecessary."

Christina smirks. "No wonder you left."

Tris rolls her eyes. "Yeah. It was just because of the food."

Four almost manages to suppress his smile, and Lynn snorts. I laugh and lean toward her a little. "You made a good choice, then. Told you we had good food here."

Four and some of the transfers look puzzled at my familiarity with Tris, but we dodge potential questions as Zeke and Shauna plop down across the table from Four. Before I can begin to introduce them, the cafeteria doors open and the room hushes. Eric, our youngest—and cruelest—leader is entering the cafeteria… and is heading our way. Eric was in Four and Zeke's initiation class and he and Four hate each other. The only fight Eric lost was against Four, and Eric also ranked second to Four, and it seems he's never gotten over it. And yep… looks like Four is exactly who Eric is here to see. If I'd known this was coming, I'd have convinced the kitchen staff to make me popcorn.

"Aren't you going to introduce me?" Eric asks Four. As Four introduces Eric to the transfers, Eric is looking at Tris like she's a meal, and I can feel the tension radiating off of her. I don't like it one bit. "A Stiff?" Eric scoffs. "We'll see how long you last." Under the table, my hand involuntarily forms a fist, and I glare at Eric. The last thing she needs is to for Eric to have it out for her.

I think it's time to get the attention off the transfers. "Did you need something, Eric?" I ask. It works—he has tense conversation about our head leader, Max, wanting to see Four, to which Four refuses, as he still does not want the leadership job he's been refusing for the last two years. I'm not sure why he's so against leadership. He sure would have been a lot better than a sadist like Eric, and as the first ranked initiate their year, it was in Four's favor. He's pretty much a Dauntless prodigy.

Eric finally leaves. Someone calls Four's name and he gets up and leaves also. Tris nudges me with her elbow. "Ready for me to try this cake, Uriah?"

I bounce in my seat. "YES! Zeke! Tris here is about to try her first ever bite of cake!"

Zeke grins and he and I watch expectantly as she closes her mouth around the fork and her eyes widen. Finally she says, "You were right, I _would_ have transferred here just for the cake, Uri!"

Zeke and I laugh. I put my arm around Tris's shoulders. She tenses a bit, but relaxes after a moment. I know she's not used to casual touch, but I'm not afraid to push the limit a little bit—it'll help her fit in better here. Yep, I'm just helping her fit in. Right. At least that's what I tell myself. "So Tris, this is the less handsome Pedrad brother, my big brother Zeke. Zeke, this is Tris Prior, first jumper. We were sat together in school a lot. Oh and that's Shauna. Shauna is Zeke's girlfriend and Lynn's sister." Tris nods at them shyly.

"That's right," Shauna says, "I heard the first jumper this year was a Stiff. Impressive." Tris blushes. Her transfer friends leave the table and she starts to follow them, but I pull her back down, whispering her to wait a second.

"Zeke, my wonderful, generous big brother…" I start. He raises his eyebrows. "I told Tris I… well, _we…_ would help her get up to speed for stage one. Like how Four helped Shauna."

Zeke looks her over. "Yeah, I can see that it looks like you'll need some extra practice." She looks down. "I'm sure between Uri and I, we can help you get there. Sometimes I will have shifts in the control room and won't be able to help, then it'll have to just be Uriah, but I can help a few times."

We decide that Zeke will start working with her for a little while later tonight, and I'm relieved. I talked her into coming here, so I'd better make good on my promise to help her through stage 1. I can't let her become factionless. She's the only one who knows my secret. The only one I know who is like me.


	5. Chapter 5

**I own nothing. Divergent and its characters are property of Veronica Roth.**

Chapter 5

Dauntless initiation is no joke, and this morning we're being thrown right into it. The stunts yesterday were just stunts. Today, we begin the first stage of initiation, and I'm already starting on the wrong foot. As Marlene shakes me awake, I inwardly groan; celebrating the beginning of initiation last night by the chasm with Aaron, Eli and Gabe—a few Dauntless borns I occasionally hang out with when Zeke is busy and Mar and Lynn are just a little too girly for my mood. They're okay, but we're not really _friends_ … more just acquaintances. I really need to get some actual guy friends. Anyway, I'm not exactly known for a stellar track record when it comes to making wise, responsible decisions, and the little bit of responsibility I normally might show seems to nearly disappear around these guys.

A hangover is not the best way to start the _physical_ stage of Dauntless initiation. Not at all.

Lynn quickly loses patience with waiting on Mar to successfully shake me awake so they can grab breakfast together before training, so to make my morning even _better,_ I start my day with a bucket of cold water dumped on my head, courtesy of Lynn. "Hey, you pansycakes!" I shout, jumping out of bed. Lynn and Mar scurry quickly backward. "Was there no other way to wake me?!"

Marlene bursts out laughing. "Didn't seem so—I was shaking you for like ten minutes!"

Might as well find the silver lining. "Well… guess I can skip the shower for now then."

Lynn and Marlene disappear toward the dining hall while I get dressed. It's 7:45. I only have fifteen minutes to get to the training room. I guess I get to start stage one not only hung over, but on an empty stomach, too. This is going to suck.

I wish Christina and Tris good luck, hoping Tris doesn't notice the involuntary shiver that runs through me when I brush against her arm as I pass them on the way to the training room. The transfers will train in a different room, so we won't be training together. Zeke said their training last night went pretty well. I'm hoping Four will be looking out for her too, since they're the only two Abnegation transfers in the entire faction.

 _Focus, Uri, focus. You've gotta get through initiation too, so get your mind off the Stiff. Man, I wish I'd woken up in time for—_ My thought is interrupted by an answer to my prayers, in the form of Marlene holding out a chocolate chip muffin toward me. "Yes! You're the best, Mar!" I say with a mouth full of muffin.

Lynn has her usual bored tone and expression. "Not ready to lose you to the factionless yet, Uri, or at least Marlene wasn't. I think it could be a blessing—I'd never have to hear the word pansycake again."

I playfully hit her in the shoulder. "You know you'd miss Dauntless's best eye candy."

She pats the top of my head, like I'm a dog. "I can see why you like the Stiff." _What?!_ "I can just imagine it—her never talking about herself, you constantly bragging whether what you say is true or just an illusion created by your ego—everyone's happy." Marlene snickers; I scowl.

Lauren directs us to the punching bags and begins showing us punches and kicks, thankfully saving me from _that_ awkward conversation. I haven't entirely sorted out how I feel about Tris, but whatever is going on there, I didn't know it was so obvious.

Like most, if not all, the Dauntless-born initiates, my friends and I have grown up practicing fighting in the training rooms for fun. We've had plenty of practice at this. I've always been a good fighter; wrestling and fighting is a lot of what brothers as close as Zeke and I are do. Lauren moves throughout the room, correcting and giving tips to initiates. She stops behind me, watches for a moment, my punching bag swinging with the force of each punch and kick, then nods and moves on. I'm lucky that Lauren didn't throw us into fighting right away. Maybe today was the best day this week for a hangover after all.

I can hear target practice happening in the other training room when Lauren dismisses us for lunch, and stop at the door to peek in. I want to see how Tris is doing with shooting. She looks comfortable and natural with the firearm in her hands, and while there are scattered bullet holes all over the target, they're definitely concentrated on the inner circle and bullseye.

"Uri? You coming?" Marlene asks, right as Four starts calling out for the initiates to return the guns to him and go to lunch. I silently debate in my head for a moment whether to go with Lynn and Marlene now, or to wait for Tris. I guess if Marlene already noticed something about my… feelings… maybe I should play it cool and just meet Tris at the dining hall.

I haven't been eating long when Tris slides into the seat next to me. Al sits down on the other side of Tris, and Christina and Will sit across from them. Tris' eyes light up while she tells me about learning to shoot a gun and she just looks so alive and awake. I want to scoot closer, I want to keep staring at her beautiful face, but I have to stop myself before I start looking like a creep.

We have our turn at target practice in the afternoon. I'm a good shot already, thanks to years of paintball fights and practicing with pellet guns, so this really turned out to be an easy day after all.

I fall into step with Tris and Christina a moment after leaving the training room for the night.

"I'm surprised he didn't break you in half," Christina is saying to Tris. "He scares the hell out of me. It's that quiet voice he uses." Break Tris in half? What? Who?

Tris glances over her shoulder before she replies, "Yeah, he's… definitely intimidating."

I sling my arm casually over Tris' shoulders, though with how my heart rate is picking up, I feel anything but casual. "Who's intimidating? What happened?"

"It was nothing. Four helping me with training. He was reminding me to keep tension at my core, just like Zeke did last night, except Four put his hand on my stomach when he did." Oh yeah, Four. Yes, he's intimidating, there's no doubt about that. I don't know why he couldn't just tell her instead of touching her. Four isn't usually one to touch people if he doesn't need to.

"Four's okay. He's intimidating, yes, but he's a good guy. He's really good friends with my brother. He won't hurt you, at least not unless you give him a good reason to," I laugh. "Speaking of training, Zeke is working tonight, but I can spar with you a little tonight to get you ready for tomorrow, Tris."

"No fair!" Christina whines. "How'd you get the cute Dauntless-borns helping you, Tris?!"

"I didn't do anything!" Tris insists. "Uriah and I sat next to each other in almost every class throughout school. He offered! Besides, look at me. Without his help I might literally get killed in a fight before I even have a chance to fail initiation and be cast out to the factionless." Christina seems to consider this, then nods in approval.

"Nah, you're really just training with me so you can spend more time looking at my beautiful face," I tease.

Al turns toward us from where he's been walking a few yards ahead with Will. "I want to get a tattoo."

The tattoo parlor is one of my favorite places. You don't see much art around, but the tattoo parlor is covered in it. All kinds of pictures are all over the walls; it's like tattoos are Dauntless's version of art, something usually only found in Amity. The girls are shopping and will meet us here, so it's just me, Will and Al. Al's still deciding what to get, and Will and I don't want tattoos today.

Will breaks our awkward silence. "I like Christina. I have no idea how to…" he trails off and sighs. "You ever had a girlfriend?"

I shake my head. "I flirt a lot, but no, nothing serious anyway." I scratch the back of my neck nervously. I've always been a flirt, and I've had a few little nothing "relationships". I've never had trouble with girls, so I'm not sure why it's so hard to even admit my feelings for Tris to myself, let alone make a move. "Maybe it's just harder with a girl you really like. I've never been this nervous around a girl before, anyway…"

Will raises his eyebrows and I can feel the blood rushing to my cheeks. "Tris." It's a statement. I guess Will's noticed too.

"It's only the second day of initiation. I don't want to scare her. I mean, we sat by each other a lot in school, but I never knew her very well until just the last few days."

"Well," Will says quietly, "I think Al might like her too, so don't take too long." I eye Al warily. He's now in the tattoo chair and Bud has started drawing a spider on Al's arm.

"Noted," I tell Will. "Thanks, man. Though, really, who can compete with this beautiful face?" I'm such a cocky ass. Will just laughs.

Will and I turn toward the doorway when we hear Christina's bubbly chatter. My mouth falls open when I see Tris. She's in a black sleeveless dress that falls just above her knee—it's the first time I've seen her in something that fit well, as she's always been accustomed to the baggy Abnegation clothes. Her long blonde hair falls in waves over her shoulders, and something is different about her face, probably make-up. Anyway, whatever Christina did, Tris's eyes are more striking than ever.

Christina passes me on her way to stand by Will and whispers, "close your mouth, you'll catch flies." Oops.

As I sling my arm over Tris's shoulders, I lean down and whisper in her ear, "you look beautiful, Tris." She's red as a tomato as we start browsing the drawings. She's looking at a drawing of a black bird. "You gonna get one?"

She chews on her lip. It's so sexy when she does that. Now I can't stop staring at her lips… "Not sure yet. Maybe."

I start trying to think of some sort of dare or bet to get her to do it, but am interrupted by a voice from behind us: "It's a raven. Pretty, right?" Tris and I spin around; she pales slightly and grabs my hand. Tori smiles. "Well, hello there. Never thought I would see you again. Beatrice, is it? And Uriah, good to see you too."

"It's Tris, actually," Tris corrects her. "Do you work here?" I raise my eyebrows at Tris. How does she know Tori?

"I do. I just took a break to administer the tests. Most of the time I'm here. I recognize that name. You were the first jumper, weren't you?"

"Braver than me," I interject, and Tori laughs and congratulates her.

Tris glances at me with a look of uncertainty and holds my hand a little tighter, and the nervous-excited feeling in my stomach is getting stronger. "Listen, Tori—I need to talk to you about…" she glances toward Will and Christina. They're not paying attention but they could at any moment, and I think I know where this is going. "…something. Sometime." Yep. That makes perfect sense: Tori was the one that told Tris she was divergent, so she can answer our questions, tell us what this means and why it's dangerous.

Tori glances nervously between Tris and me. "I am not sure that would be wise." She's speaking so quietly I can hardly hear her. "I helped you as much as I could, and now you will have to go it alone."

I have another idea. "Do you know of anyone else who could help us?" Tori looks nervous and confused. "Tris and I caught each other leaving the school at the same time for the same reason the other day…"

Tori is finally catching on. She glances around, looks back at me, and holds her hand in front of her with four fingers out and her thumb folded under. I nod. "Thanks, Tori." Tris looks confused, so I mouth to her, 'later.'

I know who we need to see, and am thanking my lucky stars that it is someone who really can help us and who I believe we can trust.


	6. Chapter 6

**I do not own divergent or its characters, they belong to the amazing Veronica Roth.**

Chapter 6

"Okay, so, stance looks good. Do you think you should wait for me to make the first move, or no?" Tris and I are beginning to circle the ring to spar.

"I don't see how it would help me to make the first move. Wouldn't that just leave me open for you to hit me?" she asks.

I shrug. "Speed is your best strength at this point. You're fast. I'm pretty quick too, but you're faster, and you're wicked smart. That's what you've got to focus on. Identify weaknesses and exploit them." I grin. "Not that _I_ have any weaknesses, of course."

Tris laughs. "Sure, sure…" Tris steps forward to elbow me in the stomach, and I barely block her.

"See? I was barely quick enough to stop you there." We go back and forth for a while, her getting the occasional punch or kick in, me being careful not to use my full force on her—being beat up going into tomorrow's fights won't do her any favors.

Tris surprises me by sweeping my feet out from under me without her usual step forward that clues me in that she's about to make a move; before I recover she's on top of me, pinning me down. I could throw her off of me, but I kind of like this position.

We both seem to freeze, breathless. Her icy, stormy blue-gray eyes are mesmerizing, locking mine in their gaze. God, her eyes are captivating. Expressive. I can see her courage, determination, and stubbornness in those eyes. She bites her lip and it draws my attention… I want to kiss those lips. There is nothing else in the world but me, Tris, her beautiful pink lips that look so soft. I slowly begin to close the gap when Tris jumps up in response to the training room door slamming shut and a man clearing his throat.

"Four… hey…" She sounds timid, and her cheeks are bright red. I hop up and brush invisible dirt off me shorts. "Uriah's helping me train for the fights."

"Uh huh," Four says, glaring at me. What did I do? He's so moody. I don't get that guy. He notices the bandage on Tris's collarbone and steps a little closer to her than I'd like him to. "Did you hurt yourself?"

Tris shows him her new tattoo—three ravens flying toward her heart. It looks awesome, and suits her.

"We need to spar some more, Tris," I say, "in case you end up with a tough opponent tomorrow. You're getting better, though." Four's walking away to the punching bags. I put a hand on his shoulder to stop him. "Four, I need to talk to you."

Four raises his eyebrows and turns toward me, crossing his arms in front of his chest. "What about, Uri?"

I glance around, and up at the cameras. "Not here," I tell him. "Can we maybe meet you at your place or Zeke's sometime soon? This involves Tris, too." Tris has looked curious and puzzled, and I see her expression change as she realizes Four is the one we need to talk to about our divergence.

Four furrows his eyebrows. "Do you want to talk now?"

Tris and I glance at each other. I'm not sure if there's time tonight. "I'm not sure if she's ready for tomorrow's fights yet."

"We have an odd number of transfers. I can give you an extra day before you have to fight if you want, Tris. Someone has to sit out." I nod and we follow Four to his apartment.

* * *

Four's studio apartment is small, simple, tidy. A small table with two chairs sits near the kitchen. There's a bed in the opposite corner of the apartment with a tattered blue patchwork quilt, and a dresser next to the bathroom door. The walls are black, and one has "FEAR GOD ALONE" spray painted across it. Four crosses into the small kitchen and pulls three water bottles out of the fridge, then sits down at the table. I move to the chair opposite and Tris hops onto the counter, feet dangling off the edge, each of us grabbing a water bottle on our way.

"So, what's the big secret, that could involve the two of you?" Four asks. "And what do I have to do with it?"

"Tris and I are divergent," I state plainly.

"Shit!" He runs his hands through his hair. "Of course it has to be the stiff and my best friend's brother. How many other people know this? I mean, how do you even know about each other? Don't you understand that you can't go around telling people this?!" He's whisper-yelling and he looks crazed. I've never seen Four look this panicked. He's not afraid of much.

"I haven't told anyone but Uriah," Tris defends herself. "And now you. Uriah and I both left school at the same time after the aptitude test made us 'sick.'"

"I have only told Tris, Tori and you," I offer. "Tori because she administered Tris' aptitude test and she suggested we talk to you. I knew I could trust you because, well, Tori said I could about this, and you're a good friend to my brother. Oh, and I don't know why I told Tris. I just knew I could trust her for some reason. And of course guessed she was leaving early for the same reason."

Four stares at the table for a minute, until Tris breaks the silence. "So? Can you help us? What does divergent mean? What do we need to do?" I know she has to be nervous but she sure doesn't show it. She's steady, focused.

I fidget in my chair then get up and hop on the counter next to Tris, so close we're almost touching. Four is making me nervous. I feel calmer sitting next to her. Four looks away and sighs heavily before turning back toward us.

"Well, as you know, it means you fit into more than one faction. Your brain works differently. You can think in different ways, so you're unpredictable. Like take your brother, Uriah. He's Dauntless to the core. You can count on him to approach everything the same way. It's relatively easy to predict what he'll do."

It's true. Zeke is pretty predictable, compared with someone like Tris… or Four, really. Four must be divergent too.

"Why do they care if we can think differently?" Tris asks. "As long as we do what they want why does it matter?"

"Your intentions are what they care about. The only thing they care about. They try to make you think they care about what you do, but they don't. They don't want you to act a certain way. They want you to _think_ a certain way. So you're easy to understand. So you won't pose a threat to them. If you think differently, in a way they don't understand, they can't control you the same way they can other people."

Four crushes his empty water bottle and tosses it to the trash can a few yards away. I reach out and intertwine my fingers with Tris's, rubbing my thumb back and forth across her palm. "What were your test results?" he asks. He laughs at my Amity/Dauntless combination, and looks shocked at Tris's admission that she had equal aptitude for not two, but three factions.

"Now that I know Tris better, though," I say, "I can clearly see her bravery, and selflessness, and intelligence." She blushes.

"That's part of the problem," Four says. How can it be a problem that Tris is amazing? "They will notice. You have to look at every situation and make sure you approach it like a Dauntless. You don't want to draw their attention. And I'm sure you already have, Tris, by transferring from Abnegation and then being first jumper, alone. You stand out. And Uri… I don't even know what to say about Amity and Dauntless." Four chuckles again.

He continues, "The biggest issue is stage 2. You'll be doing fear simulations. Just like in the aptitude test, most people are not aware they're in a simulation. But you'll be aware. And because you know it's not real, may even be able to manipulate the sim. Make something appear that wasn't there before, for example."

"So how did you get past stage 2, Four?" Tris asks. Four narrows his eyes a bit. "Oh come on, Four. It seems very likely that you're divergent if you know so much about it and will help protect us, like Tori has."

Four nods. "Uriah, you remember Amar?" I nod. Of course I remember Amar. His family was friends with mine, and he was Zeke's initiation instructor. He died two years ago, an accident with a train. "He was divergent, and that's why he's dead. Tori's brother George, too."

My mind is racing. Is he saying what I think he is? Those deaths… someone _killed_ them? Just for being divergent? Amar was _murdered?_ I hop off the counter, rubbing my face with my hands, beginning to pace around the room. "Who would want to murder them? Murder us? They were good people. _We_ are good people. What the fuck is going on here?!" My heart is pounding, faster and faster, and it's getting hard to breathe. My eyes dart wildly around the room, which seems to be in danger of spinning around me.

Then I feel small but strong arms wrap around me, a delicate hand beginning to rub circles on my back. I look down into Tris's eyes. They're full of concern, though she's in as much danger as I am—probably more. She's got aptitude for three factions and it's obvious if you're really paying attention. Yes, she's most definitely in danger. But that fire in her eyes, that strength and courage and resolve, it makes me feel like she can do anything, we can do anything, and I can and must protect her. I wrap my arms tightly around her and look back at Four, who seems to be unable to look at us.

"Four," Tris says, her voice slightly muffled by my chest. "Tell us."

Four sighs. "Eric. You'll need to be especially careful around him. Eric knew about Amar. I think there's more going on with all this. I think Jeannine Matthews is involved. I haven't figured it all out yet." Jeannine Matthews. That's the leader of Erudite. I don't understand why it matters to her.

"Let us help, then." Tris has turned a bit in my arms so that her voice can be clearly heard, but she continues to rub circles on my back. Her touch is like magic, how it calms me. I sit back down into the kitchen chair and pull her into my lap. I can't let go of her. She's keeping me grounded. Four nods at her; he'll talk to us about whatever he can work out, maybe Tris's beautiful part-Erudite mind will figure out something Four and I can't.

"So stage two," I say, bringing the conversation back to the most immediate threat—concealing our divergence during initiation. "What do we do?"

"You just need to act like you don't know you're in a simulation, and think everything through, do it like a Dauntless would if the situation were real. I need to figure out how to help you prepare for that, though." He sighs. "I mean I could take you into my fear landscape to practice but then… I'd have to show you my fear landscape." He rubs the back of his neck. "Maybe we can trust Zeke with this."

" _Maybe_ we can trust Zeke?" I glare at him. He really thinks there's a possibility that _my brother_ would turn us in? Seriously? Now I'm seeing red. What kind of best friend is he, that he doesn't trust that my brother would have his, especially _my_ , safety at heart?

"Don't look at me like that," Four snaps. "If you were so sure that you could trust him, you'd have told him by now too. Of course I trust Zeke, but this isn't just about my safety, it's _his_ that could be at risk too, just for knowing about me. About the three of us."

I look down. He's right, but I'm still mad. Tris pulls herself out of my arms and stands between Four and me. "Look," she says, "arguing about Zeke isn't helping us right now. We don't have to figure all of this out tonight. We still have a while before stage two. There's time to think it through. Thank you, Four, for answering our questions and for helping us."

The jealousy in the pit of my stomach is unmistakable as I watch Four wrap his arms around Tris. "I'll keep you safe. Both of you," Four murmurs softly.

* * *

Instead of going back to the training room or the dormitory, I brought Tris up to the roof. We're lying on our backs looking up at the stars, neither of us saying anything for a while. My shoulder barely touches Tris's, and when her fingers intertwine with mine, my heart accelerates and warmth spreads through me. I turn my head toward Tris. Her eyes look so icy and clear in the moonlight. "Tris." She turns her head and looks back at me, and I roll onto my side to face her. "We're gonna be okay. We have each other, we can keep each other safe. We'll make it through this." I'm not sure I believe my words until I've said them, but the trust in her eyes… I have to make those words true. I have to keep my promise. It's like her courage and determination are pouring into me through our linked hands.

"We're okay," she whispers. "I can't imagine if I were alone with this secret."

I need to be closer to her. It's like every muscle in my body is straining toward her. Keeping our hands linked together, I scoot my body a few inches nearer to her and put my other arm around her waist. My stomach feels like the bottom dropped out and my lips feel like fire as I press them to her forehead. "You don't ever have to be alone with this, Tris. I'm not going anywhere."


	7. Chapter 7

**Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.**

Chapter 7

The training room smells of dust, sweat and dread. In the center of the room is a large mat, the white paint marking the edges of the sparring ring hardly visible from wear, the mat's blue color muted with the accumulation of dust. We're about to start our first round of fights this morning, and you can feel the tension radiating off of the eleven initiates. Lauren is standing at a chalkboard at one side of the room, writing out the pairings.

When she steps away from the board, I find mine right at the top—the first fight today. Really, being first is a relief; I won't have much time to get anxious about it. This way I can get it over with fast, like ripping off a bandaid.

Uriah / Luke  
Gabe / Rita  
Aaron / Lynn  
Sarah / Marlene  
James / Kate  
Aiden

Luke is probably one of the tougher initiates, but I think I'll be fine. I'm a good fighter, Zeke has given me plenty of practice. I have some "real world" fighting experience, too. A couple years ago, I caught my first girlfriend, Alison, cheating with me with a guy named Mike. I broke up with her, of course, but not before beating the shit out of Mike; he knew she was seeing me. Sometimes I've gotten in fights outside of school, too. Bullying makes me angry, and it happens a lot when people (kids, especially) of different factions are forced together. Most of the time, it's the Abnegation kids getting bullied, but I've stuck up for Erudite, Amity, and even some of the younger Dauntless dependents, too. Candor are usually pretty tough and more likely to be the bullies, though.

Tris doesn't even know about it, but twice I've gotten in fights defending her. Once it was an Erudite, the other time it was that Candor asshole that transferred here, Peter. If either of those jerks really bothered her, Tris didn't let it show; she just kept her head down and continued on without acknowledging them, even as they shoved and tripped her, making her drop her books. A "death glare" from me, arms crossed, made them stop their assaults, and once she had boarded the bus or disappeared toward the factionless sector on her way walking home, I had laid into them. The Stiffs never hurt anyone, or even bother anyone, but especially Tris. I guess since we sat together so often in school and she never hesitated to offer me help or kindness, I've always been a bit protective of her.

I'm thinking of those fights as I warm up and practice a few punches and kicks on the punching bags in the other corner of the room. I hope that Four kept his promise about letting Tris wait until tomorrow to fight. I'm sure he wouldn't intentionally break it, but Eric could overrule whatever Four has planned. She won't be ready if she has to go up against some of the stronger transfers like Peter, Al or Edward.

Besides her lack of experience with fighting, Tris and I were out pretty late last night. The conversation with Four left us both uneasy, so we ended up spending several hours on the roof, quiet, just being together. I'm not really the quiet type. I usually tend to fill any silences because I'm just not used to quiet. Dauntless is loud, Zeke is loud, I've always been surrounded by noise. For some reason, though, silence is comfortable when I'm with Tris. Sitting up there with her felt contented, peaceful, perfect. So we just laid on the roof, close together, holding hands, in that comfortable silence. She ended up dozing off with her head on my shoulder. I really wanted to kiss her, really kiss her. I think I probably stared at her lips half the time we were laying there. But I'm afraid I'll scare her away if I do that too soon, because she's still adjusting from growing up in Stiff-Land. Physical contact means a lot there, and it isn't that kissing her wouldn't be meaningful—it would be—I'm just not sure how she would react, since we haven't been hanging out that long yet. Anyway. I stared at the stars and enjoyed having her sleeping body cuddled against me until I knew we absolutely had to get to sleep if I didn't want to be totally useless for training today.

I'm snapped out of my daydreams by Lauren calling out my name. "Uriah and Luke! You're up!" As we enter the ring and get into a fighting stance, Lauren gives further instruction. "According to the new rules, no one concedes. You'll fight until one of you can no longer continue." Great. So I have to knock him out.

I wait for Luke to make the first move, studying him for weaknesses. The arm that's meant to protect his stomach is too high. I dodge his first punch and elbow him in the stomach. Luke staggers backward and I kick him in the side. He falls but quickly rights himself. He fakes a punch from my right and I fall for it, resulting in my taking a blow to the left side of my jaw. That's gonna leave a nasty bruise. I back away and steady myself, then circle a bit. Luke kicks, but I catch his leg and yank his feet out from under him; he lands on his back. After a couple kicks to his ribs, I want this over with. I don't really like hurting people. I punch him hard in the temple and his eyes roll back. "Done! Uriah wins," Lauren calls out as she circles my name on the chalkboard.

Aiden helps me drag Luke to the infirmary, and when we return, Gabe's name has been circled on the blackboard and Lynn in the ring, with Aaron in front of her curled up in a ball and Lynn kicking him in the head. Seriously, I hope I don't end up paired with Lynn at any point, because while I'm likely the better fighter, Lynn fights mean. She shows no mercy. Lauren calls the fight and circles Lynn's name. After Marlene easily beats Sarah and a long match between James and Kate ends with Kate victorious but almost as beat up as James, we spend some time at the punching bags before being dismissed for the day.

I look in the other training room for Four, I wanted to see if he'd decided about taking Tris and me into the fear landscapes, but the training room is empty. I amble over to the dormitory to grab some clothes to change into after I shower, and over hear anxious voices saying something about transfers and the Chasm. I begin to feel a bit uneasy and cross the room to where Gabe, Luke and Aaron are talking, forcing a smirk onto my face. "What are you ladies gossiping about?"

"Oh, just the transfers," Aaron says dismissively. "We heard that one of them ignored Eric's orders so he made her hang over the Chasm." He shrugs, as if it was nothing. My breath hitches when he says 'her'. Which 'her'? Is 'she' okay?

And, did I mention that I hate bullies? Eric is a bully if I ever saw one. I can't stand that guy.

That said, Dauntless is a dangerous place, and we're training to be soldiers. You have to know how to take orders, and you have to be very tough. I know this. But the nervous feeling in my stomach is getting a lot stronger, because Tris is brave and stubborn and I could totally see her back talking Eric. She may have ignored bullies and kept her head down when she was still a Stiff, but that girl is Dauntless through and through, and now that she's here… well, I can't see her putting her head down and ignoring it all like she used to in school.

I try to keep my expression neutral, and not give away the panicked feeling radiating throughout my body. "I guess there's a reason this girl isn't in Erudite," I say with a grin. "Do you know which one it was? Is she okay? I'm friends with some of them…"

Luke shrugs. "I'm not sure but I think it was one of the Candor. She didn't fall, she's okay I think." Luke raises his eyebrows when I release a breath I didn't know I was holding. Then it isn't Tris, hopefully. Though Christina was Candor and doesn't know when to keep her mouth shut; I hope it was the other Candor and not her.

"I guess I should go find my friends and make sure they're all in one piece." I raise my hand in farewell as I head out of the room toward the Pit. Ugh, but I need to shower and change; I definitely don't want to see Tris fresh out of training like this. I probably don't smell that great.

I clean myself up and get changed as quick as I can and head straight out to find Christina and Tris. I run into Marlene and Lynn on my way and stop to talk to them. They confirm that it wasn't Tris, but rather Christina, and that she's shaken but okay.

Muscles I didn't know I was tensing instantly relaxed. I was about to panic thinking Tris might have had to hang over the Chasm like that, that she could be hurt. There's no denying my feelings. I'm turning into a lovesick pansycake but somehow I'm not sure I mind. I need to tell her. I don't want to scare her, I'm sure she's pretty modest and shy given her Abnegation upbringing, but hey, maybe I can help her become a little more Dauntless, right? Right. Yep, you tell yourself that Uri. I have to. Or else I'll totally chicken out, and I ain't no pansycake, I'm Dauntless. I'm not going to be scared by a girl, no matter how amazing she is. I just need to find the right way to tell her how I feel.

 **A/N: So, this chapter is kind of short and bit boring… I wanted to give you something, at least, while I work out where this story is going, a little better. Hopefully I'll be a little quicker to update in the future!**


	8. Chapter 8

**I do not own Divergent or its characters. Anything you recognize belongs to Veronica Roth.**

 **Chapter 8**

I stand in the doorway to the transfers' dormitory. The room is identical to the one my fellow Dauntless-borns and I sleep in: gray concrete floor, cold rock walls, and a row of half a dozen old bunk beds that squeak anytime you roll over during the night. My gaze hones right in on the third bunk to the left, the one I know that Tris sleeps on the bottom of, with Al above her and Christina to her left. Instead of Tris, I see Peter and Molly and I'm certain they aren't up to anything good. Those two, along with Peter's other sidekick, Drew, are creeps. They're exactly what Dauntless doesn't need: bullies. They care for no one but themselves; protecting others, standing up for those weaker than them, that isn't the priority for these cruel former Candors.

 _We believe in ordinary acts of bravery, in the courage that drives one person to stand up for another._

I don't think those three bothered to read that part of the Dauntless Manifesto before transferring here.

Sometimes I think our leaders could use a refresher on it, too.

Neither of the jerks hear me coming up behind them, but I'm close enough now to see what they're doing. Peter holds a can of red spray paint, and Molly, a small jar of red paint and a brush. They are painting Tris's bed. Peter has marked the sheets and pillow, Molly is almost done painting the frame, all with the word 'STIFF' in bright red. The air I breathe is too warm, too heavy. My fingers curl into fists involuntarily. My vision flashes almost as red as the paint they've used on Tris's bunk.

"Afraid of a little girl from Abnegation, Peter?" I taunt. He jumps, whipping around to face me. "You must be if you need to try and shake her like this instead of relying on your skill in the training room." His face is turning pink and his fingers twitch. "You must be a lot weaker and more cowardly than I thought. Pathetic."

'Coward' is where I got him, and Peter lets his fist fly. I block him easily and retaliate with a hard punch to his nose. Tris' bunk is now stained with more red as blood streams from Peter's broken nose. I knock Peter off balance with a hard jab to jaw, swinging around in time to dodge Molly's attempt to hit me, immediately kicking her legs out from under her. All I can comprehend is my anger as I kick and punch I don't know how many times, only to finally focus back on the world when I hear Tris's shocked calls. "Uriah! Stop! Whatever they did, you made your point!" Delicate hands wrap gently grip my arms; her touch calms my pounding heart.

Seeing that I'm finally calm, Tris checks on Molly while I check on Peter. Both are lie on the concrete limp and unconscious. "What happened, Uri?" Tris asks, seeming satisfied that Molly and Peter's injuries aren't too great.

I look away from her as I run my hand through my hair. "Well, look at your bed, Tris," I respond with an edge in my voice. It's like she's unhappy with me or something, for beating them up? I did it for her! But when she sees what they did to her bed, her face turns red and she glares down at the two unconscious initiates. Wordlessly, we begin stripping her bed of its linens. "We'll get this scrubbed off the frame later. We barely have time to run to the dining hall for a muffin before training and you're definitely fighting today."

Tris nods as we quickly head toward the dining hall. "Thank you," she says after a minute. "For sticking up for me." She glances at my face, her brows furrowed.

I look at her face for a moment and intertwine my fingers with hers. "Well, I care about you, Tris," I say quietly. Can she hear my heart pounding? The volume I'm hearing it in my ears makes me think she likely can. I need to make a joke or something to lighten the mood in case she's freaked out by that admission or something but my mind is just blank. I don't like this, I don't feel like myself.

Finally, after an excruciating silence—it felt like forever, probably it only took her a few seconds to respond. I really don't know; I think time might have stopped for a minute there—she smiles. "You're a good friend, Uriah. Thank you. I care about you, too."

It's like a punch in the gut. Did I just get friend zoned?! I have to find some way to fix that, and soon. Make a joke, Uri. Make a joke! I smile at her goofily. "Well of course you do; no one can resist my beautiful face." I've earned a giggle. That's something at least.

We grab our muffins and begin to eat them on the way to the training rooms. I bite right into the muffin top while Tris breaks off small pieces, popping them in her mouth one by one.

I didn't see Tris last night, and Zeke wasn't working so he trained her. I really want to hang out with her tonight. She tells me about training with my brother last night, which sounds like it went well, and as I walk with her to her training room and peek in to see who she's fighting, I sure hope she got as much out of training as she thinks she did, because she's up against Peter. Shit. Seeing the chalkboard, Tris stops mid-step.

I face her, my hands gripping her narrow shoulders, forcing her attention to me. "You got this, Tris. Win or lose, you're gonna put up a good fight, right?" She nods. "He's a jerk, Tris, I've seen him bothering you more than once even before you transferred. You can do this, Tris. Do some damage. You know how to do this. You're so quick, I really think you've got a chance to beat him, okay? Get back at him for this morning."

Tris doesn't look scared any more. Tris has the most expressive eyes I've ever seen, it's like I can read every emotion she's feeling in them. And right now, they are filled with that fiery spirit I love about her, all determination and defiance. A few steps into the hall toward the Dauntless-born training room, I turn on my heel, jogging back to Tris. Touching her right shoulder with one hand, I lean in from behind her, my mouth next to her ear. "He steps before he punches. Watch for it."

* * *

The harsh scent of strong cleanser assaults my senses as I scrub the bedframe. I fought Kate today. She's not one of the stronger fighters, and in minutes Lauren sent her to the infirmary unconscious with a broken nose and probably a concussion and a few bruised or cracked ribs; I walked away virtually unscathed. The transfers hadn't been dismissed yet, so I am helping Tris out with the graffiti on her bed while I wait. I'm hoping to ask her to hang out with me tonight, if she isn't in the infirmary from her fight with Peter.

I've almost finished scrubbing when I recognize Christina's loud, sunny voice echoing down the hallway. A moment later, Al, Will and Christina walk in, soon followed by Edward, Molly and Myra. No Tris.

The bed creaks as Will sits on it. "What happened here?"

"Peter painted 'Stiff' all over Tris' bed this morning. We threw out the sheets and stuff but had to leave the bed, so I thought I'd help clean it up while I waited to hear how Tris's fight went today."

Christina smirks knowingly before filling me in on the day's events. "Well, she didn't win, but she lasted a long time. They both ended up in the infirmary. Peter knocked her out, but he's in bad shape, too. Probably some cracked ribs at least, I think."

I couldn't hide my satisfied grin if I tried. Maybe she didn't win but there's no way she could have put Peter in the infirmary a week ago. My fingers are red and raw from the time spent on my bunk berd restoration project. The red paint isn't totally gone, but it's impossible to make out the offending word from the few bits of red that remain, just as scrubbing away the word won't ever fully erase the incident from Tris's memory and heart.

* * *

"What happened to your face?" Tris is sitting on a bed in the infirmary, her perfect skin peppered with a few cuts and bruises, but with far less damage than one would expect to see after Tris faced Peter.

"Look who's talking," Christina laughs.

"Well, I already know what happened to _my_ face," Tris says. "I was there. Sort of." I snort; Tris is getting bolder and it matches the mischief and spirit that shines in her stormy blue-gray eyes.

"Did you just make a _joke_ , Tris?" Will says with a grin. "We should get you on painkillers more often if you're going to start cracking jokes. Oh, and to answer your question—I beat her up."

The others discuss the transfers' fights as I plop down into a chair next to the bed. Leaning forward, I study Tris's face. The left side of her jaw is purple and swollen. I reach out gently touch the red cut, already scabbing up, on her right eyebrow. I smirk. "I saw Peter on the way in; his face looks just as bad as yours. Christina said you got his ribs pretty good, too. Living up to that badass nickname I gave you, I see."

Tris rewards me with that grin I always long to see. "I never could have done this well without your help, Uri. I'd probably be staying here overnight instead of heading to dinner with you guys now. Though I'm not so sure I'm up for training tonight," Tris admits.

Standing, I reach out to pull her up so we can get out of here. "Even better; we can do something fun, instead, then." The now familiar jolt of electricity I always feel when we touch shoots from my fingertips into my arm and straight through my body.

Two hours later, Tris and I lay side by side in the net. Was it just days ago that we jumped off a roof and landed here? I could swear it's been years; it's been a lifetime. My left shoulder touches Tris's right; my opposite hand clutches the vodka-filled flask I snuck out of Zeke's apartment. I pull a long swig, swallowing smoothly as the liquid burns down my throat, before handing it to Tris. "I've never had alcohol before," Tris says timidly before taking a tentative sip. A laugh bubbles up through my chest and into the air as she shudders.

"Yeah, this certainly isn't something you drink for the taste, but it'll make you a little less _stiff_ and a bit more Dauntless." I love these moments alone with her. I've always been someone with a lot of energy, I rarely sit still. Somehow, with her, I'm content. Calm. Instead of being ready to move, like a tightly coiled spring, the restless, eager tension just disappears from my body. I've noticed that Tris is the same way; she and I both tend to stand on the balls of our feet, always ready for action, until we're alone in a moment like this.

Tonight is the night. That's what I told myself before I asked her to come here with me. Another gulp of liquid courage burns my throat. _Do I just come out and say it? Do I just lean in and kiss her? What is wrong with me? I've never had this much trouble approaching a girl before. Then again, I've only asked out Dauntless girls. Tris is different._ I know I'm a good-looking guy. I mean, I may joke a lot about it and my sense of humor may be pretty cocky, but really, I know I'm not bad to look at. My nose isn't too big or too small and my eyes are a warm chocolate brown. I'm tall at 6 foot 2, a whole foot taller than Tris, and my muscles are toned but I'm not overly bulky. I think I'm pretty kind, and easy to be with, and hopefully my jokester attitude is funny rather than annoying. I can do this, right? She's got to feel the sparks when we touch too… right?

The moonlight casts a pale glow on the net. Tris's eyes appear brighter than ever in this eerie light, almost glowing an icy blue. She is an angel from another world.

"You're so beautiful, Tris." I blurt the words out, yet my voice comes out so soft, it's almost a whisper. Tris' eyes go wide and round, and her cheeks flush.

Tris shakes her head. "I know I'm not, Uri. Don't say that I am," she whispers.

I don't think I'll ever understand how Tris sees herself. I suppose that growing up as she did, being taught to never focus on herself or value beauty, no one ever told her. I can't relate to that at all. My father died when I was young, but Mom has always been Zeke and my biggest cheerleader. I don't think a day has ever gone by without hearing from her that I am handsome, or smart (that one I know isn't true, though—I'm not dumb, but I'm certainly no Erudite), or strong, or just plain loved. Mom always took interest in my interests, always has been up for a game when I'm bored, I've always been made to feel worthy and important, and affection has always been given freely.

"Don't say that, Tris. To me, you're one of the most beautiful girls there is. Especially your eyes. It's like they demand attention. And you're so brave, kind, selfless… I wish you saw yourself the way I see you."

Tris's blush grows deeper, but she doesn't argue. My eyes are fixed on her lips. I want to kiss her, right now, more than anything. It's all I can think about. Will that scare her away? Am I Dauntless enough to take the risk?

The unstable surface of the net beneath us shifts as I try to turn on my side and prop myself up on my left elbow. The center of the net dips down a bit, and Tris giggles a little as the net's movement causes her to roll toward me a little. My eyes settle back on her lips, and I reach out with my right hand to cradle her cheek as I lean in closer. So close, we're breathing the same air.

Gently, hesitantly, I press my lips against hers. She freezes and I pull away a little. I'm not sure whether to kiss her again, unsure of what her reaction means. Whether she doesn't like me in that way, or it's just the Abnegation in her. _I am Dauntless, I am brave, I am not afraid of taking a risk._ I tilt my head and lean in again, and this time she kisses back. Sparks become jolts of electricity. I wrap my arm around Tris' waist and she tangles her hand in my mop of dark loose curls. The kiss is long, slow, tender. Her lips are as soft as silk and warm and taste sweet, faintly like chocolate.

I could stay in this moment forever.


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Divergent and its characters all belong to Veronica Roth.**

Chapter 9

"Everybody up!" The dormitory is pitch black, aside from the beams of light darting around the room from the flashlights in Eric's and Four's hands. I rub my eyes as I roll off the lumpy mattress that I got to sleep on for maybe half an hour so far tonight. Eric's many piercings glint in the little bit of light they catch. "You have five minutes to get dressed and meet us by the tracks." Then the pair of eighteen-year-olds is gone, probably to wake the transfers.

I pull on black jeans, a tank top, and a black hoodie. I hurry too much trying to tie the laces on my boots and fumble, only making it take longer—I'm just too excited about tonight! I've been waiting for this for years. There can only be one reason our instructors would wake us all to meet at the train at this time of night, and that reason is Capture the Flag.

I'm momentarily blinded when someone turns on the lights. When my eyes adjust bright patches stop flashing across my vision, I return to fumbling with my laces, looking up when a pair of boots comes toe to toe with mine. Marlene's grin shows off her straight white teeth, and as always, there's a mischievous glint in her eyes. She kneels in front of me. "I'll tie this one and you tie the other, just _slow down_ so you can actually do it right."

Lynn rolls her eyes. "I can't believe tying your shoes is even an issue, Uriah. What are you, six?"

"And a half," I grin, _slowly_ tying my right boot so I can get out of here before the train leaves without us.

"He's just excited," Marlene says. She ruffles my hair. "Like a big goofy puppy." I make snuffling sounds right next to her ear as if I were actually a puppy, and Mar nearly touches her ear to her shoulder in an attempt to escape the unsettling feeling of person-turned-puppy next to her ear.

Our laughter echoes in the dimly lit hallway as we sprint to the train tracks. Tris appears beside me as I follow Marlene and Lynn in grabbing a gun from the large black pile on the platform and pocket a box of paintballs. Bouncing on the balls of my feet as an outlet for some of my excited energy, I intertwine my fingers with Tris' while we wait for the train that rumbles in the distance. It's been two days since our kiss at the net. Yesterday we went on a field trip to the fence to learn about Dauntless jobs, and today I easily beat my opponent, Sarah, at our fight.

Four is the first on the train; he pulls Tris into the train car and I hop on after her. Four has his hands on Tris's waist, steadying her. I press my cold fingers against my cheeks to cool them and I try to ignore the uneasy feeling in my stomach, seeing his hands on her, so I wrap my arm around her waist and lead her to the other side of the train, earning a glare from Four. I suspected yesterday at the fence that I had some competition from him with Tris, but I also know he can't try to do anything until after initiation anyway. He's her instructor; there's no way a relationship between them would be acceptable right now, lucky for me. I don't know that Tris likes Four, but pretty much every girl in Dauntless wants him, so… yeah…

"We're playing capture the flag," I whisper in Tris's ear. "I've been waiting for tonight pretty much forever!" Tris's face reflects my grin before she greets Christina, Will, Marlene and Lynn. Eventually Al lumbers over to us as well. Before I can even tell him hello, Four begins to speak.

"We'll be dividing into two teams to play capture the flag. Each team will have an even mix of members, Dauntless-born initiates, and transfers. One team will get off first and find a place to hide their flag. Then the second team will get off and do the same. This is a Dauntless tradition, so I suggest you take it seriously."

Eric and Four are the team captains. Four lets Eric choose first, beginning with the transfers, and Edward is the first pick. Four casually leans against the doorframe as his eyes scan the initiates before he says, "I want the Stiff." _Yeah, I'll bet you do, Four._ Tris slips from my grasp and stands behind Four, her cheeks red at a comment from Eric about Four choosing the weak ones. If he thinks she's weak, he's not paying enough attention.

Eric and Four take turns picking transfers, with Four picking Christina, Will and Drew. Eric has picked Peter, Molly and Al, then Myra, by default as she's the last transfer left.

It's Four's turn for first pick when they start Dauntless-born initiates and I pump my fist when the first name he calls is mine. I snake my arm back around Tris's shoulder as Marlene, Kate, Aaron, James and Rita join us. As the members are finally picked, Tris whispers to me, "Four's smart. We've got all the fast ones. I don't imagine that brute strength is such an advantage for a game like capture the flag." I grin. She's right, and she's smart to figure it out. Eric is a former Erudite; you'd think he'd have better strategy than this.

Twenty minutes later, the members have been picked for teams, our team has jumped off the train first, and we've decided to head to the Carousel as that's where Zeke and Four's team hid the flag when they won as initiates. The road is littered with broken glass and chunks of concrete, and the buildings in this area of the city are abandoned and crumbling.

Ahead of us, the Ferris wheel comes into view. Dozens of red cars dangle around the edges of the giant circle of rusted metal.

"Think about it," Will says, jerking his chin toward the wheel, then shaking his head. "People used to ride that thing. For _fun."_

"They must have been Dauntless," Tris says.

I laugh. "Nah, it would be pretty hard to fall out of those. Not daring enough for the Dauntless."

"Yeah, a Dauntless Ferris wheel wouldn't have cars. You would just hang on tight with your hands, and good luck to you," Christina agrees.

We reach the carousel and I sit side saddle on a wooden horse. Its brown paint is chipped and its tail ends abruptly where half of it has been broken off.

Four takes the flag out of his pocket. "In ten minutes, the other team will pick their location. I suggest you take this time to formulate a strategy. We may not be Erudite, but mental preparedness is one aspect of your Dauntless training. Arguably, it is the most important aspect."

Will takes the flag out of Four's hand and suggests splitting up, half the team guarding our flag and the other half on offense. Marlene seems irritated, and she and Will argue for a moment. Christina suggests just playing defense and waiting of the other team to find us so we can take them out. This strategizing is boring, I want in on the action. "That's the sissy way out," I complain. "I vote we go all out. Hide the flag well enough that they can't find it." Then we can all attack and get their flag.

At first I push for my 'all in' strategy as the team argues. Tris actually _is_ part Erudite, so she's probably pretty good at this strategy stuff and I look to her… to discover that she is no longer there. Dropping to the ground, I walk away from the group and see her a hundred yards away on the service ladder to the Ferris wheel. Her hands hold a rung just above her head, and she jumps up and down a bit on the second rung, testing it. I approach as she slings her gun behind her back and climbs the first few rungs.

"Were you seriously going to climb this thing without me? I'm hurt!" I cross both hands over my heart dramatically. "I thought we were friends, Tris, and you left me behind."

Tris turns and looks down at me with a grin. "You noticed I was gone, huh? Well come on, then!"

Seconds later my hands are on the rough, rusted bar one rung below Tris' feet, alternating feet and arms at a comfortable rhythm as we climb. The wind smells fresh and sweet. A Ferris wheel gondola near me sways slightly as it's hit by a stronger gust. I glance down and behind me. Four is watching us from the ground a dozen yards from the base of the wheel, and part of the team is setting off, to scout, I guess.

"So what's our plan, Beatrice?"

Pausing, Tris looks down at me with a glare. " _Beatrice_ would not be a several stories up on this ladder. You gave me the name Tris, use it please." I chuckle. "Anyway… our plan is to climb high enough that we can see the other team's flag. We need to know where they are before we can do anything."

Why didn't I think of that? Told ya I wasn't particularly smart.

"I've always liked climbing," I say. "Like trees and stuff. Once I climbed on top of the carousel down there, I think I was about 8, for a dare. I fell off and broke my arm. It was pretty cool though, it was my first cast and I thought it was awesome that I got to have everyone sign it."

"I always got in trouble for climbing trees, but I loved it," Tris reflects. "I wished I could build a tree fort. But you know, in Abnegation… anything that is simply because it's fun or you enjoy it is selfish."

I roll my eyes. "I wanted a tree fort too, but the reason I didn't get to build one is, well… I lived in an apartment underground. We didn't really HAVE any trees of our own." It's getting so cold… the wind is stronger the higher we go.

Tris chuckles. "By the way, I always wanted a cast. In fact, one summer, I snuck up to climb trees and stuff every chance I got just so I could jump down and try and break my arm, just so I could have a cast for everyone to sign."

A strong gust of wind throws Tris to the side, threatening to knock her off the ladder and my reaction is automatic. I don't even remember deciding to scramble up behind Tris. Suddenly I'm just there, my feet two rungs below hers, one hand on top of hers and the other grabbing her waist, my hand against her skin where her shirt has ridden up, warm and sending that familiar spark of electricity through me. I almost feel light-headed. "You okay?" I breathe. Tris manages a strangled-sounding yes. I keep my hand on her waist a little longer than I need to before forcing myself to move it back to the metal ladder, which feels much colder after removing it from Tris's skin. I let her climb ahead of me again, but stay overlapping her a bit just in case.

Probably a hundred feet off the ground, the ladder ends at a platform. I copy Tris, climbing onto the platform and hanging my legs off the side. Looking out over the marsh, so high above everything, the moonlight… I can't resist wrapping my arm around her, my hand squeezing her waist. I'm lost in her eyes, which stare back into mine.

"I really like you, Tris," I quietly admit.

This time it's Tris who breaks the stare by leaning in and kissing me. I'm not sure how long we stay that way; I'm lost in her. Then the kiss breaks, and her forehead leans against mine. When I finally open my eyes, my brown eyes find her round, icy blue ones as if pulled by a magnet. "I like you, too," she whispers. Her eyes close, and after a deep breath in and slow exhale, Tris's eyes pop back open and she sits up straight, leaving the space around me cold and empty. The corners of her mouth turn up in the beginning of a smile, her eyes are bright. "We've got a game to win, and we're not high enough." She's right, there's a building still in our way. She stands. "I'm going to climb."

"Right behind you."

The ladder doesn't go up any higher than this platform, so now we're climbing the web of metal beams that makes up the wheel itself. I was okay on the ladder, but in this tangle of metal, my stomach is dropping like a rock. If I fell from here, it wouldn't be a broken arm like when I fell off the carousel roof during a game of dare; there'd be no surviving a fall like this. _In, out. In, out._ Focusing on my keeping my breaths steady helps soften that rock that seems to have replaced my stomach.

We finally stop, my chest to Tris's back, my chin hovering over her shoulder, high enough to look past the building that had been blocking our view. "See that?" Tris is pointing toward a light flashing in the park. It's the other team's flag.

I grin. "Yep, it's in the park at the other end of the Pier. The trees don't block it well enough from up here. You, beautiful, are wicked smart." I capture her lips in a kiss, harder than the ones we shared on the platform, and pull back with a grin. "Let's climb down and get that flag."

I'm about halfway back to the ladder and my hands are about a yard below Tris's feet when the bar she steps on breaks free, clanging loudly as it hits the wheel several times on its way to the ground. And it's a long, long way that it falls. Tris dangles a few yards above me from only her hands, and we are still hundreds of feet in the air. "Uri! Help!"

"Shit!" My eyes are darting around and I can barely focus. I have to get to her. I see a route to get to the bar she hangs from, and I don't see any other option but to get her from above. I just hope that I can hold on and we don't _both_ fall to our deaths.

Climbing swiftly to one side, then up and over, I wrap my legs around two bars at their junction with the bar Tris hands, mostly red with stark white knuckles due to her tight grip, desperately hold onto. The way the spokes on this wheel are built, It's like a pattern of a horizontal bar connecting the two sides, then an x, connecting the top two corners of the x is another horizontal bar, and so on. Tris hangs from the diagonal bars on the bottom of an X, no horizontal bar beneath her feet any more, and a ways to drop to try and catch the next X.

I could try climbing down and see if the wheel still works, but if it doesn't, I'll be so far away from her and it would take so long to get back and help her. "Okay, Tris, I'm not going to let you fall." I'm climbing back up along the outside until I'm level with her. "I am going to hold on around this bar, the one your left hand is on, and I'm hoping I can reach the one above too. Then try and swing your left leg over as far as you can so we can try and get it around this bar, okay?" Holy shit I feel unsteady. These bars aren't that thick, I'm balancing in a sharp corner and I can reach that next place they cross but I'm not sure if I'll be able to reach her leg.

"Time to swing your leg up, Tris. You can do it, you're strong and brave, Tris, and you're not going to fall. We're going to get you down." I know her hands and arms must be screaming hanging there so long, but she still manages to contort herself so that her toe almost makes it to the bar. I can just barely reach her foot and I get hold of it, nearly losing my balance in the process, but after a moment I'm steady and am able to pull her foot over and hook her knee around the bar. From there, with a little help from my free hand, Tris twists her body so her belly rests on the horizontal bar. We pant in relief before I reach around her waist and pull her with me to a spot where three bars meet, giving us a safer spot to rest.

"Thank you," Tris breathes.

"Thank God you're okay, I was so scared, Tris." I pull her close to me and press my lips to her forehead.

Now seeing over my shoulder, Tris, always curious, notices something. "Uriah, look. Why are Erudite's lights on so late? The lights curfew was hours ago."

I remember something Four said just a few nights ago. _'I think there's more going on with all this. I think Jeannine Matthews is involved. I haven't figured it all out yet.'_

"We should say something to Four. He was saying something about Erudite the other night." Tris nods, and we wordlessly climb down the spoke of the wheel, then the ladder. A few minutes later, we're safely on the ground.

As we near the carousel, Four rushes forward to meet us. "I can't believe you climbed that thing. Are you two even _human?_ And then I saw Tris almost fall…" Four shakes his head. "I was afraid Uriah would fall while trying to help you down, Tris, or I would have tried to turn the wheel on."

I nod in understanding. I'd had the same idea about turning the wheel on. "Well, it looks like you made a good first pick in Tris," I say with a grin, "because now we know where their flag is."

I bound toward our team, buzzing with energy. "We know where their flag is! Tris climbed the Ferris wheel to spot the other team." My grin is so wide that it's making me sore.

"So what now, Tris?" Four seems to be putting Tris in charge, which is smart—she's got to be the cleverest one here.

Soon Tris has proposed a plan and we're on our way to steal Eric's flag. Tris, Christina and I are sneaking around to get their flag from behind while Marlene and a few others charge from the front. The quiet evening suddenly bursts into a chorus of whizzes, pops, and splats as a rainbow of colors begins to cover trees and people, particularly those from Eric's team. It's our cue to act. I keep in step with Christina and Tris until I hear footsteps barreling toward us. I barely duck a paintball from Eric's gun, shoot back at him, and miss once before landing a direct shot of pink paint to Eric's chest. I shoot again, taking out Al, just as I hear Christina begin to cheer. I'm with Chris and Tris as fast as my feet will carry me, lifting Tris onto my shoulders; it may have been Christina that snatched the flag, but the strategy that won was all Tris. She's the hero of the day.

On the ride back to Dauntless, Marlene, Will, Christina, Lynn, Tris and I sit in a back corner of the train car, laughing with my friends, old and new, and squishing unused paintballs at them—though that joke went very wrong when one broke the wrong way and the paint all sprayed into my mouth. Guess what I found out? Paint tastes awful. Truly disgusting.

But through all the laughter, in the back of my mind, Four's words about the Erudite, and Tris' discovery of their lights on well past curfew, presumably working into the still of the night, looms over me like a dark shadow and deep inside I know something is not right.

And I need to know what it is.


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: As always, I don't own Divergent or its characters.**

Chapter 10

Being out so late playing Capture the Flag means that I rolled out of bed with an exhausted groan this morning. I'm tired. The kind of tired that makes you feel like your bones are aching. So I was relieved, when I arrived to the training room, to find that we were not fighting today. Today was target practice.

I have less experience with throwing knives than I do with guns, but I'm not bad. Zeke is decent at it but Four's throws are perfect every time, so Four was the one to teach me. Amar, who apparently died because of being divergent, was Four's initiation instructor. Four told me that Amar noticed that Four had a busy mind and taught Four to tie his throwing to his breathing. My 'busy mind' is far more obvious than Four's—I'm downright hyperactive most of the time, really. So, it was obviously helpful advice for me, as well.

I don't know what the transfers' throwing looks like, but most of the Dauntless-born can at least stick the knife within a few throws. _Check stance, good. Inhale, pass knife from my left hand to my right; exhale, move arm into position, balancing the knife in my hand. Inhale, stare at the target, focus; exhale, throw._ Bam! My first throw sticks within the inner circle. Marlene whistles next to me; I respond with a cocky grin. By my fifth throw, I'm consistently hitting bulls eyes. Lauren eventually taps my shoulder and tells me to go practice on the punching bags since I obviously am proficient with the knives.

I end up sparring a bit with Sarah—she needs the practice (though she's great with weapons) and I had the time. As a result, we end up clearing out a few minutes behind the rest. As I walk down the hall toward lunch, I hear angry yelling and pause near the door.

"—on _purpose!"_ That's Tris shouting. I can only hear the response well enough to know that it's Four; I can't tell what he's saying, he's speaking too quietly. Now Tris isn't as loud, but she still sounds furious, and she's loud enough to hear. " _Thank_ you?" I can only make out about every other word through the thick door. "….stabbed my ear… entire… taunting. Why should I thank you?"

This time Four is plenty loud enough. "You know, I'm getting a little tired of waiting for you to catch on!"

I'm not entirely sure what happened, but I _do_ know that Four really is trying to help Tris and me, and this doesn't sound like it's going well. I also know he can be a complete jerk, and she probably has reason to be upset. Anyway, I've heard their heated voices long enough; it's time I break out my Amity side and go play peacemaker.

Pushing quietly through the doors, I cross the room to Tris and gently put a hand on her arm. She's standing next a target knives stuck into it next to her left arm, above her head, and right by her right ear. My breathing hitches when I see the blood trickling down from the top of her ear, right where that knife in the target would be if she was standing against it, and it's pretty easy to figure out that Tris standing against that target was exactly the scenario that played out, and that Four was the one throwing the knives.

"Tris, are you okay?" my voice comes out higher and faster than I mean it to. _Four is trying to help us._ Deep breath in, long breath out. Repeat. _He must have had a reason._

"She stupidly stood up for Al," Four growls, glaring at Tris, "so Eric made her stand in front of the target and made _me_ throw knives at her." My eyes widen and my palms sweat. Nobody stands up to Eric. You just don't do it. Dauntless is not the kind of place where you can question your leaders without repercussions. He looks at me, his hands gesturing wildly as he continues. "You know as well as I do that I can't just tell Eric no. If I hadn't cut her, she'd still be in front of that target and I'd still be standing there," he points, "throwing knives at her."

I step closer to Tris and very lightly run my hand up and down her back, trying to soften my impending warning. "Tris, you can't call attention to yourself like that." My voice is gentle, but she still glares daggers at me. Really, she looks like she'd like to throw knives at me, and Four for that matter, just like Four did to her a few minutes ago.

Tris blows a stray lock of hair out of her face and sighs. "Whatever. I'm going to eat lunch." With that, she's gone, stalking away without looking back.

I sigh. "Look, Four—"

"Save it, Uriah. I don't need you to yell at me, too." He turns and begins to stomp off, but I grab his arm.

"I wasn't going to, Four. You did what you had to, she'll get over it. I just wanted to see if I could maybe come… talk to you about something? Tonight maybe?"

Four ran his hand through his hair. "Should I expect Tris, too?" I nod. "Okay. After dinner. Maybe 7:30." He glances at the door Tris just left from, rolling his eyes. "See if you can get her to chill out about the knives first. She's obviously in no mood to listen to _me._ " I give him a fist bump but his voice stops me and I turn, half in and half out the door, to face him. "She's doing really well. You and Zeke are doing a good job helping her. I wasn't sure if she'd survive stage one when I first saw her on Choosing Day, but I'm pretty confident she'll be fine now."

I smile. "Good. She's Dauntless as they come. She belongs here." Then I leave him and his sad smile behind in favor of lunch.

* * *

At the lunch table, Will is reading an Erudite newspaper. The transfers never seem to truly leave their old factions behind. Even Four—he's so closed off, doesn't really date or ever touch anyone—totally Stiff, even if he _is_ a living legend, the Dauntless prodigy with only four fears.

"Where'd you get that?" I question Will.

"Eric left behind. Thought I'd see what was happening in the city." See? Eric transferred from Erudite; just another example of transfers not really leaving their old faction behind. "Just more bullshit articles about the 'evil' Abnegation."

Tris raises her eyebrows and gives me a look I can't quite read. It's somewhere in the realm of worried, unsure, skeptical. "So you don't agree with your old faction about the Abnegation, then?"

"No," says Will, "I don't. Many Erudite don't. And many do. I can understand wanting more say in the government but I don't believe the lies they print to drum up support. If the Stiffs were stealing the extra food instead of giving it to the factionless, why has literally every Abnegation kid I've ever met been so damn scrawny?" Tris scowls. "No offense, Tris. Sorry."

"Even F—" I cut myself off. That was almost a big slip. I _almost_ said, 'even Four was scrawny when he came here.' Telling my friends where he came from probably would've gotten me killed. Four would have been beyond mad. "Never mind."

"Well, you would be correct, Will," Tris grumbled. "Abnegation does not store up extra food, they do not have big meals, they don't eat much variety or fresh food, it's pretty much all from cans and the freezer. They don't have personal belongings, they don't have hobbies, heck, I don't even know when my birthday is." Christina gasps. Note to self: I'll have to see if I can get a leader to look it up for me—we need to fix this never-celebrated-a-birthday problem.

Will's just nodding along. "I know. I've looked into all that when I started noticing that the articles didn't make much sense. I believe you, Tris."

Usually Erudite just seem like know-it-alls, but maybe knowledge really can be what helps solve conflict. Maybe it's not so much one virtue that's right, but how you use it. Knowledge can be good if it's used to understand and help others. It's too bad that this has been my first opportunity to befriend an Erudite, or I might have understood that and paid more attention in school. Oh well, too late now.

I try to buy peace by sharing my Dauntless cake with Tris—something I _never_ share because it's the very best thing in the world. My love affair with Dauntless chocolate cake has a long, deep history. By the time we've finished our cake, the rest of our friends have wandered off. "Look, Tris," I start with a sigh. "I totally get why you're mad at Four. He's damn near perfect aim with throwing knives and you expected not to get cut, then he did it on purpose." Tris scrunches her face into a scowl. "But seriously, you left him no choice. We're training to be soldiers here. You can't just not follow an order."

Tris exhales a deep breath. "Yeah, you're right," she concedes. "He was taunting me the whole time, though. Calling me 'Stiff', asking if I was 'about done yet'… he just made me mad."

"Well, sometimes Four can be kind of a jerk," I laugh. "I don't pretend to understand him, most of the time." This earns me a chuckle. "On another note, with you doing things like standing in front of targets for your friends, I can _totally_ see why you thought you were too selfish for Abnegation." I exaggerate the accompanying eyeroll, and Tris playfully punches me in the arm.

I wrap an arm around Tris's tiny waist.

"Maybe he was just reminding you to be brave. You're used to trying to be selfless, maybe protecting others makes you braver."

Tris thinks for a moment. "Maybe," she admits. "Maybe selflessness and bravery aren't all that different."

* * *

That night after dinner, Will is still on my mind as I think about the lights on at Erudite. Maybe he's trustworthy enough to ask about it.

My knuckles rap against Four's apartment door at 7:35, Tris uncomfortably fidgeting next to me, biting her lip. "Stop that," I say, running my thumb across her bottom lip to free it. "When you bite your lip it's really hard for me to resist kissing you." The door, of course, opens on the words "kissing you", with my hand near Tris's lips, me standing very near her. Four looks at us, jaw dropped, eyebrows furrowed. He looks slightly pained as he waves us in. I know he likes her, and I'm kicking myself—I didn't mean to rub it in his face that Tris and I are getting on so well.

I stop myself from grabbing Tris's hand on my way in, and she follows me, once again hopping up onto the kitchen counter while Four and I sit in the chairs at the table.

"So," Four begins, "is this about your divergence, or something else?"

"Both," Tris pipes up. Her heels tap against the lower cabinets as she swings her legs back and forth. "So let's start by talking about the fear simulations. Are we going to be able to go through your fear landscape to practice? When does stage two start?"

Four puts his head in his hands and sighs. He pinches the bridge of his nose, as if we're giving him a headache. "Yeah," he finally concedes, dragging his hands down his face. "We'll get Zeke to help us out with it too. He'd do anything to keep Uri safe so I am sure we can trust him." He's right. Zeke is truly a good brother. Ever since Dad died—we were only five and seven—he's taken more responsibility than a child should ever have to, but as a result, we're very close. "Stage two starts in four days."

"Okay," I continue, "the other thing was something we saw from the Ferris wheel last night." I hop on the counter next to Tris. Our hands are touching as they rest on the counter's edge, but not overlapping. Just that tiny bit of contact sends enough butterflies that it's hard to concentrate on the very important topic at hand.

"Erudite headquarters had its lights on," Tris says. "Bright. And it was like two in the morning."

Four rubs the back of his neck. The corners of his lips turn down into a frown. "I was out late a couple weeks ago and saw that, too. Apparently they think they're so special that they don't have to follow the city ordinances." He sighs. "They're all working through the night, it looked like, when I tried to check it out. I didn't want to get too close and have someone notice me, though. So I've been wondering what they could be working on. I've also been watching what's going on around here from the control room, and Jeanine Matthews makes an appearance here quite often. She's always meeting with Max and Eric."

Well, that's odd. Why would an Erudite leader be here frequently? Leaders don't usually work too closely with other factions, they definitely don't typically have frequent visits and meetings like that. "It sounds like something big is going on," I murmur.

"Yeah, well, this past week I've been taking up some evening shifts there, after training, to keep an eye on things. Two things you should know about me—I'm naturally suspicious of people," –that much was obvious from practically the first time meeting Four—"and I'm unexpectedly good with computers." This is true. I know Four must not have gotten much computer experience in Abnegation, and I've seen him in the control room—he looks like he's been working with codes and such his whole life. "I've hacked into Eric's computer and found emails from Erudite. Supply lists. Maps."

"Supply lists? Maps?" Tris looks as confused as I feel.

Four nods. "Serums, ammo, guns. Enough to arm all of Dauntless. And maps—" he pauses for a deep, dramatic breath "—of Abnegation."

Ammo and guns to arm the whole faction, and maps of Abnegation, and Erudite… no… "They're planning a war."

Realization and shock cross Tris's face. Wide-eyed, she slowly voices what we all understand this means. "They're planning a war on Abnegation." Her parents. Her parents are there. Her dad is even on the council, I think. "Erudite wants control of the government, they're planning a war, and they're planning to use Dauntless as their soldiers."

"How do they expect to get us to cooperate, though?" I ask. I, for one, certainly wouldn't agree to just go annihilate a faction to give a different faction government control. The Abnegation run the government because they are selfless and considered incorruptible; but also because of that selflessness, they absolutely will not fight back. It would go against everything they believe in. They'd just stand there and let us shoot them dead. We are supposed to protect people, and this would be a massacre.

"That's what I can't figure out." Four shakes his head.

Whatever is being planned, obviously we need to do something. Find more info, figure out their plan, stop it. Warn the Abnegation. Something. And we'll need help if we're going to stop it. "I think we should bring Zeke in on this," I slowly say. "And Will."

Tris's and Four's heads snap toward me. Four says, "Will is Erudite, Uriah. How can we trust him when we're trying to save Abnegation _from_ Erudite?"

"He doesn't agree with all that crap from Erudite," I argue. "Remember Tris? We were just talking about this at lunch. There's no way Will would agree with this, and he might know enough more about what's been happening in Erudite to help figure this out."

"Okay, maybe…" she looks at her hands like they're the most interesting thing she's ever seen, then looks up. "We need to let my parents know, though, and Marcus. My dad works closely with him and he's the head of the whole government."

Four… goes pale? What's his deal? "You okay, man? You look… not thrilled with the idea of going to Abnegation." It couldn't have been _that_ bad growing up there, could it? We're only talking about an hour or two visit to Tris's parents' house, it's not like we're going on a long vacation there.

Four studies his fingers, picking at his cuticles. Tris and I exchange a puzzled look. Four sighs. "Yeah, you're right, we'll have to, but I'd prefer to just talk with Tris's parents and no one else if we can." He finally looks up and meets my eyes, then Tris'. "Come on." He's up grabbing his jacket and halfway to the door and I have no idea what he's planning on us doing right now, or where he's going. Four looks back at me and I raise an eyebrow; he seems to finally realize that we can't read his thoughts.

"We're going into my fear landscape."


	11. Chapter 11

**I do not own Divergent or its characters.**

Chapter 11

"We're all just going to do my fear landscape together." Four pulls out two black boxes, each has a couple syringes filled with an orange liquid. "I don't show this to anyone, and you won't tell anyone that you've seen this or anything about what you see in here, got it?" He's got the most intimidating presence, I don't even know how to describe it.

The three of us are standing outside the fear landscape room. When Tris had suggested talking to her parents and Marcus Eaton, Four had visibly paled, which seemed odd. After being silent a few minutes he'd abruptly said that he trusted both of us and needed us to understand something, then led us here.

Four goes on to explain about how the serum does something or other to some part of your brain where you process fear, blah blah blah. I don't really care how it works, just what it does. "During your fear simulations in stage two," he continues, and this sounds like time to tune back in, "you aren't supposed to be aware that you're in a simulation. Like the aptitude test, you will be aware, you'll know it's not real. You also might be able to create objects or otherwise manipulate the simulation. If you do that, it will be obvious that you're… different." After explaining how to get out of a sim—face the fear, or calm your breathing and heart rate—and that all his fears will show up here, from the mildest fear progressively worse, he injects us each in the neck. Apparently the computer controls whose fears we go into, so we can all go in together, all aware of it being a sim, and each other.

We step into the fear landscape room. "See if you can figure out why they call me Four." Oh yeah, Tris probably doesn't know how Four got his nickname.

 _Click._ The door latches shut, and we are left in total darkness. Tris grabs my hand.

"What's your real name?" she asks Four. Ha! He's been asked that in countless truth or dare games and not once has he answered. There's no way he's telling us.

"See if you can figure that out too."

I'm definitely intrigued now, but I don't have time to think about it as the simulation pulls us under. In the blink of my eyes, the room transforms into Four's first fear. We are outside. The sky is bright blue the city sprawls below us; we are high on a skyscraper's rooftop. Who would have guessed that one of his fears could be something as common as heights? Obviously, neither Tris nor I share this fear with Four.

Even over the strong wind I can hear Four's heavy breathing. His eyes are the roundest I've ever seen them. He's terrified. "There's no door," I observe. "So what, we jump?"

Four shakes his head. "If this were the final test," he gasps, "the fear landscape, yes you could face your fear and jump. But what if you thought that this was real, like you should, but won't, in stage two. What would a Dauntless do if this were real?"

"Try to climb down," Tris suggests. Four nods, his eyes closed, clinging to the metal tower behind him.

I add, "yeah, there are ledges above and below the windows, so we could use those."

"We're not going to do that right now," he says. "You just need to practice figuring out the right strategy, which you just did. But one more thing. Sometimes you can manipulate the sim, like I could think 'there's a door behind me' and—" a door appears behind him out of nowhere. Wow, that is cool! "—it will give you a way out. Or it could be a gun, or whatever. But you never, ever do that." Lame. "The wrong person sees that and you'll find yourself at the bottom of the chasm. Dauntless don't create doors or guns in their sims." Okay, note to self, absolutely don't manipulate sims. Got it. Scared straight.

"Okay then," I clap my hands together, "let's jump and move on to the next one." Tris holds both my hand and Four's, counts to three, and we jump. My stomach is in my throat as we free fall, accelerating toward the ground, until as we near it the scene changes and we're back in total darkness. I try to step back but a wall stops me. Tris is in front of me slapping a wall in front of her.

"Confinement," Four groans. Tris moves toward him and as she does, the box shrinks to close the empty space.

"What do we do in this one?" I ask. "Just calm down so the computer moves on?" I can barely see him nod. He does not seem at all calm. This could take a while.

Four groans, hiding his eyes in his crossed arms. "OK, if this were really a fear simulation where you were not supposed to be aware, what would you do?"

"I'd try to force it open first," I start, "and of course would fail."

Tris nods. "Then I'd check all around for any sort of tool… of course, not creating anything."

I add, "and at that point I think my only option would be to calm myself down, right?"

"Yep, good," Four mumbles into his hands. He's nearly panting. Again… who would have guessed clausterphobia would be one of his only _four_ fears?! I don't think I'd have liked being friends with him as a kid. Those fears rule out a lot of fun things. I guess seeing how much these fears really do affect him, it's pretty amazing that he acts in spite of fear so well—there are tons of high places you could easily fall from in everyday life in the Dauntless compound, and he just goes about his day, ignoring his fear, every single day. Acting in the midst of fear, not letting fear control you—that's real bravery.

"So I guess you might not be a big fan of hide and go seek, Four?" I joke. "I always hid in cabinets or the coat closet."

"Me too, when I was little enough to be allowed to play games," Tris agrees. "I'd hide behind the winter coats."

"I never played hide-and-go-seek." Four's voice was scratchy.

"Where does this fear come from, Four?" Tris asks. "Maybe talking about it will help us somehow."

"Okay… um…" Tris grabs Four's hand and puts it at the top of her chest so he can feel her deep breaths and match them. "This one is from my fantastic childhood. Childhood punishments. The tiny closet upstairs." Damn. I'm just realizing how little any of us really know about Four. I don't think even Zeke knows stuff like this about Four. "I don't really want to talk about it anymore," he groans.

"Ask us something, then," I suggest.

"Okay," he laughs but it sounds forced. "Why is your heart racing, Tris?" Well now mine has picked up a bit too… apparently his hand is still on her chest. My cheeks burn.

"Well, I…" Tris stammers, "I am in a very small, dark space with two very attractive boys…" Embarrassed, Tris buries her face in her hands. I'm glad she can't see how widely I'm grinning right now, and Four lets out a genuine laugh, the kind where even though I can hardly see him, I can tell he's grinning as wide as I am. The wooden box we've been trapped in bursts apart as if the laugh itself were a sledgehammer.

We all straighten and I don't see anything, but Four's eyes are wide. Someone appears beside him, pressing a gun to Four's head. But the fear isn't fear for his _own_ life. I follow his gaze, turning to see behind me. A girl dressed in all white sits placidly in a chair. Between us and the girl is a small table with a gun on it. "Who is she?" asks Tris.

"An innocent," Four says.

"You have to shoot her," I state flatly. This fear is about his capacity to harm someone innocent, and about having to do something against his beliefs.

Four nods as he picks up and aims the gun. His hands are steady, but his eyes are pained. "Sometimes, as a Dauntless soldier, you have to follow orders you don't necessarily agree with." He closes his eyes and turns his head away. "But I can never do it unless I look away."

 _Bang!_ Red spreads from the bullet hole, staining the girl's white dress, and she slumps lifelessly to the side, then vanishes. Strangely, I know this is the third of his four fears, but he still didn't have much trouble with that one. It hardly even seemed like he was afraid.

"Here we go," whispers Four. We're in a dark, plain room, standing in the center of a circle of light. A figure lurks ahead of us in the darkness. I glance at Four and he looks so utterly terrified, I don't even mind that he's hanging onto Tris's hand for dear life. The figure draws closer and my breathing picks up a bit waiting to see what, or who, haunts Four in his nightmares.

The figure steps into the light. It's a man in gray Abnegation clothes. He's tall, his hair is Abnegation short, and his hands are joined behind his back. I'm about to ask who he is when Tris inhales a sharp breath.

"Marcus," she whispers. What? This guy does look familiar though… I feel like I should know him…

Four's voice shakes. "Here's the part where you figure out my name."

Abnegation. Government. Marcus. _Marcus Eaton._ I finally got it. He's the head of the whole government. Wait so… "Is Marcus Eaton…?" I trail off.

"Marcus had a son, who joined Dauntless," Tris says slowly. Then her voice is barely a whisper. "Tobias." Tobias Eaton.

I don't pay much attention to current events, I don't read the paper. But Tobias Eaton, son of Marcus Eaton, Abnegation… I've heard that name. The Erudite were releasing articles… about exactly what's about to happen next, because Marcus has unbuckled his belt and is pulling it out of his pants belt loops.

It's obvious what's going to happen, especially when I see Four. He _cowers,_ and it's so unlike him, my jaw drops. He may go about his day as if he isn't afraid of the height of every path in the Pit, but this fear, the fear this monster of a 'father' has literally beaten into him, it has him paralyzed. I lean in right next to him, with my arm around his shoulder to help keep his attention, and my mouth near his ear. "Four." I'm surprised by how serious and commanding my own voice is. "You're Dauntless. You're one of the bravest people I know and you can act in the face of this fear. What would a Dauntless do right now, Four?" His looks at me and blinks his eyes into focus, and I repeat my question. "What does a Dauntless do?" Four has come back to reality not a moment too soon.

"This is for your own good," he says, and as we are surrounded by a dozen of his clones, all their eyes black pits and all their fingernails looking like claws, all twelve raising the belt in the air.

Four begins to straighten, gaining some inner strength, as Marcus brings down the belt, and he's almost fully straightened up when Tris jumps in front of him, blocking the belt with her arm, wincing as the leather wraps around her wrist. Her jaw is tense as she grits her teeth against the hot stinging pain, and I grab the belt as Four lunges at Marcus, throwing a series of punches and kicks that are obviously just to work out some of his anger, before knocking him out with a powerful punch to the temple.

As soon as he falls unconscious, we find ourselves back in the fear landscape room. I'm sure not calm yet though. I'm pissed. Like I'd like to hop a train to Abnegation and beat the shit out of that pansycake right now. Who does that to their _child?!_ My parents spanked us a few times, but that's some firm pats on the butt, not a fucking belt whipping! And the childhood punishments in the closet. No wonder Four is so quiet and private, his childhood was hell… and our head government official is a sick monster.

"That's it? Why do you only have four…" Tris trails off. "Oh. That's why they call you Four." Four looks awestruck, I guess that anyone ever bothered stick up for him. Four, _the legendary Four,_ who I've rarely seen touch anyone let alone hug them, abruptly wraps an arm tightly around each of us. Can this night get any weirder?

I awkwardly pat his back. Tris quietly says, "Hey, we got through it."

"You faced him, Four. That was bravery. Totally Dauntless." And I mean it.

Four steps back and locks eyes with Tris for a few seconds too long before glancing at me then looking down, scratching the back of his neck. Yeah, I really didn't like that little interaction at all. Though we haven't defined our relationship, just kissed a few times, so maybe I don't have much right to an opinion here.

I hope no one has any more new world-altering info to share, because then my head just might explode.


	12. Chapter 12

**As always, Divergent and its characters are the property of Veronica Roth.**

Chapter 12

I stare into the mirror, checking my curly dark hair one more time. Today is Visiting Day.

For Dauntless-born, Visiting Day is just a day with our families. Don't get me wrong—I'm really looking forward to time with my mom and Zeke. We're closer than most families, I think, and while I've gotten to see Zeke here and there, I have barely caught a glimpse of Mom since Choosing Day over a week ago. Usually, every Sunday we have dinner at home and then take turns choosing a game to play. Like a card game or dice game usually. I didn't get to do that last weekend, and probably won't tomorrow (today is Saturday), and I'm especially excited, but also nervous, because I intentionally set up today so that we'd mostly be doing an early dinner and games thing so that I could invite a certain transfer initiate to come along without interrupting her time with her family.

Which brings me back to my obsession with my hair this morning. I want to make a good impression on Tris's family if they come. I hope they'll come. Especially since we'll need their help stopping this war or at least minimizing the damage.

Tris is already in the hall when I step out of the restroom. Her shiny, long blonde hair is pulled back in an Abnegation bun, just like I always saw it at school all those years. I can't stop myself from looking her up and down. She looks amazing in those black skinny jeans and fitted black t-shirt, and totally badass in her black combat boots. Her whole face lights up when she sees me, and I know mine reflects the same delight.

"Tris!" I call out, walking a little faster toward her, instantly wrapping my arm around her waist when I reach her. She used to tense up at first when I'd do this, but today she stays relaxed—she's getting a lot more comfortable with me. More Dauntless. I lean down a bit to kiss her cheek before pulling her into an empty hallway.

We sparred after Four's fear landscape the night before last, but we each kind of just spent time with our own friends yesterday and only saw each other at meals. It feels like every second she's not with me, I'm just searching for her, hoping for at least a glimpse, but I know that if I don't make a point of spending time with my friends, I'll lose them, and they've been there for me forever. If things go south with Tris, they'll be the ones to pick up the pieces. So yesterday was spent with Marlene and Lynn, then a couple beers by the chasm with Eli and Gabe. I'm thankful I had the sense to stop after two last night or the hangover I'd be nursing this morning would make me a lot less likely to make a good impression. But two beers isn't enough to bother me the next day. Not even really enough for a buzz.

I The hallway is narrow, dimly lit, and appears to be rarely used. My hands find her waist and I push her, gently but firmly, into the wall. My body is inches from hers and I lean my forehead against hers, staring into her eyes for a moment before stealing a kiss. This kiss is slow and tender, and not too long. Our foreheads lean against each other again as I close my eyes and reach deep inside me to gather my nerves, searching for that confidence I've always had, but seems to disappear when she's near me.

"Tris," I breathe, then finally open my eyes. I get caught in her gaze for a moment before I continue. "Your family might be here today." I close my eyes again before getting the next sentence out. "I wondered if maybe you'd want to introduce me as your boyfriend?" I'm afraid to open my eyes, and it feels like my lungs are stuck, not letting any air in or out.

Then I feel her lips against mine, and I kiss back without any hesitation, opening my eyes when she pulls away. "I'd love to, Uri," she whispers with a shy smile. Then she smirks, "will I meet your mother today, too? And how will I be introduced?"

I grin, "yes, I'd like you to come to dinner, and I'll be honored to introduce you as my gorgeous, kind, smart, brave, utterly amazing girlfriend. I'm sure you'll use similar adjectives to describe me when I meet your parents, of course."

Her smile falters. "If they come."

"If they don't come, they're crazy. Who would ever pass up an opportunity to spend time with you, Trissy?"

* * *

Visiting Day is always strange. Everyone in Dauntless wears black, so it is a little like being in an alternate universe every year when Visiting Day comes around and the Pit is filled with color. Lots of Erudite blue and Candor black-and-white; a little Amity red and yellow, though Amity doesn't often transfer here (a lot more often than Abnegation, though). We don't have any Amity transfers this year but families usually continue to visit for a few years after the kids transfer, and then those connections usually seem to fall away.

Tris and I are searching for Abnegation gray. Her hand is beginning to sweat in mine and I know she's nervous that they didn't come. But suddenly her face lights up, though I can still see in her eyes that she's very nervous. "I see my mom!" Tris points and I finally see the splash of gray, too. I can't see her well from here. "Let me go say hi to her for a minute before you join us." A moment later, my hand goes cold as she lets go and hurries away.

Delicate, cold hands cover my eyes and I hear, "guess who?" The voice is way too sweet to be Lynn, so the most likely candidate is… "Marlene?"

She removes her hands and bounces around so she's in front of me face to face, before giving me a hug. Lynn appears next to her. "Where's your mom?"

"Oh, we have plans for later. I'm going to meet Tris's parents after she gets a few minutes with them."

Lynn raises her eyebrows. And as much as she tries to hide it, I don't miss the flash of sadness and jealousy that crosses Marlene's face. I have suspected for a while that she might want to be more than friends, but I just don't think of her that way. I love her more like a sister. "Where are your families?"

"Well, I still see more than enough of Shauna, but Hector and my parents should be here soon." Lynn sounds bored with the whole thing. I'm sure her sister Shauna, who is also Zeke's girlfriend, will be around any minute along with Lynn's brother and parents.

"I'm going home around lunch time," Marlene says.

"Oh there's Hec! I'll see you when they reveal the rankings, Uri." Lynn is off to meet her family. Marlene mumbles something about getting some breakfast and walks off, so I guess now is the time to go meet the parents.

My feet are so heavy, like bone and flesh has been replaced with lead, as I trudge across the pit. What if they don't like me? What if they think I'm not smart enough or not brave enough or, more likely, not selfless enough for their daughter? I'm not _really_ looking at who I'm walking up to as I trudge toward the figure in gray standing with my girlfriend – I love that, that I can call her that now—until they're right in front of me.

I intended to start this meeting with a very charming lopsided grin, but instead it's with wide eyes and a dropped jaw. Because when I finally look at her, I realize I've met Mrs. Prior before. Not even two weeks ago. She's the stiff lady who administered my aptitude test. The one whose name I didn't bother to try and remember.

"Mom, this is my boyfriend, Uriah," Tris says nervously. She looks at me and cocks an eyebrow, asking me what's wrong. "Uriah, this is my mother."

I poke Tris in the side and grin. "That introduction was weak. What about all the flattering adjectives we talked about introducing me with?" Tris blushes and Mrs. Prior laughs.

"So nice to see you again, Uriah." Mrs. Prior's smile is kind and not showing any signs that she might be upset about our relationship, so there's that at least. "Call me Natalie."

"Nice to see you again, Natalie, though I never thought I would." Her handshake is strong for a Stiff. Handshakes are a Dauntless greeting; Stiffs barely touch, so they just nod their heads at each other in greeting. I turn to Tris, knowing she's very confused right now. "Your mother administered my aptitude test."

Tris's eyes are round as saucers in shock at the connection. "Oh! Well, um… Mom, Uriah's been helping me out from the start, he's been very good to me. His brother, too."

"Thank you for looking out for Beatrice, Uriah. I've been worried, I know Dauntless has a tough initiation."

"Well, she's doing well," I reassure her. Tris shakes her head. "Yeah you are, Tris. You're doing better than you think. Four even stopped me the other day and told me so." I turn back to Natalie. "My older brother Zeke and I have been training her for the fighting since her first night here." Natalie looks slightly confused.

"Four is the name of my instructor," Tris explains. "And he's also best friends with Uriah's brother, Zeke."

"You'll probably meet him soon here…" I glance around to see if I can spot Four. "Anyway. I'm sure you miss your daughter, because who wouldn't miss her? But I've liked her for a long time in school and I'm very glad that she's here at Dauntless."

Natalie leans in and whispers something to Tris, causing her to blush even brighter than before. She's so cute when she blushes.

Tris begins to lead Natalie around and introduce her to Christina and Will, while I finally spot Four leaning against a railing and approach him. "Hey man." He turns to face me, leaning against the railing, his posture somewhat tense. "Don't worry, Marcus isn't here. The only Abnegation is Tris's mom." I can see his muscles release as he relaxes at the news that his bastard of a father isn't here.

"I usually try to avoid coming to Visiting Day because of him, in case he might come. But I thought I should try to be around today since we'll need to meet the Priors soon anyway."

I mimic Four and lean against the railing next to him. When he transferred here, I was a good six inches shorter than him, but now we're the same height. It's funny how you don't realize how much you've grown until you notice how much you've changed compared to someone else. "Do you know them at all, from when you were growing up? The Priors, I mean?"

Four shrugged. "Sort of. Andrew works with my dad, so they came over for dinner sometimes, but I wasn't ever allowed to come down from my room and eat with them. I'd see them walking down the street though—I lived like six houses down from them. I'd never spoken to Tris till she came here. They always looked like the perfect little Abnegation family." He paused for a moment, and I followed his gaze to realize that he was watching the same thing I was—Tris talking to her friends. Getting in Will's sister's face, actually. Her mom has it handled, though. "Tris's mom, Natalie, though, I remember," Four suddenly adds. "Sometimes she was there when I volunteered feeding the factionless with my mother as a kid. She's very kind, that's all I really remember of her."

"I've met Natalie before today, too," I admit. "She administered my aptitude test."

Four raises his eyebrows, but doesn't ask me any more about it, because Tris and Natalie are headed toward us.

* * *

"That was weird. It was like my mom knew her way around. And the comment about the cake? And she seemed to know an awful lot about Dauntless initiation." Tris and I are laying on my bed in the dormitory; we wanted some time together before going to my mom's.

"Her handshake was a lot more confident than I'd expect, too," I murmured. "Are you sure she was Abnegation born? She even checked for cameras." After meeting Four, Natalie had pulled Tris and me into a secluded hallway to a spot out of view of any of the security cameras that are present throughout the Dauntless compound. Most people don't even notice them, but I do since my brother and Four work in the control room and have taught me to look for them. She'd also told Tris to have a slice of the chocolate cake for her—the woman's got good taste! She warned us about stage two, but we were able to reassure her than Four had that covered and we knew what to do. We didn't get to tell her much at all about our war concerns but we did make a plan to meet with her and Mr. Prior in a few days.

"Cameras? I never even thought of that." We lay in silence for a moment, just listening to each other's breaths. For once no one else is in here. Tris fits so perfectly pressed against my side, her head on my chest. I absentmindedly play with her hair; I had pulled the pins out as soon as we cuddled up here. Abnegation buns just don't suit her. Beatrice wears buns, but Tris is way too fierce for them.

Tris sighs. "I guess we never talked about my parents' childhoods. We don't talk about ourselves in Abnegation. I guess I never realized how little I know about my parents." I didn't know my dad very well, but it seems sad to go your whole life not knowing much about your own parents. "Do you think she was Dauntless?"

"It seemed that way," I answer.

We're both silent again. I look down at her face. Tris seems deep in thought, kind of staring into space. I wish that we could just be, and have fun, and not have the danger of our divergence and the imminent war darkening our thoughts. I just want to enjoy being together. "Let's just forget the world for a while, Tris. It can be just us here. No worries for a little while."

Tris smiles, though it doesn't reach her eyes. "I would like that." We turn more toward each other and just stare into each other's eyes. I don't know if I leaned in or if she did, or maybe we both did, but before long our lips met, our hands found each other's faces and hair, and finally, Tris and I were all that existed in the world. Just for a little while.

* * *

"Oh, my baby, I've missed you!" My mother's arms wrap around me and I hug back, but really? Did she _have_ to call me her 'baby'?! I got a girl here, damn it! Oh well, guess she may as well know from the start that I'm a Momma's Boy.

"You too, Mom."

I pull Tris forward from where she's practically hiding behind me and snake my arm around her waist. "Mom, this is Tris, my beautiful, smart, brave, amazing girlfriend." I wiggle my eyebrows at Tris and she can't hold back a laugh.

"You're much better at remembering the 'flattering adjectives' than I am, I guess, Uriah." Tris turns to Mom. "It's nice to meet you, Mrs. Pedrad."

"Hana," Mom corrects her. "Zeke has mentioned you, says you're a quick learner. And you were an Abnegation transfer, is that right?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Well, I'm so glad you could join us today. Zeke tells me he's never seen Uriah so nervous around a girl," Mom laughs.

 _You've got to be kidding me._ I wouldn't have invited her if I'd known that they'd changed Visiting Day to 'Humiliate Uriah Pedrad Day'. Oh well, I'll just have to pretend I'm not embarrassed. "Shh Mom," I say with a grin, "you keep that up and she'll catch on to how much I like her."

Tris blushes scarlet. Mom waves me off and heads to the kitchen to continue cooking—one of my favorites, lasagna—and I lean down before Tris can follow, my mouth nearly touching her ear. "You are very cute when you blush," I whisper.

I offer a very short tour of the rather small apartment I grew up in, ending in my bedroom. Tris looks almost fascinated by my things—snapshots, toys, sports equipment, art supplies. I sit on my old bed, twirling my dad's throwing knife. I keep it in my bedside drawer; I don't have much of him to hold onto, so this is my most prized possession. Tris sits next to me with a sketchbook in her hands. My sketchbook. "You have so many things… we didn't have toys or pictures or paints in Abnegation. All considered self-indulgent." She sighs and holds up the sketchbook. "Can I look?"

I nod, but I'm so nervous what she'll think about my artwork. Drawing is mostly something I do by myself, one of my only hobbies that doesn't involve a lot of movement. There are only a few people who've seen any of my artwork. Outside of my family, just Marlene, and one other person: my first girlfriend, Alison. She is a year younger than me, so she isn't in our initiation class. But I got hurt, and I haven't trusted anyone enough to share this part of me since.

The sketchbook Tris has just opened is one I've been using for maybe the last six months, and it's almost full now. I'm hoping she'll get bored with it before too long because there is one in the back I'd rather not show her today. She's just a few pages in right now, so, fingers crossed. Tris admires each page as she flips through, studying the drawings—a broken carousel horse; Dauntless flames; Lynn looking totally pissed off, as usual; a slice of Dauntless chocolate cake. Random stuff.

"Oh! This one is your tattoo!" She has stopped at my drawing of a snake, the sketch I took to Tori when I got my first tattoo a few months ago.

"Yeah, I like to draw, and I might want to become a tattoo artist after initiation. I don't often show people my art. Mom always says I'm talented but… I don't know..." Tris's gaze snaps up to my face, her eyebrows raised and eyes wide open. "Anyway, she wouldn't let me get at tattoo before choosing unless I designed it myself and got her approval on everything first."

Tris shakes her head. "You always seem so sure of yourself. I can't believe you don't think your artwork is good! It's beautiful."

I know this line is cheesy as hell, but meh, I'm a cheesy kind of guy. "Not as beautiful as you are." She rolls her eyes but I lean in anyway. The sketchbook drops to the floor, I don't look to see where it fell open to. My fingers tangle in her hair as my lips mold to hers. She deepens the kiss and I slowly lean her back onto the bed, hovering over her, resting my weight on one elbow. Her tongue grazes my lower lip. My heart is pounding as our tongues explore each other and I press myself closer against her, sliding my hand slowly down her side. Her hands run under my shirt, slowly up my back, leaving a trail of heat in their wake. I kiss down her neck and god, she smells good… like vanilla and fresh air.

Again I capture her lips with my own, kissing her passionately, as I play with the hem of her shirt. My hand slips under the fabric. I am not thinking about what I'm doing, I'm lost in the moment as my hand caresses her skin. I don't even notice how much higher my hand has moved until she pushes it back down to her waist.

"I'm sorry," I mumble against her lips. "I wasn't thinking." She just kisses me again and I flip us over, scooting up toward the headboard as I do, Tris straddling me. She looks shocked so I pull away from the kiss.

"I know this is new for you, Tris. I don't want to move too fast. I don't want to do anything you're uncomfortable with. I don't mind waiting-" Tris silences me with her lips on mine, her hands running through my curly hair. She's pressed against me, her shirt riding up and leaving several inches of exposed skin, my hands under her shirt, ghosting over her back. Tris's lips are on my neck when the door bursts open immediately after a very short knock.

In the doorway, gaping at the position he's found Tris and I in, is Four.


	13. Chapter 13

_Merry Christmas! Sorry for the delay in updating. It's been a busy couple weeks. If you have ideas of what you think should happen please feel free to share! And of course the usual disclaimer: I do not own Divergent or its characters._

 **Chapter 13**

"Why'd you have to send Four in earlier?! I didn't even know he was coming over. Tris and I were in the middle of… something… when he came in." Zeke and I decided some bro time was in order after dinner, and are now sitting on his couch, each with a beer in hand.

Zeke chuckles. "Better him than Mom, right?"

"Um, no. I'm pretty sure Mom doesn't have a crush on my girlfriend," I grumble. "Why didn't you come get us yourself?!"

Zeke almost spits out his mouthful of beer. "Hold up, hold up! _Four_ has a crush on Tris?" I give him the 'well, duh, idiot' look but he still looks totally bewildered. "I've never known Four to have much interest in any girl in particular. Are you sure he's got a thing for her?"

Zeke is not very observant, I guess. "Yeah, I'm sure," I answer, shaking my head. "Given that _I_ liked her before she even jumped into the net—long before that, if I'm being real—I definitely _notice_ the way your scary Stiff buddy looks at my girl. And I'd rather not have dug the knife in deeper by having him walk in on me full on making out with her. You should have seen the look on his face."

Zeke shakes his head. "Sorry, man. I didn't know. No wonder he left so early." I down the last of my beer and pop the cap off another. For once I had thought ahead and brought an extra to the coffee table so I wouldn't have to get up.

"So." Zeke takes another swig of beer. "You and Tris are officially _together_ now, huh? And what do you mean, you liked her long before she jumped into the net?"

I never admitted to myself that I liked Tris until she transferred here, but deep down, I know I was interested in her well before that. "Yes, we are. And… well… I never thought a lot about it because she was a Stiff, and they hardly ever transfer, and certainly not to Dauntless, so it seemed like there was no point." I scratch the back of my neck as I focus on a piece of lint on the floor. "But yeah, I've liked her for a while… probably a year. She's different." I look up finally. Zeke's eyebrows are furrowed, his mouth is a thin straight line. Like he's trying to figure something out.

Finally Zeke breaks into a grin. "You really like her. Congrats, baby bro. You seem good for each other."

I stare at my beer. There are a lot more serious things than girls that we'll need to talk about soon. "There are some things Tris and I have in common… something I haven't told you about yet but you'll need to know," I finally say. I can feel his stare boring into me. I may as well just tell him the story from the start. "Tris and I first hung out the day of the aptitude test. We both left early that day, I saw her walking away and suspected that she was leaving early for the same reason I was."

Zeke shakes his head. "What are you talking about Uri? Left early? I know you skipped plenty of classes but I doubt the Stiff ever ditched out on school in her life."

I laugh a little, "yeah, I asked to borrow her notes so many times after I cut that the last few months Tris had started just making a second set anytime she noticed I was missing from class, to give me the next day."

Zeke laughs, shaking his head, before looking at me expectantly. I look down for a minute. I can trust Zeke, right? I mean he's my brother. Four even thinks it's okay to tell him. And we need him to help us stop the war, so he'll need to know the truth. I may as well tell him about Tris, too, because he'll find out in the next few days anyway. I sigh. "Tris and I were both told to go straight home and say we were sick. Because the test didn't work on us. We're both divergent."

Zeke's eyes are wide, full of shock and fear. He apparently knows about divergents even if I didn't really.

"Say something, Zeke. Please tell me you're scared _for_ me, not scared _of_ me."

Zeke shakes his head vigorously. "I'm not afraid of you, Uri. You're the same person you were before that test. I'm definitely scared _for_ you, though."

"Well," I say, "Tori administered Tris's test so we knew we could trust her. She directed us to Four."

"Four?!"

"Yes, Four. He's the one who would be giving us the fear sims anyway, I heard Lauren doesn't do them. I think that might be Four's choice so he can help out the divergent initiates."

"Well, I'll have to thank him, then."

"Yeah, well, there's more." I chug the last bit of my beer. "I don't know how to explain it all, and I don't have time anyway because I need to get to the dormitory for the stage one rankings. But some serious shit is gonna go down soon and we need to stop it. We're going to need your help."

* * *

You could cut the tension in the dormitory with a knife. I didn't stay to explain about the war to Zeke because the rankings will be up, here in the dormitory, any minute.

We won't see our rankings against the transfer initiates' rankings until after the final test, but they still affect the cuts. Not everyone gets into Dauntless—only the ten best. There are twenty-one initiates in all, and four of them will be cut tonight. The rest that rank below tenth place will be cut after the final test in a few weeks. The ranks also determine our options for jobs—you choose in order of your ranking. As long as I'm in the top five in the end, I should be able to choose a decent job, like a government job, control room, or the one that's been in the back of my mind for a few years—tattoo artist.

I have nothing to worry about today; I haven't lost a single fight.

Marlene, however, is wringing her hands and fidgeting on her bunk. The bed sinks as I plop down next to her. "You look nervous."

Mar's attempt at a smile comes out more like a grimace. "Well, I didn't win every fight like you. I really don't want to be factionless, Uri," she snaps.

In mock defense, I raise my hands, palms out. "Hey, hey, it's okay, I understand why you're nervous. But you'll be fine. Out of five fights you won three, and came very close on a fourth. You're not going anywhere." I wrap an arm around her shoulders and quickly feel her relax against me, head leaning on my shoulder. "I can think of a few others who have a real reason to be worried."

Where is Lauren or Eric with our rankings? I could have stayed at Zeke's for another beer at this rate.

"So…" I sneak my arm from her shoulder and catch her by surprise by briefly attacking Mar's side in the spot I know she's hopelessly ticklish, then continue speaking after she falls off the bed with a loud squeal. " _When_ they finally come in with our rankings and we know for sure we're not getting cut, what should we do to celebrate?"

Marlene's got her signature mischievous glint in her eye. "Tattoos! Just you, me and Lynn, like it used to be."

My face falls. I love the tattoo idea, but there's no way I'm not including my Tris after she—and Zeke and I—have worked so hard to make sure she stays. I open my mouth to respond, but before any sound can escape, Eric struts in with Lauren trailing behind, chalkboard facing the wall so we can't see it. We rush forward with the other initiates and anxiously watch for him to turn the board around for us to see. After explaining what we all already understand about how the cuts work, Eric finally hands the board to Lauren, who turns it around and hangs it on the hook.

My eyes immediately find my name in the top slot before scanning the rest of the list.

Uriah

Lynn

Luke

Marlene

Gabe

Aiden

Kate

Aaron

Sarah

Rita

James

We won't get to see how we rank against the transfers other than at the very end of initiation, but the cuts are made based on that combined list we won't see. The bottom four initiates will be cut and live factionless, but that could mean four transfers, or four Dauntless-born, or any combination in between. My best friends and I are safe for now.

I turn around to see Lynn behind me, and grinning, we fist bump. "Way to go, number two!" I say as I sling an arm around her shoulder. "I mean, that's almost like being ranked first, since everyone knows that I'm in a class above the rest of you."

Lynn ducks out from under my arm and punches my shoulder. It probably _looked_ playful, but damn, that hurt! "Owwww," I whine as Marlene hugs me from behind. I congratulate her as well, but now I've really gotta go because I'm so anxious to see how Tris ranked and make sure that she's in no danger of being factionless. There are nine transfers, so she needs to rank at least fifth for there to be no possibility of her being cut.

But Marlene stops me. "Tattoos?"

"Oh… right…" Forgot about that. "I really can't exclude Tris celebrating the rankings. Can I bring her?"

Marlene looks disappointed. She fidgets her fingers and chews on her lower lip, looking at some indeterminate point to her right. "I guess," she sighs.

I think I'm going to be forced to deal with this Marlene liking me situation sooner or later, but it'll have to be later, because I want to see where Tris ranked. "Thanks, meet ya there," I call behind me as I jog out the door.

When I walk into the transfers' dormitory, they're all bunched near Four and the chalkboard, but kind of grouped together, they've already seen the rankings, and Molly, Peter's sidekick who Christina refers to as 'The Tank', looks _pissed,_ and Tris seems to be the target, as usual. Those Candor jerks are pansycakes _._ "—are going to pay for this." Molly doesn't hit Tris or anything, she doesn't explode, she just stomps out of the dormitory. Probably not a good sign. I am guessing that since Tris was initially ranked lower than Molly, then later beat Molly to a bloody pulp, that Molly is probably blaming Tris for ranking lower than she expected to.

Tris's gaze follows Molly until she's out of sight, and as usual, the look in her eyes give her away—Tris is worried about what Molly might do. I wrap an arm around her waist and peck her on the cheek; Tris responds with a grin and a chaste kiss to my lips. "Don't worry about her, Tris. You can take her, and you got the first-ranked Dauntless born to back you up!"

"You ranked first?" Will asks as he and Christina join us. "Congrats, man."

"Yeah, now I just need to see how you all did." I only need to take a few steps to be in view of the board.

Edward

Peter

Will

Tris

Christina

Molly

Drew

Al

Myra

Fourth! She is in fourth! My girl kicked some ass, I'm so proud of her! Scooping Tris up bridal style, which is crazy easy since she's light as a feather, I spin her around, then once she's on her feet I take both her hands in mine and jump up and down in excitement. It only takes a minute for her to burst out laughing at my crazy reaction and start to jump up and down with me.

"I am so proud of you, Babe! You worked so hard and look at that, fourth place, right between Will and Christina! Tris the badass, you're earning it!" She laughs and grins before wandering over to talk to Al, who is moping on his bunk. Al is a big guy, much bigger than me, and he's like a sledgehammer, just full of raw power. From what Will has told me, though, he doesn't want to hurt anyone so he's been throwing his fights. It looks like that will probably land him with a cut and a life with the factionless. I wonder why he chose Dauntless? He's too soft and kind. He probably would have fit in quite well in Amity.

"Peter was too quiet about those rankings," Christina murmurs. "I grew up with him, I know him. He's not going to be satisfied with second place."

I'm just glad that Tris isn't the one that's showed Peter up and ranked above him. The last thing she needs right now is a target on her back.

I focus again on Tris. "Let's celebrate the rankings! I told Marlene and Lynn I'd meet them at the tattoo parlour. Come with me?" I'm already grabbing her hand ready to go when she nods eagerly.

* * *

Apparently everyone had the same idea tonight: all of us have chosen to be tattooed with the Dauntless faction symbol. Lynn and I had it put at the back of our necks. Marlene is now in the other chair with Bud working on a faction symbol on her left upper arm while I hang out with Tris. The buzz of the tattoo needle muffles other conversation going on around the room as Tori tattoos Tris's left shoulder.

"I still can't believe I ranked fourth!" Tris squeals with an excited grin. "I am small and weak, I thought for sure I'd never be good enough."

"You may be small, but you make up for it in spirit, First Jumper," I tease, and Tori chuckles.

"Never would have believed when I met you at the aptitude test, drowning in gray clothes that were too big and trying to avoid looking at the mirrors, that you'd be this Dauntless," Tori smirks.

Tris laughs and I grin. "I knew," I say before leaning in for a soft kiss.

When I pull away and open my eyes, my gaze falls on Marlene, glaring at Tris. This just sucks. I wasn't really much interested in Mar in that way even before Tris came around. Really, though I never admitted it to myself, I always had a thing for the cute blond Abnegation I sat next to in school. Marlene is one of my best friends and I can't lose her… but I also can't just never date anyone because she likes me as more than a friend, because Tris or no Tris, I just don't like Marlene that way.

I'm not sure whether I should bring it up with Marlene and talk it out, or just pretend I don't notice her feelings. Just thinking about all this makes me feel irritated and tired, and I sigh aloud.

Tris cocks an eyebrow. "What's up?"

It's better not to tell her, right? I'm not sure if it's because it's the easy way or because it's really best, but I'm gonna go with that. "Nothing, babe. Just tired." She smiles slightly and I feel like I lied to her.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

I toss and turn. For some reason I just can't sleep well tonight at all. It's like my legs have this undeniable urge to move; the muscles are almost springing to action despite my brain saying that they need to calm the hell down and let me sleep. I press the button to turn on the blue backlighting on my watch. 1:26 AM. I've already fallen asleep and woken up three times tonight. I think, anyway. Really, I'm not sure I fell asleep at all. It was more like that in-between state where you're half aware of what's going on around you—which, here, is absolutely nothing but the quiet, even breathing of my fellow initiates—and halfway resting or maybe sort of sleeping. The kind of state where I have no real concept of time, but I know I'm not _really_ getting any sort of restful sleep. Good thing tomorrow's a day off.

The day after tomorrow, we're starting stage two: fear simulations. I'm nervous. Not of facing my fears, so much, but about hiding my divergence. What if I'm found out? Even just Eric and the other leaders being suspicious of Tris or me and keeping a closer eye on us would be bad for more than just us. We need to fly under the radar to stop the war, too. Seeing my mom yesterday seems to have added another dimension to that fear, because I have this strange anxiety in the back of my mind that maybe they'll hurt her and Zeke, too, if they find out that I'm divergent. How am I going to make it through the stress of fear simulations undetected when I'm already so stressed about everything else?

As I'm flipping from my back to my stomach once again, trying to clear my mind and get comfortable on this thin dormitory cot, a faint scream sends me jolting upright. I am almost certain it came from the transfers' dorm next door. Before I have time to think, I'm rolling out of bed. It's convenient that my bunk is so near the door; I don't bother pulling on a shirt or shoes, I'm out the door and into the dark hallway in a flash, running straight into a dark figure as it travels away from the transfer dorm in a sprint. I can make out a second dark figure but he just keeps going, leaving his accomplice behind. One sweep under the guy's legs and a quick punch to the temple and he's out; I leave him there looking like a big pile of dark blankets or something on the stone floor of the hallway and head to the source of the screams, both male and female now. Something terrible has clearly happened; these screams are ear-piercing screams of absolute panic and intense pain. Someone has flicked on the light and it casts a warm patch of yellow onto the stone floor of the hallway. I shiver a bit; it's cold underground, and I'm in nothing but a pair of basketball shorts. I don't even have socks or shoes on.

As I enter the transfer dormitory, my hand flies to shade my eyes against the sudden bright lights; I've been awake in the dark far too long to be able to see anything right when I enter the room. Once my eyes adjust and I see what's happened, I can feel blood draining from my face, and my stomach threatens to reject the dinner I ate several hours ago.

On the floor, with my Tris leaning over him on hands and knees, is Edward, the transfers' top ranked initiate, with a damn butter knife sticking out of his eye. Literally, out of his eye. It's been stabbed directly into his eyeball.

The bleeding is unbelievable; Tris is kneeling in a pool of Edward's blood, her waist long hair down loose with the ends of some of it soaked red with blood.

Blood is an odd color. It's so much darker than I ever expect it to be. When there's just a bit smeared on your skin, it's a bright red. But when it's a puddle like this, it's so dark it almost doesn't look red. I'm mesmerized by this for a moment before I snap out of it and realize I need to do something.

Glancing once at the motionless heap of cowardice in the hall to make sure he's still out, I hurry over to help Tris. Edward's girlfriend, Myra, is screaming her lungs out, completely hysterical. I don't blame her. If this were Tris on the floor I'd probably be almost as panicked. I tap Will's shoulder and point at Myra wordlessly before kneeling next to Tris, trying to reassure her by putting a hand on her shoulder. I can see in her eyes that she recognizes that I'm there, but she doesn't turn her attention from Edward for a moment.

Everyone is panicking, everyone looks like they're in shock. They are pretty much frozen in place, standing near their bunks around the room, wide-eyed, mouths gaping. All except Tris. She looks awake, focused, as if she was born to handle emergencies like this.

"Take it out!" Edward yells. "Get it out, get it out of me, get it out!"

Tris calmly shakes her head, then oddly laughs slightly. I guess it's just one of those situations where you can only either laugh or cry and she chooses not to cry. Her voice is calm and soothing. "No. You have to let the doctor take it out. Hear me? Let the doctor take it out. And breathe."

"It hurts." Edward is sobbing. Myra is still screaming but not as hysterically as before, as Will sits by her on a nearby bunk rubbing her back and speaking to her softly. I cast a meaningful look at Christina and when I catch her eye, she comes back to reality and moves across the room to help Will with Myra.

"I know it does." Tris's voice is strong and sure, but soft and soothing.

"Tris," I interject. "How can I help? Has anyone gone to get Four?" Tris shakes her head. "Will you be okay here while I run and get him?" I don't think any of the transfers besides Tris would have a clue where Four's apartment is, and they'd probably get lost anyway if I tried to describe how to get there.

"Go," she tells me, briefly looking away from Edward and into my eyes. Her eyes are bright, focused, fierce. She's got this. "Get Four. I can take care of Edward." As I stand and begin to sprint out of the dormitory, I hear her go back to cooing soothing words to Edward. It almost makes me feel jealous, which I fully realize is absolutely insane. How can I be jealous of the guy with a goddamn butter knife in his eye?

I'm only a few steps out of the dormitory when I nearly step on the guy I knocked out. He's still a pathetic heap on the cold stone floor, but I'm not sure he won't come to and make a run for it before I get back with Four. Someone's got to keep him here. "Al!" I yell. "Some help?"

As soon as I have Al keeping watch on the pansycake in the hallway, who turns out to be Peter's little minion, Drew, I begin again at a sprint and don't slow down until I'm just yards from Four's door. I pound incessantly until the door flies open. Four throws the door open in shorts and a black t-shirt, bleary eyed, squinting his eyes, his voice thick with sleep. "It better be damn important to wake me up in the middle of the night," he barks. Blinking, his eyes focus on me. "Uriah?"

"Yeah, it's important alright," I tell him. "Grab a jacket and some shoes, or you'll be freezing your ass off like me. Walk and talk." Four shoves his feet into sneakers without sitting down, grabbing a sweatshirt off a hook by the door. In seconds, we're headed back to the scene of the crime at a quick pace; I explain the situation on the way there.

We arrive a few moments after the medics, and Four helps them carry Edward to the infirmary, Myra trailing behind, hiccupping the tail end of her sobbing fit. Al's still out there with Drew; Four said he'd come back and deal with him as soon as Edward was dropped off. Tris stares blankly at the door for a moment after Four and the medics have disappeared with Edward. I wrap my arms around my trembling girlfriend, rubbing small circles on her back to comfort her as I survey the room. It's just Molly, Will, Christina, Tris, me and a big puddle of blood. Peter is predictably missing, and the rest are accounted for.

"You were amazing," I murmur in her ear. "I know you had to be scared but you kept it together and just… you were amazing." I'm rambling now. Oh well, it's like two in the morning. Most of the initiates are climbing back into bed. Somehow I didn't notice Peter slip back in, but he's climbing into bed now as if he didn't just partially blind someone for life.

Tris squeezes me a little then leans back. Silently, she fishes a towel out of the dirty laundry and begins soaking the blood up. I guess she's right, we can't leave it like this and apparently the rest of the initiates have no intention of helping, because they're all in bed again falling asleep, even with the lights on bright. I wander down the hall in search of the janitor's closet I remember being near the training rooms. Gathering a few cleaners, sponges, and a mop into an empty bucket, I roll the supplies back down the hall to the dormitory. I finish up Tris's cleaning project in here while Tris cleans herself up in the shower; she had blood all over her. A little of that transferred to me, but I know she'd rather I wait till she's out before entering the co-ed bathroom all the initiates share. There aren't even any sort of dividers between the showers and while I'd love to be in there right now with her, I have no doubt that she wants her privacy. That doesn't stop me from daydreaming images I'd never want her to know I had in my mind while I clean the floor. And hey, at least it keeps my mind off what I'm actually doing right now.

After returning the mop and then showering the blood off my bare chest, legs and feet and pulling on a clean pair of shorts, I'm startled to find Tris waiting right next to the door, her wet hair dangling over one shoulder in a braid. I take in the dark circles under her eyes, the slump of her shoulders as she leans against the wall. The stress of the whole situation is catching up to her. Hell, it's catching up to _me,_ and I wasn't the one who had to keep a guy with a knife in his eye calm.

Pulling her into my arms, I rest my chin on her head and silently hold her. "I don't think I'll be able to sleep," she mumbles into my chest. I wouldn't want to sleep in that room, either. Really, I don't want to be in it at all. That whole scene was… traumatic. And Peter's there snoring away in his bunk as if nothing happened. Does he have no conscience at all? Likely nothing will even happen to him since they aren't likely to find any proof that it was him. Hell, Eric probably is impressed with him for some sick reason. I won't even try to understand how that guy thinks.

Wordlessly, I pull away from Tris and take her hand. I walk back to my dormitory silently, gently pulling Tris behind me. When we reach my bed, I pull her to me again and whisper in her ear so we don't wake anyone. "Come cuddle up in my bed with me. We can both fit."

Once we're both in the bed, my girlfriend's head resting on my shoulder as her body presses up against me, one leg slightly overlapping mine and my arms wrapped around her back, I kiss her forehead.

"It was Peter," she says softly. "I'm sure of it."

I nod. "I caught Drew, but Peter got away. He was the only one not accounted for once I got to you, though, so it was obviously him. But there's no proof. They won't do anything about it."

"Why would they do that? Just because Edward was ranked above Peter?"

I have been thinking about that since I first saw Edward on the floor with the knife in his eye. How can someone be so desperate to be on top that they permanently disable someone to get them out of the way? Peter must be incredibly insecure. It's not like he was in any danger of being kicked out. I mean, I the higher he ranks, the better job he'll get, but seriously.

"Fear, Tris. Plain and simple. He's so unsure of his own ability, apparently, that he had to take out the competition. It's ironic that in his need to prove his bravery, he just proves his cowardice. He's weak, and he's a fucking pansycake."

Tris sighs. "I don't know how I'll go back to sleeping in there with him. I may not be ranked above him, but he already hates me, I guess just because of where I was raised."

"Then you can just sleep in here," I assure her. "We'll be safe together." My fingers gently trace patterns on her back and I feel her body relax a little more. "Sleep, Tris. I'll fight the nightmares if they come and get you."

Tris already sounds half asleep as she mumbles, "with what?"

"My bare hands. Did you forget that I'm the first ranked initiate? I can take 'em."

Tris chuckles slightly but I can tell she's drifting. "Good night, Tris," I whisper before I wrap my arms a little tighter around her, close my eyes, and finally drop off into sleep.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

"What the hell is the Stiff doing in here?"

Blinking, I let my eyes adjust to the light. I'm lying on the small cot in the dormitory with both arms wrapped around my girl. Her head rests on my shoulder, and one arm and one leg are lazily slung over me. She's still soundly sleeping. I did wake up once to her thrashing around and woke her from the nightmare, but otherwise we slept peacefully. Until now, obviously.

Yawning, I survey the room. Gabe is standing by my bed looking at us curiously. The other initiates are glancing at us, some with wide eyes, some with eyes narrowed and shaking their heads. Marlene is clearly making a point of not looking my way at all, and her head hangs a bit as she gets ready for her day. I'll need to talk to her soon. Today is probably not the day, though, unless Tris goes off with her transfer friends. After last night, I have no intention of leaving her at all today.

I put a finger to my lips to signal to Gabe that he should be quiet and not wake Tris before answering quietly. "Did you guys hear what happened in the transfer dormitory last night?" Gabe shakes his head, and Luke, Aiden and Lynn all make their way closer to hear me—I guess they're interested in hearing the gossip. "Someone stabbed their first ranked in the eye with a fucking butter knife. You know, that blond Erudite transfer, the big one, Edward?"

The initiates gathered near me whisper expletives and gasp in surprise. I continue. "I was having trouble sleeping, tossing and turning, and heard the screaming. I ran out into the hall and bumped right into one of the guys that attacked Edward. It was Drew, I took him down but the other one got away. I'm positive it was Peter. He was the only transfer who wasn't there or accounted for when I went in to help." I pause and glance down at my sleeping girlfriend. "Tris was the one who took charge. Kept him as calm as possible while waiting for the medics, cleaned up the mess, all of it. She was pretty amazing, honestly. Totally cool under pressure." I look at Lynn, she is the only one of these guys that has spent any time with Tris. "You should've seen her, Lynn."

Lynn nods, slightly smiling. "So is Edward going to be okay?"

I snort. "Doubt it. How okay would you be if someone stuck you with a damn butter knife? He'll lose the eye for sure, there was so much blood. I just hope that it didn't go deep enough to cause damage to anything worse."

"I don't want an asshole like that sticking around here," Luke spits. "What can we do? What was he ranked?"

"Second. He'll be hard to edge out of the rankings but if you have ideas, I'm all ears. He's targeted her from the start, and now we know how dangerous he is," I say, glancing down at Tris again as I speak.

"It won't get him out of Dauntless, but I have an idea," Lynn says as the corners of her mouth turn up into a wicked grin. "We invite all the transfers to a game of Truth or Dare and all target Peter."

I grin. "I like it. I bet he's never experienced the kinds of dares Dauntless-borns come up with before," I laugh for a second, but stop myself when Tris starts to stir a little and go back to whispering. "Okay, I'm going to stay here and let her sleep longer. But this afternoon I want to bring Tris with us to that little initiation ritual." Marlene huffs and stalks out of the dormitory. I ignore her and keep talking to Lynn and the guys. "Maybe we can do truth or dare tonight. I'll see if Zeke will let us use his place."

I can't find Marlene anywhere. I was hoping to talk to her while Tris is hanging out with Will; things have been so awkward and I miss my friend. Unfortunately, she seems to have disappeared into thin air.

"So you and your girl aren't attached at the hip after all?" I turn at my brother's voice.

"Shut up, man." I playfully punch Zeke in the shoulder. "Heading home? Can I chill for a bit?"

Zeke nods and we walk the rest of the way to his apartment in silence. Zeke bee-lines it to the kitchen and grabs a six pack of beer while I flop down onto the couch. "So, I heard that you saw the whole butter knife thing last night."

I shudder. "Yeah, man, that was awful. Tris was helping Edward, the rest of the transfers just stood and stared."

"Four said that the kid and his girlfriend both quit. The guy that you caught in the hall is going to be factionless too."

"Factionless for now. Dead, most likely, once Edward finds him."

An hour later we've finished the six-pack, I've beaten my big bro in a wrestling match and broken a lamp in the process, and briefly discussed the impending war. Zeke informed me of our plan to meet with the Priors in Abnegation tomorrow night.

"I just can't figure out how they intend to get Dauntless to be soldiers in their war?"

I shake my head. "I wish I knew. It would make it a lot easier to stop them if we understood what their plan was." I laugh. "Too bad we can't get Eric on our side, I'm sure he knows all the details."

"I think maybe we should bring Shauna in on this," Zeke suggests. "Maybe she knows something and doesn't know it. I mean, Four said he saw supply lists, and she works in the office where they do all the paperwork for receiving shipments and stuff. Maybe she can get more info for us."

I think about this for a while. Shauna is Zeke's girlfriend and they've been friends forever. In general she's trustworthy but somehow I feel uneasy. I'm not sure what it is.

"Has she ever said anything about the Erudite reports, or about divergents or anything?" I ask. "I mean, I know she's your girl and we've known her forever, but we can't be too careful. This is our lives on the line. Especially, Tris, Four and me."

I watch Zeke carefully. Sometimes body language tells you more than words. He's rubbing his chin, deep in thought, and his forehead is full of wrinkles and creases. "I don't know, man, we've never discussed divergents. Maybe I can find some way to bring it up and see how she reacts. Has Lynn ever said anything?"

I remember it coming up once. Like a year ago. I didn't know a damn thing about Divergents at the time so I honestly didn't have much clue what anyone was talking about and didn't offer an opinion. "I think it came up once, and she insisted they weren't real," I answer. "I'm pretty sure that's the only time I'd ever even heard of them. But I feel like she said something about her mom being paranoid about them. Maybe that's why I'm so nervous about Shauna." This conversation is just too serious. Zeke and I are never serious, I don't like it. "Better be able to keep your woman in line, bro," I tease.

Zeke laughs. "Like that's possible. You've met my stubborn as hell girl!"

Slightly buzzed, I again wander the halls of the Dauntless compound. It's noon—lunchtime, but Tris wasn't in the dining hall, and she isn't with Will any more. It's time to head out to the train and I still can't find her. Lynn and Marlene appear at my side.

"There you are! I've been looking for you, Mar."

Marlene grins flirtatiously. Ugh. "Oh, have you?" She bats her eyelashes. Damn it, she is just gonna keep making things awkward, isn't she?

"Yeah, but now we need to find Tris. I want her to come with us." Marlene scowls.

"Come on, Mar, Tris is cool," Lynn scolds.

Marlene just glares at her. "This is _supposed_ to be only for the Dauntless-borns," she whines.

"Yeah," Lynn says, "the Dauntless-borns with older siblings. You're an only child. You're getting a free pass to come along, too, so stop your complaining."

"She saw a guy stabbed in the damn eye last night, Mar," I scold. "Plus, she's my girlfriend, and I want her there." Marlene just glowers, but I'm not paying her any more attention because I spot Tris down an abandoned hallway. "I'll meet you guys up there at the train," I tell Lynn, since Marlene is busy pouting like a two year old, before jogging down the hallway, stopping in front of my beautiful girl.

Tris doesn't look up, but she knows I'm there. "My finger nails smell like blood," she nearly whispers. "I know they don't because I scrubbed them over and over but I swear I still smell it."

I offer her a hand and pull her up. Wrapping my arms around her, she rests her head on my chest and sighs. "You just need to get your mind off it," I tell her. "Want to get out of here?"

"What?" Tris asks, surprised. We aren't allowed to leave the compound without a member until we complete initiation, so getting out is rarely an option. "Where are you going?"

"To a little initiation ritual. Come on. We have to hurry." I don't wait for an answer, I just throw her over my shoulder and jog to the train, feeling Tris laugh against my back all the way there. Success! If she's laughing, I'm doing something right.

"The only initiates they usually let come are ones with older siblings in Dauntless," I tell her, "but they probably won't notice. Besides, the other Dauntless-borns and Zeke know you're coming and are fine with it. Just act like you belong."

"What exactly are we doing?" We've arrived at the train tracks and I tickle her slightly as I set her on her feet.

I can hardly contain my excitement. Risky fun like this is what makes Dauntless life the best! "Something dangerous," I answer her. Based on the look in Tris's eyes, my excitement and adrenaline junkie mania is contagious. I love this girl!

Wait, I mean, I like her. I like her a lot. That's what I meant.

As I hear the train horn, Dauntless around us begin to run. I grab my girlfriend's hand and join them, and in no time, we've both easily jumped aboard the train. Tris, this time, is as graceful as if she's been jumping trains her whole life, and it makes me smile with pride. We sit against one of the walls of the train car, with Zeke, Shauna, Lynn and Marlene.

Tris shouts to me over the wind, "Where are we going?"

Shauna—who is Zeke's girlfriend and Lynn's older sister—shouts, "You don't get to know. That ruins the surprise!"

Tris huffs a bit. "Where's Four?"

"He never comes to this," Shauna answers. "It's probably lost its appeal. Not much scares him, you know."

I snort—I somehow just can't hold it back. I mean, it's true, not much scares him, but Tris and I just happen to know exactly what does. I lean over to her and whisper-yell into her ear, "one clue—fear of heights. That's why Four isn't here."

Tris grins and nods in understanding.

Shauna gets up and moves to the open door of the train car to join some other members, and I pull Tris into my lap, burying my face in the crook of her neck, inhaling the almond scent of her shampoo. Marlene huffs out a sigh and follows Shauna to the door.

"Here we go!" I hear Shauna shout, and look up to see her jump out of the train. I hurry to stand up, pulling Tris with me, hurrying to the open door and joining the sea of Dauntless throwing themselves out onto the grass. I land on my feet and grab Tris's waist to steady her as she stumbles.

We jog as we catch up to the other members and initiates, following them around a corner onto Michigan Avenue, and the empty Hancock Building comes into view. Our group of Dauntless is spread out taking over the abandoned road, and I walk with my arm around Tris's shoulders. I squeeze her in reassurance, returning the grin she flashes at me when she looks up. I jerk my chin toward the building. "Glad I already know _you_ aren't afraid of heights, Trissy," I tease, poking her side to elicit a giggle.

"Do the elevators work?" Tris asks as we step through the empty hole that used to be a glass door, stepping on broken glass in the building's foyer.

"Sure they do," says Zeke with a roll of his eyes. "You think I'm stupid enough not to come here early and turn on the emergency generators?"

Zeke and stupid are two words that go hand in hand. "Yeah," I answer, "I kinda do."

I feign terror at the glare Zeke shoots me and am ripped away from Tris as he traps me in a headlock and rubs his knuckles into the top of my head. I'm taller than Zeke but he's just as strong as I am. He lets go when I smack him in the side. "Watch the hair, man!" I complain. "You're just jealous that I got all the good genes." Zeke snorts a laugh. Whatever, he knows it's true. Tris grins at me and I try to smooth out my hair as we climb into the open elevator.

"What floor?" Lynn asks.

"One hundred," Tris answers.

Marlene glares. "How would you know that?"

I inwardly groan. Mar's jealousy is really getting old. "Mar, come on. Be nice." She scoffs, crosses her arms, and looks away from me.

Tris can always hold her own though! I love that about her. "We're in a one-hundred-story abandoned building with some Dauntless. Why don't _you_ know that?"

Marlene just scowls as she punches the number 100 button as if she wants to push it right through the wall. I continue to fix my hair in the reflection of the elevator wall, satisfied about the time the elevator's display reads twenty, and wrap my arm around Tris's waist for the rest of the ride. The elevator moves fast and gives me that awesome feeling of my stomach being left behind. I love that feeling; it always leads to something daring and fun, just like it will today.

When the elevator doors open and we pile out, Zeke whistles a cheerful melody as he props a ladder from the floor to a hole in the ceiling, leading up to the Hancock building's roof. As we climb out onto the roof, I grin at Tris as she takes in the scene. A thick cable is attached to the building's tower, and a pile of black nylon slings sits near the edge. Zeke is hooking one up and members are beginning to form a line near where the cable disappears past the side of the building. I grin at Tris as Zeke begins to attach one of the slings to a pulley on the cable.

"We get to go zip lining!" I exclaim as I lead Tris to the line with my palm against the small of her back. We're the first initiates in the line, Tris in front of me, with about a half dozen members ahead of us.

Tris is wide-eyed, but her eyes shine with excitement. I'm definitely more afraid than she is, or maybe it's just that this is what fear does to her. It wakes her up, it makes her more alive. It's very cool to watch.

"How high up are we?" she asks.

"Over a thousand feet," Gabe answers from behind me. "Scared?" He's totally expecting her to chicken out. She'll prove him wrong.

"Nervous, but excited," she answers him before I pull her in for a short but passionate kiss.

We watch Shauna disappear over the edge of the roof and I hear Lynn gasp. We've never actually gotten to do this, and many of the initiates didn't actually know what we were doing today, I did though—I helped Zeke get the slings here when they did this last year. I've been waiting since then for my chance to go, though now it feels like there's a rock in my stomach. I mean… we're really, _really_ high up.

Before I know it, there's only one person ahead of Tris. She's bouncing on the balls of her feet in anticipation. I glance behind me and see Marlene, who is behind Gabe, looking at her smugly like she thinks Tris isn't Dauntless enough. Did she forget that Tris didn't even scream when she was first jumper?

Tris's first real show of fear comes when it's her turn to climb in. She's shaking and it makes it hard for her to climb in, so Zeke and I help her. "Don't worry," I barely hear Zeke say into her ear as he gets her positioned safely and buckles her in. "I gotta say, Stiff, I'm impressed you aren't screaming and crying right now," Zeke teases.

"I told you," I scold, "she's dauntless through and through. Now get on with it!"

"Careful, brother, or I might not tighten your straps enough, and then _splat!"_

"Yeah, yeah," I answer. "And then our mother would boil you alive."

"Only if she found out." Zeke tugs to check that the pulley holds and with a "Ready, set, go!" he releases Tris down the zip line before finishing the last word.

I watch Tris soundlessly speed away from us into the horizon for a minute before I begin to get into a sling myself. I look at Gabe and Marlene smugly and smirk at their shocked faces as I say, "guess you'd better stop calling her Stiff, huh?"

Mar rolls her eyes—that is really getting old—and Gabe laughs. "Now we get to see if you're as Dauntless as your girl," Gabe teases, playfully punching me in the shoulder as he hands me a flask. I take a long swig of the whiskey before I climb into the sling Zeke's been setting up for me, face first like Tris did.

"Holy fucking shit this is high up! Make damn sure that sling is tightened, Zeke." Maybe I'd better make Gabe check it.

Before I have a chance, Zeke pushes me off the ledge without warning. I scream at the top of my lungs as my stomach drops out from under me. The wind stings my eyes and makes tears collect in them as I soar over the city. This is fucking AMAZING. It's like I'm a bird! I can see the marsh extending all the way to the horizon in one direction. In another I swear I see all the way out to Amity, all the way past Amity. I almost think I can see something out there in the distance but it can't be. There's nothing out there, since the war, right? High in the sky what is that? Far in the distance? I guess it must be a bird but it looks weird.

I'm still screaming as the human net at the end of the line comes into focus. My smile is wide and my throat is getting sore as I try to find Tris, but she's tiny and surrounded by other Dauntless, so I don't see her. I pull the brake as I near the end and release the latch, laughing as I fall into the net created by hands gripping others' shoulders. As soon as I am on my feet I quickly find Tris, pick her up and spin her around.

"You sounded like a strangled cat," she laughs.

"A strangled cat? That's what you call my happy-excited-terrified scream, huh?"

"Yes, that's exactly what it sounds like." I laugh and shake my head. "So when can we do that again?!"

I laugh more. "We'll talk to Zekey-bear about it," I promise as we connect into a human net again to catch Gabe.

This is why I love Dauntless life, and I can't wait to share more of this with the amazing, brave girl beside me.


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

"Here are the rules, in case anyone has never played." I pull Tris a little closer with the arm I've wrapped around her waist before I continue. We and some other initiates are sitting in a circle on the floor in Zeke's living room. Me and Tris, Gabe, Luke, Marlene, Lynn, Christina, Will, Al, Molly and, of course, Peter. "It's your basic Truth or Dare—you pick which one, either do the dare or answer the question truthfully. If you refuse, you have to take off an article of clothing, and shoes and socks don't count. Everybody ready?" I specifically look at Peter and Molly, and see them nodding in acknowledgement. "I'll start since it's my party. Will, Truth or Dare?" Will looks slightly nervous then says, "Truth."

"PANSYCAKE!" I yell, and Tris covers her ears.

"What the hell, Uri? Did you forget my ear was 2 inches from your face?!"

"Sorry, babe—yes, I did forget." I pull her into my lap and kiss her cheek, grinning. "Okay so…. Will..." It's always so hard to think of good questions. I'm much better at coming up with dares. I end up going with the most generic one ever. "What sexy lady—or man, I suppose, not to rule anything out—do you like?"

"Whatever, man, I'm not into guys!" The tips of Will's ears turn red and he fingers the hem of his t-shirt, deciding whether to answer. Finally he lets go of his shirt and answers, looking intently at his shoes. "I like Christina." Christina grins widely, her brown cheeks darkening in a blush.

"Al," Will says, finally looking up. "Truth or dare?" Will's in on our plan, but we're trying to make things seem normal and all by waiting a few to start picking on Peter. I'm hoping we can successfully embarrass the hell out of the pansycake.

"Dare," Al mutters.

"Kiss your crush." Al gets up, crosses the room… _oh hell no._ He's leaning in to kiss my girl!

"She's taken, man," I growl. Al blushes bright red before kissing her cheek and scurrying back to his spot like a mouse. He may have at least fifty pounds on me, but clearly he doesn't want to mess with me. Good.

The game continues as I think of what dares to throw at Peter. I'm zoning out but snap to attention when I hear Lynn call on Peter. "Truth or dare?"

"Dare," Peter says smugly. I really hate that guy. I grin. Lynn is scary as hell and gives good dares. I can't wait to see what she comes up with!

Lynn taps one finger on her chin, pretending to think. "Go start a fight with either Four or Eric." Hell yeah! They will squash him like a bug!

Peter visibly pales, but he's too much of an arrogant ass to back down. He slowly gets up and I stand to follow him. "What are you doing, man?" Peter says with narrowed eyes as he trudges toward the door.

"Someone's gotta witness and make sure you do it. I'll be surprised if most of the room doesn't follow," I laugh. Not mentioning, of course, that if we don't easily come across Eric or Four in the Pit or something, I can likely find Four since I know where he lives, works, and all that.

Peter huffs as he opens the door. I think he actually thought he could somehow make us think he did the dare when he didn't? Ha, yeah right, like anyone would miss this! We approach the Pit and are lucky enough to come across Eric right away. I shove Peter's shoulder. "So there he is; walk up and punch him in the face."

Peter glares at me.

"Are ya chicken?" Luke taunts as Gabe starts making chicken noises. Peter continues to scowl as he slowly trudges toward Eric. Peter is all about _looking_ tough, even though we all know he's a coward. He's not going to publicly back down, which is what we were counting on.

Peter comes up behind our ruthless leader, taps him on the shoulder, and when he turns around… _POW!_ His fist flies into Eric's nose. Or at least, that's the intention, but Eric is a damn good fighter, and he's quick. He catches Peter's arm and twists it behind his back, and even from here I can hear a sickening 'pop'! Practically in the blink of an eye, Peter's on the ground, bloody and totally knocked out, while my friends snicker. Tris hides her face in my shoulder and when she pulls away from me I can see a battle between satisfaction and pity flash through her eyes.

Eric stalks over to us. "Get him to the infirmary, you little shits," he growls. Okay then. Luke and Gabe step forward and drag Peter off while the rest of us go back to Zeke's.

"Well," Lynn says with a laugh, "should we keep playing? Looks like Peter's done for tonight."

"Too bad, too," I smirk, "now I won't get to make him hang over the chasm."

"Just save it for the next time," Lynn says with a smirk, "unless he's too chickenshit to ever play with us again."

"Let's keep playing," Christina says. "Lynn, you choose someone again."

"Okay," Lynn says, scanning the room. "Uriah. You know the question."

I reply, "and you know my answer! Truth is for pansycakes. Dare me!"

She goes easy on me. "Get your tongue pierced."

I scoff. "You call that a dare, Lynn? You're going soft. I was thinking about doing that anyway."

Twenty minutes and one tongue piercing later, we're back in a circle at Zeke's place. I dare Tris to try peace serum, to which she takes off her sweater, and I'm not sure if I'm thankful or disappointed that she's got a tank top underneath—I'd love to see, but I don't want the rest of these perverts, especially Al, to see her in any less, so maybe I'll just have to make sure this party ends soon.

As people answer truths and do dares that I don't pay all that much attention to, I think more about the vial of peace serum I've had for several weeks waiting to use it for a dare. What if we could get like… peace serum bombs or something from Amity? Has something like that ever been tried to deal with a violent conflict? I wonder there's some sort of anti-serum we can use to protect ourselves from it and make everyone else act like silly banjo-strumming hippies? Cause, I mean, while peace serum would temporarily halt any sort of attack, if we were exposed too, we'd be totally useless at the same time the enemy was. Hmm… many things to remember to ask Four about later.

"…seven minutes in heaven with Uriah." What?! I was totally not listening, so I hope that was for Tris, but one look at the scowl on her face suggests that she was not the one receiving that Dare. I frantically glance around the room and… oh no. Marlene is grinning and making her way over here. _Crap crap crap what do I do?!_ It's not my dare so I can't just take off my shirt. Maybe I go with her and try to talk to her during those seven minutes?

I look at Tris for help, but she has never played a game like this before, and she won't even look at me. I have no idea what kind of fight it could cause if I go into a closet with Marlene. We've never had a fight yet, and I'm not anxious to find out how that would go down. As Marlene walks toward me I look back and forth between her and Tris, totally panicked. I'm sure I look absolutely nuts.

Marlene grabs my hand to pull me up, smiling flirtatiously. "Hold up, hold up," I finally blurt out. I pull my hand out of Marlene's and bend toward Tris, my face next to her ear. "I only want you, babe. Do you trust me?" She slowly nods. I'm still really nervous about this, but I let Marlene pull me into the coat closet. The door shuts and leaves us in total darkness. _It'll be okay, Tris trusts me._ Yeah, keep telling yourself that, Uriah.

"Mar, we need to—" her lips are already on mine, her arms are already holding me like a vice. I mumble trying to pull back as one of her hands moves to my hair. All I can think about is how Tris would react if that door opened right now. This feels entirely wrong. When Tris kisses me it's like my whole body tingles and heat starts in my chest and radiates to my fingers and toes; right now with Marlene attacking me with her lips, I don't feel like I'm melting like I do with Tris, I just want her off me. I wiggle my arms free and push Mar away, hard.

"Ow!"

"I was trying to say that we need to talk, Mar!" I whisper-shout. I hear her huff, then try to grab me again. " _No,_ Marlene. Look, I get that you like me. I noticed that. You're beautiful and funny and smart and brave—" she tries to attack me with her lips again, this time my neck, biting and sucking, and I push her away hard, again. "You need to stop, Mar."

"What's so great about her, huh? She looks like a 12 year old, she's a _stiff,_ and you _just_ met her!"

"No, I didn't," I retort. "I've sat by her in school for years, and I've been interested in her for a while. She's beautiful, brave, smart—it's not that one of you is _better_ than the other, I just don't feel that way for you. I'm sorry. I love you more like a sister, Mar. Not like that." I sigh. This is not going well at all. "I miss our friendship, can you please just—"

"You really don't feel anything when I do this?" And Marlene again grabs me, crashing her lips into mine. I push her back as quickly as her lips touch mine. Enough. This hurts—Marlene is my best friend and all I want is to keep things the same. To keep her as my friend, especially with an impending war, I need her on my side. But I know that even if Tris and I weren't together… Marlene feels more for me than I do for her and this would never have just worked itself out nicely. That much is clear.

So, as I push her away from me, hard, I slam the door open and storm out.

I look ahead of me at Tris. Her eyes look shocked and I realize I probably have lipstick on me, and messy hair. My fists clenched, I turn and glare at Marlene as she stands in the doorway of the closet, stunned. "You know I have a girlfriend, Marlene. I told you, I'm not interested. You're my best friend but you're sure not acting like it."

I cross the room, everyone staring with shocked expressions, and wrap my arms around Tris. "Party's over," I spit. "Everyone out. NOW."

As everyone files out, Marlene stands awkwardly in the middle of the room staring at me and Tris. I don't even look at her. "That includes you, Marlene."

As my best friend slowly walks to the door, feet dragging, tears in her eyes, and I don't miss the look of betrayal. As if I'm the one who did something wrong. I glare at her as she walks out of the apartment, the door slamming with a ring of finality.


	17. Chapter 17

_I haven't done a flashback before this, but I did today—the section that's in italics is a flashback. I think it's pretty obvious, but you know, just in case._

 **Chapter 17**

I sit with fourteen other initiates in a dim, damp hallway on a cold stone floor deep in the Dauntless compound, Tris pressed against my side and her head resting on my shoulder, Lynn sitting across from me. The first initiate, Rita, has already been called back. We started out as twenty initiates, now we are sixteen. Three transfers—Edward, Myra and Drew—and one Dauntless-born, James, were escorted from Dauntless and into their new factionless life yesterday afternoon. Al would have been cut if not for Drew and Peter's butter knife stunt, but thanks to them, he has another chance.

We were separated from the transfers in stage one, but now we're all being trained together.

I'd have expected it to make me less nervous, knowing what was coming in this stage, but it doesn't. Not at all. I've seen what these fears are like and I know it will be much worse when it's my own fears. I don't know what I'll see when I enter my simulation.

Peter sits on the other side of the hall a few yards down from me. I smirk at his bruises and the cast on his arm. Eric did some damage—he looks like shit.

"So," Lynn says, testing the rubber sole of her shoe against the stone floor, creating a squeaking noise. "Which one of you is ranked first, huh?"

Peter doesn't answer right away and doesn't have his usual confidence when he finally does. "Me."

"Bet I could take you," Lynn says casually. "I'm second, but I bet any of us could take you, transfer. We saw how easily Eric did last night." Her laugh comes out like a cackle. Now the smirk is impossible to wipe off my face.

"I wouldn't be so sure about that, if I were you." Peter's looking a little more confident now. He's a fool. Lynn fights dirty and I have no doubt she absolutely could take him. "Who's first?"

"Uriah," Lynn says. "And I am sure. You know how many years we've spent preparing for this?" The transfers look intimidated. I run my hand up and down Tris's arm as I continue to smirk at Peter. He shrinks away a bit. I've taken him before and I could do it again, and he damn well knows it, so he'd better leave my girl alone. Somehow I have a feeling that he's not that bright, though.

"So you're first," Molly says to me.

I shrug. "Yeah, and?"

"And you don't think it's a little unfair that you've spent your entire life getting ready for this, and we're expected to learn it all in a few weeks?"

"Not really," I answer, truthfully. "Stage one was about skill, sure, but no one can prepare for stage two." You know, no one except, apparently, for Tris and me, who will be aware and have some idea of what is coming. But I don't say that. We don't truly have an advantage, because the advantage we _do_ have could easily get us killed. "At least, so I'm told."

We spend twenty minutes in an awkward silence. Especially awkward, I think, for me, because Marlene won't look at me, and when she does, it's with a glare half the time, and this forlorn, sad, lovesick look the rest of the time. How did this get so messed up?!

Rita doesn't come out of the room with Four when the door opens again—either there's a back way out, or she's disappeared. I'm guessing it's the first option. "Marlene," Four calls. Thank. God. I couldn't handle hours more of those looks from her.

Last night after everyone left, I guess you could say that Tris and I had our first fight. I can't say I blame her for being angry with me. I told her to trust me, and I came out with a hickey, messed up hair, and lipstick all around my mouth. It really didn't look good. _I_ know I did nothing to encourage Marlene, but I know I can't expect Tris to be sure of that. Especially with how insecure I know she is, and with how long Mar and I have been friends.

...

 _As soon as the door shuts behind Marlene, Tris pushes me away and curls up on Zeke's couch, her knees pulled up to her chest, and sends a death glare my way. If looks could kill, I'd definitely be six feet under right now._

 _I don't move toward her; we've never had a fight, and I don't know what will help, and what will just make things worse._

" _Tris," I plead. I just don't know what to say to her. Well, there are all kinds of things running through my head, about how I knew Mar liked me and I am not interested and I tried the whole time to push her away. About how I just wanted to try to talk things through with her so that we could stay friends. But I'm speechless, because I'm afraid anything I say is just going to come out wrong and dig me a deeper hole._

" _You asked me to trust you," Tris whispers. "Then you come out of that_ closet _covered in lipstick and—and—is that a hickey?!"_

 _I try to look at my collarbone and neck but I can't bend that way. "Probably," I admit. I slowly approach her and sit Indian style on the couch a few feet away from her. Her forehead drops to rest on her knees. The only sound is the rhythmic tick of the clock on the wall, counting out the seconds that we sit here, tense, saying nothing to one another. She's so close but I feel like she is miles away._

" _Tris," I plead again. "I didn't—I don't… look, I don't like Marlene that way. You even heard me say that, right? You saw me kick her out. You were there when I threw that closet door open and yelled at her." Tris turns her head so that her cheek now rests on her kneecaps, eyes finally studying my face as I talk. I sigh. "I knew Marlene liked me, and I should have told you. I'm sorry for not talking to you about it. I just didn't know how. I thought that I could talk it through with Marlene, make it clear that I wasn't interested, and things could go back to normal."_

 _She continues to watch me. This is torture. I have no clue what she is thinking right now. All I know is that if she thinks I want Marlene, she's wrong. I only want Tris._

" _Tris, I went in there just wanting to talk to Marlene and clear the air. It's been driving me mad how she keeps glaring at you and being rude to you. She's been my best friend forever. Like ten years now. It hurts me to lose that, but she's clearly not going to let it go, and I don't feel that way about her. I love her, but like a sister. I don't feel for her what I feel for you, Tris."_

 _Tris studies me a bit longer, and I take a chance and move closer to her. I take one of her hands in mine and rub my thumb back and forth on the back of her hand. "Tris," I close my eyes. "Say something, please."_

 _I hold my breath waiting for her reaction. Finally I feel her lean against me. "I'm sorry, Uriah," she whispers. "I should have trusted you. I said I trusted you, but I didn't act like it. Everything you're saying matches what happened when you came back out here. It's just… she's so pretty, and I'm not. And she knows you so well, and there's so much history. And when you came out looking like you and she just made out… it hurt. I don't see how I can compare to her."_

 _When will this girl ever understand how beautiful and smart and amazing she is? "I don't want anyone else, Tris. I've told you that. I wish you saw yourself how I do. Do you know what I see?"_

 _Tris shakes her head and her voice comes out barely a whisper. "What?"_

" _Your eyes are an amazing grey-blue, like storm clouds. When you're happy, they turn more blue, like the sky on a cloudless day. They're so big I could get lost in them, and in fact, I do, often." She laughs a little. "Your lips are such a perfect pink and so soft. And I love the way your body fits against mine when I hold you. It's like puzzle pieces."_

 _I pull her into my lap and wrap my arms around her. "Last night when you were helping Edward, I was totally in awe of you. You stayed so calm, you kept_ him _calm during probably the worst moment of his life. I know you must have been afraid, but while everyone else froze because they were scared, your eyes got brighter and more focused, you did exactly what needed to be done, you didn't hesitate. It's like fear wakes you up, brings out something amazing. It's mesmerizing to watch."_

 _Now her eyes are glued to mine as I think of what else makes her amazing. "You're selfless. I know you don't think you were good enough, selfless enough, for Abnegation, but Tris, I've never seen anyone as selfless as you. When Al was going to get knives thrown at him, you stepped up, stood up against the faction's biggest bully, and took his place. When we were in Four's fear landscape, you jumped right in front of him and took the brunt of that belt so he wouldn't have to. And Tris, you're smart. You're so deadly smart. Like climbing the Ferris wheel during capture the flag—that was genius."_

 _I lean in and press a tender kiss against her lips. We lean our foreheads together and both leave our eyes closed. "There's no one else I'd rather be with, Tris. You're extraordinary. And I hope you'll forgive me for what happened tonight."_

 _Her hand touches my cheek and I lean into her touch. I open my eyes to see her staring right into them. "I forgive you, Uriah. There's no one else I'd rather be with, either."_

 _..._

Hours drag by, as every fifteen to thirty minutes another initiate is called in, and slowly the crowd of initiates lining the walls dwindles. Finally, the third to the last initiate, Luke, is called back and it's down to me and Tris. Somehow I'm guessing Four did that on purpose. Tris has fallen asleep on my shoulder, but either she or I will be next, so I shake her shoulder a bit and press a kiss to her forehead to wake her.

"Hmmm?" she murmurs sleepily.

"It's almost our turn, babe."

Tris sighs. "Are you nervous? I'm scared. I don't know what I'll see in there. Or whether I'll be able to… do it right."

I glace up at the ceiling a few yards away; I can tell there's a camera hidden there. We need to be careful what we say here. "We'll be fine, Babe."

More time passes sitting in silence and Four finally calls me back, leaving Tris alone in the hallway.

The simulation room has a chair like a dentist's chair, just like the aptitude test room. There isn't much else that's similar here, though—the walls are dingy and gray, the floor is dirty. I sit down in the chair and wait while Four stands at a counter across the room fiddling with syringes and serums.

He approaches me with a syringe and sits in a chair in front of a computer screen. "You have a general idea of how this works, Uriah, so I'm going to skip a lot of the explanation," he says, sounding bored, but I can see the nervousness in the creases of his forehead and the pinched look to his mouth. "I'll inject you with this serum, which will induce a hallucination that represents one of your fears, and you have to face it or calm down to come out of the sim." He doesn't hesitate before sticking the needle into my neck and pressing the plunger. "The simulation will begin in one minute. I'll be able to see the images with these electrodes attached to me, but you won't have any wires on you, the serum has transmitters that will send the data to the computer." Four attaches the electrodes to his own head, then looks at me. "Be brave," he says as I slip into darkness.

* * *

I am sitting on a dirt floor. It's like a room, probably five yards wide and shaped like a circle. All the walls are dirt, and a few places I can see tree roots sticking out. I look up; the blue sky is above me, but the walls are about five times as tall as I am, and there are no doors. I'm trapped here.

Then I hear something. _Ssssss._ My heart begins to pound as my eyes dart around the deep pit with no escape. Then, I see the hole in the wall, and the snake slithering out of it. I back up quickly, soon crashing into the wall behind me. As the snake slithers out of the hole, another follows it, then another. How did I get here? Who put me here? I was with the other initiates, then I saw Four… oh. _This isn't real._ I could create a ladder, like Four created a door in the first fear he took us into, or I could just go pet the snakes because I know they are not real… but either option would probably give away my divergence.

I creep to my right as the snake comes closer, but now there are six of them with more coming. _What would a Dauntless do?_ This is so much harder when it's your own fear. My heart is pounding, my breath is coming in short bursts, and sweat is beading on my forehead. More and more snakes come out of the hole, one after another.

I rip off my shirt and run to the hole, kicking snakes out of my way as I do. As soon as the next one is out I shove my shirt into the hole; now no more snakes can make it through there.

That, of course, doesn't change the fact that there are now nine snakes in this pit with me and I have no escape. Before I can dodge the three snakes converging on me, one lashes out and bites me. I scream in pain and terror. _It's just a simulation. It isn't real._ My right foot finds the snakes back and I stand on it hard. Another snake hisses then sinks its teeth into me and I hiss in pain as I stomp on the first one's head. There, one dead, eight to go.

I continue to catch and kill the snakes, but more and more of them bite me and the venom slowly turns my veins to lead. It's getting harder to stay upright, harder to keep my eyes open, as the venom courses through my body. Finally I am to the last snake. I crush its head with my foot and close my eyes.

When I open them, I'm in the simulation room again, breathing fast, clammy with sweat dripping down my forehead, with Four staring at me with a hint of a smile.

"You did well, Uriah," he says.

"I did?"

"Very. And you got through in six minutes. That's twice as fast as any of the others." Hmm. It felt more like an hour. "Are you okay?"

I close my eyes and keep panting. "Yeah, just give me a minute." Four nods. I breathe through my nose with my eyes closed as the terror coursing through my veins begins to fade away. "You can go out the back door there," Four says, pointing.

I nod, and silently get up and leave the room. As I'm stepping out into the hallway, Four's voice stops me. "Don't forget. Tonight." I just nod. He means the meeting with the Priors.

* * *

It feels like I've barely sat down in the hallway outside the back door to the fear simulation room when I hear it open. I'm about ten yards away, and I see Four and Tris come through together. He appears to be dragging Tris by her arm. They don't see me, and turn away from me walking down the hall. I follow at the same pace.

Abruptly, Tris pushes Four away. "Why did you do that to me? What was the point of that, huh? That was torture!"

"Did you think overcoming cowardice would be easy?" Four replies emotionlessly.

"Cowardice is how you decide to be in real life, and in real life, I am not getting pecked to death by crows, Four!" Covering her face with her hands she begins to sob. When she speaks again, she sounds the weakest I ever heard her. "I want to go home."

I feel for her, but she doesn't have the option to go home. There is no reversing your choice. She's here or she's factionless, living in the slums, not fitting in anywhere. We've always been taught that factionlessness is a fate worse than death.

"You know why you have to do this, Tris." He's leaning in too close. "Learning how to think in the midst of fear is a lesson that everyone needs to learn. That's what we're trying to teach you. You'll either do it or you can get the hell out of here, because we won't want you."

"I'm _trying._ But I'm failing."

Failing? I swear I wasn't waiting out there for her more than like five minutes! I've caught up to them now, so I wrap my arms around her both to comfort her and to remind Four to back off. Four's eyes flick to me for only a moment. "You got this, Uriah?" he asks. I nod. "She was only in for three minutes. You're not a failure, Tris."

" _Three minutes?!"_ I exclaim, louder than I meant to. "Tris, Four said I was twice as fast as the next fastest and I was in twice as long as you."

Tris finally looks up at me, stunned. "Really?" I nod. Then I lean in and whisper, so the cameras for sure won't pick up, "and remember, we get to go see your parents tonight. So you can at least go home for a little while." She looks up at me with a smile that doesn't reach her eyes before leaning her head against my chest. Four is disappearing down the hallway. I pull away and place a hand on her shoulder. "Come on, babe. Let's go eat some cake! Cake is the answer to ninety-nine percent of life's problems." She giggles, flashing me her gorgeous smile—one that her eyes are participating in this time—and we walk toward the dining hall hand in hand.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18**

After I've stuffed three slices of delicious Dauntless chocolate cake—and a hamburger and some fries—into me, and Tris has done the same, though much smaller portions and only one slice of cake, we head back to the dorm.

I intertwine my fingers with hers as we walk. "So, being pecked to death by crows, huh? Sounds unpleasant."

Tris glances at me nervously. "Yeah, it really was. I could have sworn I was in there for at least half an hour. Eventually I just gave in and let them eat me alive. It was horrible." She shudders. "I don't want to do that again." Tris leans into me and I let go of her hand and wrap my arm around her. "What was yours?"

"Snakes," I answer simply. She nods. "I was in this deep pit with no way out, and there was a hole where I guess the snakes had a nest or something. More and more kept coming out and slithering toward me. Finally I thought to stuff the hole with my shirt so they wouldn't keep coming, and then I stomped on their heads to kill them."

"Smart," Tris says with a hint of a smile.

"Yeah, I couldn't do it without them biting me, though. The venom had about killed me by the time I got out of the sim." Tris and I both shudder. "I really don't want to go back and do that again tomorrow, either."

We continue silently the rest of the way back to the dormitory. I'd planned on leading her over to the room I stay in, but walking past the transfer dormitory's door, we notice a crowd gathered and go in to check it out. Peter is reading something aloud, holding a piece of paper in both hands. A nervous heaviness settles in my stomach, because if Peter's behind whatever's happening, it's probably Tris that he's after.

" _The mass exodus of the children of Abnegation leaders cannot be ignored or attributed to coincidence. The recent transfer of Beatrice and Caleb Prior, the children of Andrew Prior, calls into question the soundness of Abnegation's values and teachings."_

Christina shoots us a worried look. Tris stands as still as a statue as I study her face. I haven't ever seen this expression on her face before, and I can't quite read it.

Peter continues, _"Why else would the children of such an important man decide that the lifestyle he has set out for them is not an admirable one? Molly Atwood, a fellow Dauntless transfer, suggests a disturbed and abusive upbringing might be to blame. 'I heard her talking in her sleep once,' Molly says. 'She was telling her father to stop doing something. I don't know what it was, but it gave her nightmares.'"_

Molly smiles, showcasing her crooked teeth, which Tris is probably thinking about knocking right out of her ugly face.

"What?" Tris rasps in a scratchy, tight voice. She clears her throat. _"What?!"_

Peter looks up and stops reading. A few transfers turn around, pity on their faces. Molly and Peter, the only two remaining transfers that are not friends of Tris, smirk, and Peter's smile widens as he turns to face her.

"Give me that," Tris says, reaching for the paper.

"But I'm not done reading," Peter replies joyfully. He scans the paper to find the place where he left off. _"However, perhaps the answer lies not in a morally bereft man, but in the corrupted ideals of an entire faction."_ My feet carry me toward Peter, acting independent of any sort of conscious command from my brain. _"Perhaps the answer is that we have entrusted our city to a group of—"_

Tris has begun to storm toward him, but I've already grabbed the paper out of his hands and begun to rip it to pieces. Tris stomps on Peter's foot and he grits his teeth as I continue turning the paper into confetti, and then she lunges toward Molly. Before she can make contact, Will is pulling her away. I'd have just let her attack, she can take Molly, she's done it before.

"That's my _father_!" Tris screams. "My father, you coward!" Will is dragging her across the dormitory into the hallway. I throw out the handful of tiny paper scraps before making my way to them and hugging her, rubbing small circles on her back. It's not calming her down as fast as I'd hoped, and she's now focused on Will. "What? Did you think I couldn't defend myself against that piece of Candor trash?"

"We all know you can, Babe," I assure her.

"I just figured I'd stop you from starting a brawl in the dormitory. Calm down," Will says.

Tris cackles. "Calm down? Calm _down_? That's my _family_ they're talking about, that's my _faction_!"

"No, it's not," Will reminds her. "It's your old faction, and there's nothing you can do about what they say, so you might as well just ignore it."

"Tris," I say firmly, holding her chin and turning her head to face me. I lower my voice and bend down a bit so she can hear me. "This is just like the knife throwing. You need to act like you're Dauntless and nothing else. That's not your faction any more. Dauntless is your faction and your family."

Tris sighs as she rests her forehead against my chest. "Will," she says, more patiently now, "your dumb ex-faction isn't just throwing around insults. They're calling for an overthrow of our entire government."

I pull her tighter. "Tris, stop," I whisper harshly. "There are cameras here." She straightens.

Will laughs. "They're arrogant and dull, and that's why I left them, but they aren't revolutionaries. They just want more say, that's all. They want to be heard."

This conversation has _got_ to stop. Now. We aren't safe talking about this here. The last thing we need is for our corrupt leaders to realize we're aware that a war is brewing, and we certainly don't need them to be certain that we'd be on the 'wrong' side of it. "Enough, both of you." I lower my voice, hopefully quiet enough not to be picked up by the camera I know is about three yards away. "We need to talk about some things here, but this is not the time or place. It isn't safe here."

I stomp away, glancing behind me after a moment to be sure they are following me.

* * *

I knock at Zeke's door, fishing the spare key he gave me out of my pocket when there's no answer. I motion them to follow me in, shutting the door and turning the lock once they enter, still glaring at each other. I rub my face with my hands in frustration before moving into the kitchen. "Anyone else want a beer?" Pretty much grabbing a beer the moment I walk into Zeke's apartment has become habit by now. Will calls out that he'd like one, and I grab some orange juice and vodka, making a weak screwdriver for Tris, before returning.

"Here you go, Babe," I say as I hand her the cocktail. "It's called a screwdriver," I warn her, "it's got vodka in it. But I made it weak for you." She nods and takes the glass, wincing slightly as she takes her first sip, but taking another right afterward anyway.

Will opens his beer and sits down on the couch, arms crossed. I sit at the other end and Tris curls into me, pulling her feet up under her. She sighs.

"Will," I start, "explain to us please what _you_ think is going on with Erudite and these articles." Four and I had talked about bringing Will in on the whole war thing, but I'm thinking I'd better hear his thoughts one more time before I risk it.

Will sighs. "Obviously if I was all that loyal to Erudite, I'd have stayed there," he says, rolling his eyes. Not necessarily, but he may very well see it that way. "There are a lot of people in Erudite who don't like Abnegation having total control of the government. They want to have a real say, not just the right to speak to the council and ultimately likely be ignored." He takes another sip of his beer. "Furthermore, I don't believe it's logical to assume that just because the people of Abnegation _claim_ to be selfless and morally upstanding citizens, that it's always true. They choose the councilmen based on peers' opinion of their character and leadership skills, but none of us _really_ knows what the others are like behind closed doors."

I nod. Everything he's said so far make sense to me, and our experience in Four's fear landscape proved Will's thought process to be correct when it comes to the most powerful man in our government, Marcus Eaton. "Tris," I say, nudging her. "What do you think about what Will just said." Maybe I really do have an aptitude for Amity. Maybe I should have gone there and become a mediator.

Tris scowls for a moment before finally looking at Will. "I can see your perspective, I guess," she says, "and you're right that just because someone _says_ they value selflessness, and they _appear_ to be a morally strong person, that is not necessarily true. But I don't think a whole overthrow of the government is necessary to fix it." Also true. Tension is beginning to melt away, I think they will end up on the same page here.

"I don't think anyone is suggesting overthrowing the government," Will says carefully.

Little does he know. "What if they were?" I ask. "What would you think about that? What if they were about to start a war?"

Will scoffs. "Erudite aren't revolutionaries or soldiers. They don't know how to fight. How could they start a war?"

"Hypothetically," I say patiently.

Will may not be an Erudite at heart, but he was raised there, and he has the mannerisms of one. I've said it before—transfers never fully leave behind their old factions. When an Erudite thinks, it's like you can see all the gears turning. " _If_ they were to somehow find a way to actually _fight_ a war, against Abnegation, no, I wouldn't agree with that. Abnegation wouldn't even fight back. And they're not all corrupt, I suspect that hardly any of them are. It's clear that the article Peter was just reading was complete lies, and a lot of the others probably are, too."

I look to Tris. "Satisfied?" She pauses before nodding. "Do you trust him?" Another pause, another nod.

"Okay," I say, taking a deep breath to gather my thoughts and my nerve.

Will is smart enough to know something is really up. He looks at us nervously. "What… what's going on, guys?"

"I'll fill you in on the basics," I tell him, "but I'd like you to come with us to a meeting tonight. You may be able to help."

* * *

I try to be quiet as I move through the dark streets of Abnegation. Quiet is not something I'm used to being, but I suppose it's good to practice it sometimes. Every house is dark; it's nearly midnight. It appears that no one in this entire faction is awake, which is a relief, because our small crowd of five Dauntless would look pretty suspicious to anyone who happened to be watching.

"Lead the way, Tris," I say softly. She grabs my hand and pulls me along with her as she expertly hops over the cracks and holes in the sidewalks and streets, weaving her way to her parents' home. I really don't know how even she can tell which one it is—every single house in this entire faction looks literally exactly like all the others.

We walk up to the only house with a hint of light coming through its blinds and Tris knocks, then enters without waiting for an answer, motioning us to follow. We've entered into a simple living room, with a fireplace, gray couch, and two beat up, overstuffed gray chairs. A basket of yarn with a knitting work-in-progress sits by the fireplace. The walls are gray, the place is simple and tidy, without any decorations. Once we are all inside, she locks the door and follows us to meet her parents in the kitchen, which is just as gray and simple as the living room was.

I've met Mrs. Prior—or Natalie, as she insisted I call her—twice before, but I've never met Mr. Prior. Zeke has met neither, and Will has only met Natalie at visiting day, as far as I know. Four has surely met them both when he lived here, but I doubt either of them recognize him.

Tris begins the introductions. "Well, Mom has met some of you, but this is my dad, Andrew Prior, and my mom, Natalie." They nod their heads at us. "Mom, Dad, this is Four—" she points to each person as she says their names "—and he is my initiation instructor. Then this is Will, he's a transfer like me; Zeke is Four's best friend and Uriah's brother; and this is my boyfriend, Uriah."

Mr. Prior eyes me warily, but I pretend not to notice as I smile and reach out my hand. "Nice to meet you, Mr. Prior," I say warmly.

"You all can call us Natalie and Andrew," Natalie interrupts the potential interrogation that Andrew was probably about to start in on. Tris has slipped away to a closet and returns with a few folding chairs; I help her place them around the table and everyone takes a seat. I think better of putting my arm around Tris and hold her hand instead.

Natalie starts the meeting off. "So, I take it everyone here is aware that Erudite is planning a war, and that they will be using Dauntless to fight it, correct?" We all nod.

"I work in the control room," Four begins, "so I have access to computers and security footage whenever I am alone enough for others not to notice what I'm doing. I'm also good with computers. I installed a mirroring program on Eric's computer—and almost got caught, by the way—and through that, I've been able to locate some files that give us some information."

"What sort of information have you come across?" Will asks.

"Maps of Abnegation; supply lists showing enough weaponry, ammunition, etc. to arm the entire faction. And some simulation serum, cases and cases of it. I haven't figured out how that fits in, yet."

"We also don't know when this will happen, or how they plan to make us fight, which makes it pretty hard to make a plan to stop them," Tris interjects.

"What about you, big brother?" I raise my eyebrows at Zeke. "Have you been able to find anything else since Four told you about all this? With initiation and all you're working a lot more than he is."

Andrew is sitting forward with his elbows on the table, looking very focused as he takes in everything we're saying so far. But I notice the puzzled look on Tris's face and follow her gaze to Natalie, who is wringing her hands, staring off into space, and I try to read her expression. Her forehead is wrinkled and her eyebrows furrowed, her mouth in a straight line. But her eyes look wide and contemplative. I'd think she was just worried and anxious about the potential war, but if that was all it was, I don't think Tris would be looking at her like that.

"I've managed to find the same files that Four did, but I think Eric is probably just good at hiding things," Zeke answers. "Do we have any connections in Erudite? Anyone who might be close enough to Jeanine Matthews to have some more insight?"

I look at my brother blankly. "How are you sounding like, almost, intelligent, Zeke? It's like I don't even know you." He smacks me upside the head.

"Well," Andrew says, ignoring Zeke and me, "our son Caleb is in Erudite, but he's just an initiate. I'd think he'd be trustworthy, but I doubt he would have enough information to be worth taking any sort of risk."

Will clears his throat. "I was born Erudite," he offers. "My sister is still there, and she does work somewhat closely with Jeanine."

Tris scoffs. "Yeah, your sister. The one who accused my mother of hoarding goods at Visiting Day?" Will sighs.

"We will keep that in mind, Will, and consider our options if we find anything specific we need help with there." Will nods, his face relaxing. I'm not sure I trust his sister either, but Will would know better than I would, right?

"How are you all ranked in initiation?" Natalie suddenly asks. I suppose she wants to know whether the people on our side have any worthwhile skill to speak of once the shit hits the fan.

Four speaks up. "They don't know their overall ranks, since we haven't shown them the rankings that combine the Dauntless-born and transfers, but as the transfers' instructor I know them. We just did our first day of stage two today. At the end of stage one, Uriah was in first place, Will was in fifth, and Tris in ninth. However, Tris's fighting improved tremendously over the course of stage one, and she's got good aim with knives and guns."

"She's also incredible under pressure," I offer. "She could very well be our best asset when this all goes down." Four and Will nod in agreement and Tris's cheeks turn a deep shade of pink. I kiss her on the cheek. "It's true, Babe." Andrew glares.

"I take it no one here in Abnegation will be able to fight with any skill," Zeke observes.

Tris and I look at one another, then at Natalie. "Mom?" Tris says. "Uriah and I were wondering, after Visiting Day… you might know how to fight and stuff, right? We wondered if maybe… maybe you used to be Dauntless."

Four, Zeke and Will all look at her in surprise, and Natalie just smiles slightly. "I was." She pauses and looks lovingly at Andrew. "Andrew and I fell in love before our choosing ceremony. He was Erudite, and I was Dauntless. We transferred here together."

I can't help but grin, because it reminds me of me and Tris, a little. I mean, we hadn't exactly fallen in love, but I did kind of talk her into transferring where I was because I liked her for so long. That, and the fact that she's a natural.

Tris, though, looks absolutely stunned. "Dad… you… you were… Erudite?!" she stutters. "But you hate Erudite!"

"Yes," is all Andrew says. I guess he isn't going to elaborate. Okay then.

"I need to know," Natalie says, "which of you all are divergent."

Will's eyes go wide and he glances around the room fearfully. "You think someone here might be divergent?!"

"I'm hoping more than the two I know of," Natalie says matter-of-factly.

"I am," Four says. "And of course, Tris and Uriah." Will gapes. Zeke shakes his head, and so does Will.

"Well," Natalie says, taking a deep breath. "I have learned some new information this week, and it's going to be a lot to take in. First I'll tell you what I know about the war, and then I will tell you _how_ I know it."

Andrew rubs thumb back and forth across the back of Natalie's hand as she continues. "Erudite wants to take over the government. In order to do so, they are going to use Dauntless to attack Abnegation with orders to kill. Not just councilmen, though they are the primary target, of course, but everyone. Even children." Four closes his eyes. Tris gasps. Zeke runs his hands over his face and Will just gapes. They are going to expect us to come in here and kill _children?_

I say my next thought out loud. "How the hell do they expect to get us to go around killing innocent children?! I mean, I don't even know how they expect to pull off going after the council, but kids?!"

Natalie sighs. "I don't yet know when, and I don't know all the details about the serum, but my source tells me that they will somehow use a simulation serum to make the Dauntless act as soldiers for their cause. From what I understand, the serum will not work on Divergents. You'll be aware, just as you are in your fear simulations."

We sit in stunned silence. Finally Tris asks, "Who is your source?"

Natalie looks at her silently for a long moment, like she doesn't know how to say what she needs to say next.

Natalie reaches out across the table. One of her hands grabs hold of mine, and the other Zeke's. What on earth could she be about to say?! My heart pounds in my chest and Zeke and I exchange a nervous, confused glance.

"My source is Nick Pedrad. Zeke, Uriah… your father is alive."


	19. Chapter 19

_I hope everyone had a safe and happy New Years! I've been trying to update more frequently, and I would have, but I needed to think about where exactly this story is going so I don't write myself into a corner. Now that I've finally worked through some of that, I have an update for you! Let me know what you think!_

 _Oh! Also… I was wondering if you'd like a parallel story from Tris's POV? I don't want to bother writing it if no one will read it, but if you're interested, tell me!_

 **Chapter 19**

 _Natalie reaches out across the table. One of her hands grabs hold of mine, and the other Zeke's. What on earth could she be about to say?! My heart pounds in my chest and Zeke and I exchange a nervous, confused glance._

" _My source is Nick Pedrad. Zeke, Uriah… your father is alive."_

I can't hear anything but the roar of my blood pulsing through my veins. My eyes can't seem to focus on anything in front of me. My mind seems to be incapable of forming a coherent thought.

Time has no meaning and I have no concept of how long I sit there before I finally register Tris's hands cradling my face. Her eyes are much grayer than usual as they come into focus, my eyes peering directly into hers. I see tears pooled in them. The creases between her eyebrows are more pronounced than I've ever seen them and her lips are pressed together in a straight line. Slowly the pounding of my own pulse fades and I begin to hear my friends' tense voices.

I look around and see that Zeke and Four aren't in their seats anymore. In fact, I don't see them anywhere as my eyes dart around the room.

Tris's arms wrap around me, her chin resting on my shoulder, her mouth nearly touching my ear. "Uriah? Are you okay?" I shake my head, no. Is she serious? _Am I okay?!_ I just found out that my father, who has supposedly been dead for twelve years, is actually alive. Of course I'm not okay!

I close my eyes. "Where's Zeke?" My voice comes out tight and panicked.

Tris stands up, taking my hand, and leads me away from the table full of people. Up the stairs, into a plain gray bedroom, and I follow her out the window onto the fire escape. We climb, finally ending up on the roof, and there I finally see Zeke and Four. Tris glances around uncertainly. "I'll just… go continue the meeting so I can fill you all in later, I guess…"

I want to tell her to stay, that I need her here. But I seem to have lost the ability to speak, so a moment later Tris is gone, and I stand on the roof staring at my brother and Four with my face and mind blank.

"Uriah, come sit down," Four commands after several minutes of silence.

"Twelve years," Zeke whispers. "Twelve years, he's been gone and he's been alive this whole time? Why did he leave us? Why did he let us think he was dead? Does Mom know?" Four and I don't have answers for him; I'm wondering the same thing.

I just shake my head.

"I know how you feel," Four finally says, and I snort.

"How could you _possibly_ know how we feel, Four?!" I yell, standing up, making him jump slightly. Zeke even looks startled. I trudge over to the side of the roof and sit on the ledge, my feet dangling off the side in the cool night air.

Four and Zeke appear on either side of me. Four sighs. "You know that my mom died when I was nine, right?" he begins. We nod. "Well, a few months after I came to Dauntless, a cryptic note appeared on my table while I was out. The way it was written, it had to be someone who knew me well, and I thought maybe it was my dad but I went anyway."

He glances at Zeke, who probably needs more explanation than I do. "My father is Marcus Eaton, and the Erudite reports about his mistreatment of his only son are entirely true."

Zeke's eyes widen before he starts in on a series of exclamations. I patiently wait for him to calm down, and Zeke's eyes narrow when he notices. "Why don't you look surprised, Uriah?"

"I already knew," I answer. "I've been in his fear landscape. To practice for fear sims."

Zeke frowns. "You trusted him and not me, Four? I'm your best friend!"

"Look," I interrupt, "can you guys talk about that later? This is too much for one night. Let's get back to your story, Four."

Zeke reluctantly nods and Four takes a deep breath and lets it out, then continues. "Well, I went to the place the note said at the time it said and it turned out… it was my mother. Turns out, she never died. She left Abnegation and has been living factionless for the last nine years." Okay, maybe he _does_ have some idea of how we feel.

"She left me alone with that monster," Four whispers.

We sit in silence. I mean, what is there to say? What can you say about parents who abandon you, leaving you to think they're dead for years and years?

I turn when I hear footsteps climbing the stairs and see Tris's blond head come into view. Zeke scoots over for her to sit next to me on the ledge.

"I can't imagine what a crazy night this is already for you guys," Tris starts, "but we need to finish up our meeting and get back to Dauntless." She leans into me, resting her lips on my cheek. I don't know how I'm going to be anything but useless for the rest of tonight, but I guess I'll just go sit through it and they can just tell me what they need me to do. My mind is spinning and I feel separate from my body. Dazed, I follow the others back into the house.

* * *

Another day, another simulation.

I didn't sleep last night. It was nearly four in the morning when Tris and I climbed into my bed. She drifted off quickly, but I lay awake trying to make sense of the news that my dad is alive.

I had barely registered anything that was said for the rest of the meeting. I caught bits and pieces of the explanation about my father's disappearance. Everyone but Andrew was shocked to learn that many of the divergent that have been lost to untimely 'accidents' over the years have actually been relocated, for their safety, with the help of none other than Tris's mother, Natalie Prior.

Even hearing this, in my muddled thoughts I couldn't make the connection until it was spelled out for me. My father, Nick Pedrad, was—is—divergent. I guess I should have wondered about that as soon as I found out I was—that either my mother or father probably was, too. But I never thought about it. The same 'special talent' I'm trying desperately to hide was passed down to me by my father, and it is the reason I have grown up without him since before I was even old enough to begin school.

The rest of the meeting, I caught snippets of—Four giving Natalie two handguns; something about a file on a flash drive, which was entrusted to Four; I vaguely registered a discussion about bringing Shauna into the loop and something about an anti-serum. I really couldn't make sense of the words. I could hear everyone speaking, but I could not process the syllables. I could see the faces around me, but I couldn't focus on them. I suppose I'll just have them fill me in when we meet at Four's in a few days.

Anyway, after the meeting, and the train ride back to Dauntless, and after I climbed into my lumpy dormitory bed with Tris's head tucked under my chin, I just laid there listening. I listened to Tris's even breaths, to the squeak of mattresses as sleeping bodies shifted, the occasional heavy breathing, crying, or screaming from another initiate's nightmare. There seemed to be more nightmares than usual last night, no doubt because of yesterday's fear simulations. I tried to push every thought from my mind, to just stop thinking. It didn't work.

Why didn't he take us with him? Why couldn't he let us know he was just going away, and wasn't dead? How does someone just leave their children? Didn't he love us?

But then, he must, if he is trying to help us, right? It didn't seem like people usually managed to get in contact with Natalie after they'd been relocated. Will he try to come and help us? Will I ever see him again?

Emotions I didn't understand swirled within me, a big jumble of anger, confusion, sorrow. And something else I just couldn't seem to name. I gave myself the night, until people around me began to get up and ready for the day, to drown in my feelings. Because today I have to pretend everything is just fine. I'll go through with the prank I was planning to pull on Peter, I'll joke with my friends, maybe if I'm lucky I'll sneak home or to Zeke's and take a nap.

First thing I must do is today's training. I'm hoping I'll be one of the first called so I can pull off this prank. Everyone's sitting in the hallway again, waiting for the first name to be called. Everyone's especially quiet this morning. I guess yesterday's simulation sobered everyone up good.

Act normal, right? "Hey Peter," my voice echoes in the empty hall, so I lower the volume slightly as I continue. "So, how did your sim go yesterday? Let's take bets on how long you took. We know based on what you did to Edward that you're a _coward_ "—I spit the accusation at him—"so I'm gonna say it probably took… what, about twenty-five minutes?" I glance around and see most of my friends smirking. "Any other guesses before Peter tells us who wins?"

"Eighteen," Tris says. I think she's giving him too much credit. Peter is scowling at a scuff on the stone floor.

"Twenty-nine minutes," Lynn smirks.

"I don't know, I think he's better competition than that," Kate, another dauntless-born, says. "I'll go with twelve." Kate gives me this look, like a smirk that's almost an accusation or a challenge. Like she thinks her guess, if right, would make me unsure of myself. Obviously she has no clue how fast my time was. Something about her stare makes me uncomfortable—Kate and I hooked up once a few months ago, and there's been a weird tension ever since.

No one else says anything so after a minute, I ask. "So who wins, Peter? Who was closest? We're going to find out averages at the end of this stage anyway, no point in hiding it."

"The Stiff won," he mutters. "Twenty minutes."

I laugh. "Well, I guess I don't have to worry about _you_ knocking me down from first, then, pansycake." I'm not usually such a jerk, but I really can't stand that kid.

Four finally opens the simulation room door, and for once, I've lucked out. "Uriah," he calls out in a monotone.

A few minutes later, I'm in the weird chair wincing at the pinch from the needle. "You look like crap," Four mutters to me. _Thanks, asshole._ I scowl. I know I need an attitude change but Four's flirting with Tris has gotten pretty old and I don't need to worry about one more thing right now.

* * *

I close my eyes and the simulation pulls me under.

Even before I open my eyes, I smell dust, metal and sweat. I open them to find myself in the training room. The targets are all set up, and Zeke, Mom and my father—looking just how I remember him before he disappeared when I was four years old—stand in front of the targets. Eric stands to my right, his face stretching into a sinister grin. There's a gun in his hand, and there is another on the table in front of me.

"Uriah," he hisses, "to become a member of Dauntless, you must prove your loyalty." He knows. He knows I'm divergent. "Shoot them." I hear a click, and turn to find the gun in Eric's hand is now pointed at me, inches from my skull.

My family's cheeks glisten with tears, and their eyes beg me not to do it. I look at Eric again. His eyebrow has one ring in it. Last time I paid any attention, there were three.

This isn't real.

What would a Dauntless do? Even someone entirely Dauntless wouldn't want to shoot their family. Maybe I try to get out of the situation entirely.

My breathing quickens as I look at my mother, then Zeke, then stare a long time at my father. His eyes are a rich chocolate brown, like my own, and they shine with defiance. "Shoot them!" I hear Eric roar beside me.

My hands shake as I gingerly pick up the gun with them, staring at it turned on its side in my loose grip. I turn it to face ahead of me and raise it. I aim it at Mom, close my eyes. Silently I count down. Three… two… one.

In an instant I've turned the gun toward Eric but I'm not fast enough. I hear a bang and a crippling, sharp pain in my head for a fraction of a second before I drop into nothingness.

* * *

I sit in the chair with my eyes closed, focusing on breathing in through my nose and out through my mouth. This sim was a lot worse than yesterday's. I already had enough on my mind. Four doesn't say anything, he just sighs.

I finally get up and make my way to the door without looking at him. Just as my fingers touch the door handle I hear, "you gonna be okay?" I glance at him and nod as I exit the room, stopping in the hallway and leaning my forehead against the wall after I hear the door slam shut. I give myself another minute to be ready to fake it and finally, with one deep breath in and out, push off from the wall and head toward the dormitories.

Since I was first, I don't have to worry much about anyone coming in for a while. I pull out the drawer under my bed and push aside the clothes that I've haphazardly thrown in without bothering to properly fold them—who has time for folding clothes when there are so many more fun things to be doing? Finally I uncover the paper bag and grin as I slam the drawer shut, pausing to open it a bit and tuck shirt sleeves and pants legs that had tumbled over the drawer's side back in.

Next stop is the transfer dormitory. I glance around on the short walk between the two dorms. I hear footsteps and freeze. The person rounds the corner and I grin when I see her. It's Shauna. I playfully look up at the ceiling and whistle. Shauna cracks a grin. "Well, clearly you aren't up to anything you shouldn't be, are you now, Uri?"

"Of course not! But if anyone asks," I answer, "I was with you by the chasm." I wink.

Shauna laughs. "Don't get yourself into too much trouble, prankster." She moves on and disappears down the hallway.

There's no more time to waste. I pick up the pace, enter the transfer dormitory, and quickly find Peter's bunk. Pulling out his drawer just as I did mine, I dig through until I find his toiletries, carefully this time—I don't want it to be obvious that anything has been messed with. I check to make sure I don't have company one more time before I quickly remove the shampoo bottle's cap, then pull the pink bottle out of the paper bag I carried in with me, uncork it, and dump the contents into the shampoo. After a quick shake, I put everything back and return to my bunk in my dormitory room, hiding the bag and empty packaging under the top layer of trash in the can on my way.

I don't remember falling asleep, but when I awake, I hear a couple guys' voices in the room and Tris is pressing herself against me with her head on my shoulder. I smile slightly. "Hey," I mumble.

"Shh, let's just take a nap," she whispers. Moments later, I've drifted back to sleep.

* * *

I'm feeling a lot more like myself by that night. I napped for several hours and Tris was gone when I finally got up. I spent some time in the training room and eventually met back up with her at dinner. I didn't want to talk to my friends, so I didn't. Well, I did want to, but not when I couldn't even tell them about everything that was bothering me. Besides, things are so messed up with Marlene, and Lynn has been weird. I don't blame her. It sucks being stuck in the middle. It's happened to me plenty of times when Marlene and Lynn have gotten into their catty disagreements, as girls do.

Tris and I are laying in the net together. It's nice, but there's a weird tension I haven't felt with her before. Just what I need, for something else in my life to be broken.

Above us, the sky is black. I see no stars, no moon. It's a lot darker in the net than the last time we were here.

"How are you handling… everything?" Tris finally asks, breaking the silence.

Everything? I don't know. I can't focus. I can't think. I'm confused and angry and hurt. So I shrug. "I don't know. There was enough to worry about before the news I got last night. I think my brain has just shut down at this point." She sighs and rolls toward me, resting her head on my shoulder. "I just wish he would have taken us with him. And I wonder if I'll get to see him again someday. But I'm mad at him. I don't even know if I'd be happy if I _did_ get to see him again." I wrap my arms around her tiny figure.

"I think you would, if you had enough time to get used to the idea first, don't you?"

I shrug again and sigh. "I don't know. Maybe. I can't even talk to my best friends about it." I miss Marlene. She has been my best friend for so long. She knows me even better than Zeke. She'd understand how I feel and help me make sense of it. Sometimes I think she knows me better than I know myself.

Tris sighs. "I know I don't have any experience with losing a parent, let alone finding out something like this. But I'll listen." Her fingers gently run through my hair. I sigh and close my eyes at the relaxed feeling it I get from it. "You've got Zeke, who definitely gets it. And Four."

I snort. "Four. Right." My eyes are open again and my muscles tense back up.

Tris shifts, looking up at me with furrowed brows. "Is something wrong with you and Four?" Does she really not notice? She can't be that oblivious, can she?

I raise my eyebrows. "Don't tell me you haven't noticed the way he looks at you," I scoff.

She looks like she's trying to solve a Rubic's Cube, the way her face is scrunched up. "The way he looks at me?"

I can't help laughing. It's a humorless laugh and Tris shrinks back. I am not acting like myself and I can't seem to help it. "Oh yeah. He's always looking at you all goo-goo eyed. And touching you too long, and standing too close to you…"

Tris just rolls her eyes. "You're seeing things. He does not. He wouldn't want someone like me."

I exhale my breath in a quick huff, but hold my tongue. I know Tris doesn't think she's pretty, but I'm not seeing things that aren't there—she definitely is attractive. (Beautiful, really. Just not 'pretty' in some cliché, classic, or over-done way. But I'll clearly never convince her of that. I've tried.) Then there's the fact that she's the _only_ other person in this entire faction, besides Four, who is from Abnegation. And the way he looked when he walked in on us in my room at Mom's. The way he hugged her too long after his fear landscape… the way he stood so close to her after her first fear simulation, I think he might have leaned down and kissed her if I hadn't come around.

But I don't say any of that. I don't say anything at all.

* * *

The tension hasn't really eased off any when we stumble across our friends in the pit a half hour later. So we pretend, though Will shoots me a questioning look. Probably just because he knows I can't be okay. And I'm not, yet. But no one else notices.

I numbly follow along with Al, Will, Christina and Tris. As we approach the chasm, my mouth waters at the sight of the dark bottles in the hands of some guys hanging out there. I'm either going to ask for one, or go buy a bottle of liquor in a minute, I think, because I need to get out of my head for a while. Yeah, yeah, maybe drinking isn't the best solution to my problems, but I don't really care, I just want to stop thinking for a while and alcohol will help me do that.

But then I see who it is. A few guys from my brother's initiation class—one of them is Jake, who works in the control room with him—and, _of course,_ Four. I don't want to be here right now. Not when I was _just_ … disagreeing, I guess… with Tris about him not an hour ago. I turn to Will to ask him if he wants to go get some booze and go up to the roof. Just as he agrees, I look back and, well, who coulda guessed? Drunken Four is heading this way, looking all bright eyed, calling out my girlfriend's name. Great, just great.

She takes several steps forward to meet him. I warily watch him flirt with her, joking about how stupid it is of him to be drinking by the chasm. Everything in me is straining to separate the two. I can guess how that would go down. Tris has a stubborn streak, I can see it in her eyes. She'd just think I was being paranoid or possessive. But Will sees it and he's moved to stand closer to her, almost right next to her, when I see Four lean in and whisper something to Tris. Will must have heard because he immediately glances back at me, frowning, clearly uneasy.

I walk closer, finally, and barely hear Tris over the chasm. "Do me a favor and stay away from the chasm, okay?" she says with a laugh.

"Of course," Four says, and before he turns and walks back to his friends, he winks. Yep. _He fucking winks._ Tell me again, Tris, how Four wouldn't be interested in someone like you, huh?

We all catch back up to Al and Christina, and Will informs them that we'll catch them later. As we head toward a store to buy some much needed alcohol Will turns to me with a frown. "Just tell me. What did he say to her." There's no inflection in my voice.

"He said, 'you look good, Tris.'" I run my hand over my face. Well, she'd better not deny it the next time we discuss this, that's for sure.


	20. Chapter 20

_Somehow I didn't realize I hadn't edited this chapter and put it up yet. Sorry I took so long!_

 **Chapter 20**

My head pounds. I don't remember much of last night. I remember Will and I buying a bottle of whiskey, which I'm pretty sure I drank most of. I remember rambling on and on to Will about Tris and Four. When I finally came to bed, Tris must not have been here, because was early and was the only one in this bed. I guess since I wasn't here, she went back to the transfer dormitory.

Since stage two started, it has been harder to sleep. That's partly because of my own nightmares, and even more because of everyone else's. We're all woken up several times throughout the night to someone screaming. Fear sims are hell, and you can see it on everyone's faces in the dark circles and swollen bags under their eyes. Some handle it better than others. Tris, for example, still has that fire in her eyes that first made me notice her. Some of the initiates, like Sarah and Al, look like they are dead inside.

I was the fifth simulation today. Now I'm in the dining hall slowly eating a piece of chocolate cake, smirking at the scowl Peter had on his face this morning after his hair turned neon pink in the shower, with no sign that he knows for sure it was me. I think he might suspect it, probably does, but he glares at me so much on a regular day that it's impossible to judge whether he hates me more than usual, or not. That's okay though. If you're hated by Peter, you're probably doing something right in life. I rub my face with my hand, shivering as I remember last night's nightmares. Sometimes they're almost just like the sims, sometimes a variation, other times several can merge together.

Lynn slips into the seat next to me. Her hair is getting longer, and now she reminds me slightly of a fluffy baby chick. "Where's Tris?"

I shrug. "She isn't still waiting for her turn?" Lynn shakes her head. The sims should be almost over for the day now. "She was two before me. Mar and Luke were the only ones left when I went in."

Well, then. She must be spending time with her friends, I guess. Maybe when Marlene gets done, she and Lynn and I can hang out and we can try to repair our friendship. Only if it's the three of us, though. I don't want to be alone with Marlene again until we're back to normal. "Well, we should do something fun when Mar gets done."

Lynn raises her eyebrows. "I didn't know you'd want to see her."

I sigh, shaking my head. "Of course I do, Lynn, she's my best friend. I still want her to be my best friend. I just… don't want her as my girlfriend, you know?" As I see Marlene enter the dining hall I wave her over, and she hesitantly complies.

"Uriah and I were just talking about doing something fun," Lynn says to Marlene with a smile. Nicer than Lynn usually is.

"Oh…" Marlene looks away. "I guess I'll go find something to do on my own then."

She starts to get up, but I grab her arm. "No, we wanted you to come with us. So what should we do?"

She looks a little confused but smiles. "Hmmm… paint ball?" Lynn and I grin.

* * *

I put all the tension from the past few days aside and spend the afternoon playing with my friends and some other Dauntless-born. It's a much needed break from the stresses of my reality.

Tris is sitting at Four and Zeke's table, staring absently and slowly chewing her pasta, when I arrive back to the dining hall with Lynn and Marlene. I'm a patchwork of paint splatters—I haven't bothered to shower and change yet. I plop into the seat next to her, pull her into a quick, chaste kiss, and grin at her. "Wish I'd seen you after sims today—you missed out on a lot of fun. Bet you can't guess what we did," I tease.

"Gosh, if only there was some sort of clue." She smirks, looking my paint-splattered clothes up and down and picking at the dry pink paint in my hair.

"Well, I hope you didn't wear yourself out, because Four and I were thinking we should continue an old tradition and take the initiates out for a game of Dare tonight," Zeke says, rubbing his hands together, smiling like some evil clown.

"We're in!" I answer for Tris. Four ignores me and smiles at my girl flirtatiously as if I'm not even there. I put my hand on Tris's knee and rub circles with my thumb, and she leans a little closer to me. "So what did you do with yourself this afternoon, babe?" I ask before taking a big bite of my cake.

"Oh, nothing really. Just hung around the chasm…" she says vaguely, not looking at me. But I shrug it off. I trust Tris. "How does dare work?"

"It's just like truth or dare, but only the dare part," Four answers her. Tris nods nervously as Four and Zeke gather up their trays and trash before telling me to be ready in an hour and leaving the dining hall.

An hour later, I've eaten, washed the paint out of my hair, and, along with Marlene and Lynn, collected Tris and her little crew from her dormitory. When we arrive at the train tracks, we find Peter, Molly, Luke, Gabe, Kate, Aiden and Sarah, as well as Zeke, Four, Lauren and Shauna.

"Train'll be here in three minutes, so if the few others haven't arrived by then, we leave without them," Lauren announces.

Once aboard the train, tension is evident with Tris and Marlene staring each other down. I'm thankful when Zeke holds up a couple flasks, begins passing them around, and starts the game.

Zeke picks Gabe first. I cross my fingers that no one picks Four before me, because he's been pissing me off a bit lately and I know just what I want to dare him to do. "Climb to the top of the sculpture outside the Upper Levels building," Zeke says. Not particularly creative, but it'll do.

Soon Lauren, Molly, and Marlene have egged Candor headquarters, which everyone calls the Merciless Mart, eaten a beetle, and proposed to Eric, respectively. The flasks are half empty already. I'm buzzed but steady, but I have to hold Tris steady on the train as she sways unsteadily.

Marlene chooses Peter and her dare may be my favorite of the night when we're done. She dares him to get a tattoo—he gets to choose where, but Marlene gets to choose the tattoo. When all is said and done, Tori has tattooed the word PANSYCAKE in large letters on his back. I'm still snickering when we hop back on the train outside Dauntless.

Peter looks pissed as he scans the crowd. "Uriah." My head snaps toward him and he smirks. "Go into Erudite headquarters, moon them, and screen something obscene."

"Easy," I grin, moving to the train's door to watch for the Erudite sector to approach. When the brightly lit glass building comes into view, I jump, the rest of the crowd following behind me. I see Four steady Tris when she nearly falls on the landing, and I glare at him as I move toward her and wrap an arm around her shoulders. I never thought Four would be the kind of guy who flirts with another guy's girlfriend, but it's becoming very clear that he isn't as honorable as I thought.

Everyone waits together and I reluctantly break away from Tris when we're a few dozen yards from the glass building. Erudite headquarters is, of course, a giant library. I have never been here before. Everything is a white or pale blue. The exterior walls are floor to ceiling glass, and somehow it's spotless. In Dauntless, I think, kids would have that glass covered in fingerprints and nose prints seconds after it was washed. The lobby smells like musty books, though no one seems to be reading any actual books—they're all on tablets and computers. No one pays any attention to me, no one even looks up. They're all wrapped up in their work.

I make my way to the middle of the lobby and take a breath before yanking my pants and underwear down, wiggling my butt back and forth as I scream, "who wants a piece of my sexy ass?!" Everyone looks up, their mouths gaping open, and some scrawny guys that I think are supposed to be security begin to march toward me as I pull my pants up as fast as I can, nearly tripping because I run toward the door as I do.

When I reach the group, I stop them from heading back to the train—we're near where I want to go next already. "Four," I say, a wicked grin on my face. "I dare you to go zip lining."

His eyes flash with fear for a moment before he composes himself. "Yeah, why don't you ever do that, Four?" Lauren asks, puzzled.

Four shrugs. "I thought I'd do him a solid and give him a chance to when we know he has the time," I answer for him.

The look on his face… he knows I'm mad at him. Obviously. I know about his fear of heights. Tris and I are probably the only ones who do. Zeke shoots me a quizzical look, but he knows I've been through Four's fear landscape, so he figures it out pretty quickly. When I look at Tris she's sending me a hard glare. Seriously, Tris? The asshole has been flirting with her for a week even though he knows she and I are together, and she's giving _me_ a glare here? I roll my eyes and cross my arms.

Tris, Shauna and Zeke insist on going up to the top of the Hancock building with Four while the rest of us trek to the end of the zip line to form the human net to catch him. Really, they just wanted to get to go zip lining, too. Luke and Gabe make some comments about this being a lame dare for a guy with only four fears, but I know better. He's probably shitting his pants by now.

Tris shoots down the cable first. I'm glad, since that means there's no chance of her being alone up there with Four. The thought makes me uneasy. Like last time, Tris is strapped in head first, arms out like a bird in flight. She doesn't make a sound. Last time, I went after her so I didn't get to see her face as she came down the zip line, but this time I get to see her wide smile—I didn't know she could stretch her mouth into such a giant grin. Tris is always beautiful, but right now, I think, she's more beautiful than ever. Abnegation, for her, was like a cage, and she is a bird who was always meant to fly free.

She drops into the web of arms and I wrap mine around her once she's on her feet.

A few minutes later, I hear a loud, deep voice screaming. Loud. I snicker at the sound. Soon, Four is close enough to make out his face, and I see his mouth wide open, arms tucked in, eyes scrunched shut. His face is bright red as if he's been holding his breath, though based on his hollering, that's impossible. My snickering becomes hysterical laughter as he glares at me before dropping out of the sling.

I feel Four's glare on me for ten more minutes while we wait for Shauna and Zeke.

But now, apparently Four has noticed something he can use for revenge on me. "Kate," he says with a smirk. "Kiss the guy you like."

We're in the train car, and as Kate rises, she almost falls back over—clearly she's had more liquor than she can hold. I'm getting there, too, honestly. And maybe that's why I can't think and figure out what to do when she stumbles toward me with a seductive smile and falls right into my lap.

She's definitely uninhibited, thanks to the alcohol. And we've hooked up before, several months ago. It's been a bit awkward since, whenever I see her. Apparently that night meant more to her than it did to me. I just sit there with my mouth hanging open like an idiot. I can feel Tris's glare burning into me as Kate kisses me passionately while she slips one hand into my waistband. Yep. Her hand. Against my skin. Where it definitely should not be..

I know I took too long to react when I finally jump up, making her fall to the train car floor with a thud.

I look at Tris. She doesn't look at me. She just stands up, staggers to the door of the train car, checks her surroundings and jumps, with me chasing after her.


	21. Chapter 21

_I'm having trouble deciding exactly where I want to go with this so... ideas are welcome!_

CHAPTER 21

I stumble as my feet land on pavement. The train I just jumped out of rumbles past as my hands skim the asphalt, but I manage to get my balance back. Clouds block the moonlight and it's dark and eerie, but I'm used to seeing in the dark. Dauntless is always dark.

I spot long pale hair swinging slightly a couple blocks ahead of me and break into a run to catch up. This conversation is not likely to be rainbows and unicorns. This really isn't how I expected to end my night. I should have stopped that kiss a lot faster… definitely should have. I'd be irritated too probably if it had been Tris being kissed by Four, even if it was a dare, if she didn't try to cut it off quickly. But I was raised with very different ideas about showing affection than Tris was. She needs to adjust to it, faction before blood and all, but I get that it probably means more to her than for the rest of us.

I fall into step next to Tris. She glances at me for only a moment then continues to silently walk back to Dauntless. But I take it as a good sign that she isn't protesting me being next to her.

And now my mind is back to the conversation- or, more likely, argument- we'll be having in a few minutes. I didn't mean for that to happen. I just, I don't know. Four was giving her these looks and I was getting jealous.

Maybe that is the reason I didn't stop the kiss. Maybe I was just trying to make her jealous, even if I didn't realize it at the time. But somewhere in the back of my mind… yep, I'm pretty sure that's exactly what I was trying to do. So far it really doesn't seem to be working out to my benefit. First she seemed to feel like I was picking on him and his fear of heights, then Kate got that dare and kissed me… and definitely invaded my, uh, personal space… and I did nothing to stop it. If Four had made out with and pawed his hands all over Tris, and she didn't stop him as fast as she could, I'd be pretty pissed, too.

Damn it.

When Dauntless is in sight, neither of us has said a word, and it's making me feel like crawling out of my skin. Tris finally breaks the silence.

"We need to talk," she says flatly. Those four words are rarely good. As we enter Dauntless, she lets me take the lead at finding a good spot to have our… discussion. I end up taking her to Zeke's. I know there's no one there right now, because Zeke and all his close friends are out playing Dare.

A few minutes later, I find myself on Zeke's couch next to Tris, holding a beer I don't remember taking from the fridge. I guess it's just such a habit now that it's muscle memory or something.

Just as Tris opens her mouth to speak, I cut her off. "I'm sorry, Tris. I didn't choose for that to happen on the train, but I shouldn't have let it go on like it did. I think I was trying to make you jealous because of the whole thing with Four. I know what he said to you last night." I keep my eyes on my beer bottle as I pick at the label.

Tris bites her lip. "I know," she says simply, and I don't hear even a hint of anger in her voice.

Well, now I'm officially confused. What was the big deal if she gets it?! "You… understand?" I feel like a headache is starting behind my forehead from how much I'm scrunching up my face tonight. "Then why did you run off?"

She suddenly stands and starts like… pacing, I guess. What the hell is this about? "Tris," I say in the tone of voice like I heard a guy use with a nervous horse when we visited Amity once, "Babe, calm down and just tell me what's going on. I'm afraid you're going to chew a hole in your lip. Pretty soon it's going to start bleeding." With a huff she releases her lower lip from her teeth and rubs her palms on her legs. And… is she about to cry?! I get to my feet and wrap an arm around her shoulders, pulling her against me. Her arms hang limply at her sides, but she rests her head on my chest. "What happened, Tris? You're worrying me." My fingers trace nothings on her back, but her body stays tense. "Why did you jump off the train back there?"

My hand rises and falls with her back as she takes a deep breath and lets it out. "I was irritated about that girl and you, but really it was that I felt guilty."

My hand stops moving over her back. Someone dropped a rock in my stomach, I think. This sounds like a sitting down conversation, so i pull her back down onto the couch and just hold her hand, trying my best to look approachable and understanding, but serious. Apparently it works, because she keeps talking.

"I did hang around the chasm this afternoon, but um… Four took me down by the water." Down by.. What the heck is she talking about? The river is like really far down from the edge of the chasm, and I've never seen anyone down there. And more importantly… Four?! "He and Zeke, i guess, both know about how to get to the rocks by the river pretty much totally out of sight of anyone."

I'm a little hurt that Zeke has never shown me this secret place, but I can think about that one later. "So… just you and Four?" She nods. "What… what was…" I rub my face with my hands; I just can't even form the thoughts so apparently instead of saying nothing, my mouth is just going to sit there and stutter no matter how much I urge myself to just shut up and let her talk.

"I went as friends, you know? I mean, he's the only person here that's from home and I'd like to be friends."

"But…" I prompt her, dragging the word out.

"But… I guess you were right. He does like me."

I close my eyes. "And how did you find that out? It's not like you pick up on that stuff so easily, you didn't even see it when I told you he did." There's a lump forming in my throat. "And I just told you that last night, and today…" Looking up, I'm met with Tris's wide, round eyes and her lips slightly parted. She swallows thickly. I've never heard her sound so small as when she answers.

"He kissed me."

I freeze. My heart pounds in my ears and my fists clench. If I actually knew where they all were right now I'd go out and beat the crap out of Four. I thought he was, my friend, at least sort of. What kind of friend does that?! I feel like I'm in a fog as I find myself pacing around the room, rubbing my face in my hands.

"Did you kiss him back?" I stop and turn toward my girlfriend. I'm afraid of what her answer might be and hold my breath.

"Yes." I grab the whiskey and take a few gulps straight from the bottle as she continues. "I was surprised, and after a few seconds I stopped him and left."

Well, when she said she did kiss him back, I wasn't expecting her to say that she stopped it after a moment. My focus is on me and Tris now, not on Four. I'll deal with him later, but right now Tris is sitting in front of me and she's what I should focus on. I close my eyes and take some deep, calming breaths as I clench and unclench my fists. My heart is still pounding in my ears. Don't say anything until you're calm, Uriah. Delicate, warm arms wrap around my back and I feel Tris press herself against my chest. This helps.

"Why did you go off with him alone?"

She's silent. For so long it feels like another being pushing me away from her. I loosen my grip around her. I need to get out of here. She's not even answering me, and I'm getting mad, and I need to get out of here, or she does. My whole body is straining to run away.

"I don't know." Oh, she speaks. Finally. "I want him to be my friend, he's the only one from home. I really thought you were wrong about his feelings about me. I don't know why either of you are interested in me. It doesn't make any sense. You both could have someone so much better."

Oh, for Christ's sake. This again? I scoff. "I told you, Tris, if you could just see yourself through my eyes…" It hurts to see the tears escaping from her beautiful, round eyes. They're as gray as a stormcloud right now.

What do I really need to know? "Do you still want to be with me?" All my muscles feel like tightly coiled springs waiting for her answer, but there's a knot in the pit of my stomach because I'm dreading it too. I know what it will be. Why would she want to be with me now? It's Four. Of course she'll choose him. No girl would choose me over him. He's a Dauntless Prodigy, basically Dauntless's most eligible bachelor.

But she doesn't hesitate. "Yes." Her hands thread through my curly hair as she pulls my head down to capture my lips in a kiss. She's choosing me? She's really choosing me? Over Four?!

For this moment I forget all the problems and just kiss back, my hands moving up and down her sides. She's sorry, that's good enough. I slide them further down her body, grasping her thighs and lifting her up, so our faces are level. Her legs wrap around my waist and I push her into the wall for support as she gently bites my lower lip, and I can't help but moan. With her trapped between me and the wall, my hands are free again and they slide slowly up, my fingers finding their way under the hem of her shirt as I break the kiss and move my lips to her jawline. Her head tilts up, gasping as she gives me better access to her neck as my hands slide under her shirt. I feel her tense slightly, then relax, so I continue moving my hands up. I kiss each of the ravens on her collarbone as my hand reaches the bottom of her bra, and she moans.

And the door swings open, Zeke's loud voice filling the room and jolting me back to reality. I pause slightly but don't put her down yet. "-was awesome. Peter's lucky Eric didn't beat him within an inch of his life." I don't even care what the dare was, I don't want to, because I hear Four laughing then abruptly stop when he enters the room and, I assume, sees me pressing Tris against the wall.

We've both stopped and looked their way, and I gently put Tris back on the ground as every bit of anger that was coursing through me before is back.

Zeke is unphased by finding us in his apartment, but Four's face is priceless. His eyes are wide and his jaw dropped, then he narrows his eyes, his face turns red, and he presses his lips together as he clenches his fists. His eyes are on Tris as I cross the room and he's apparently so focused on her that he doesn't even try to stop my fist as it swings at his face. I don't think he noticed at all. That is, until my fist collides with his jaw.

"What the fuck, Uri?!" Zeke yells as Four expertly shifts to a fighting stance and swings at my stomach. Good thing I'm the first ranked fighter in our class, just like Four was, because the guy has never lost a fight. In recent years, though, neither have I. When I was a little kid, sure, but not in quite a while.

I block the punch and swing with my left at his nose, but he ducks in time. Somewhere in my mind I hear Tris yelling and pleading but I'm too mad to try to understand the syllables. Four tries to punch me in the temple, but Zeke grabs his arm, wrapping his other around Four's torso, pulling him back as Tris ducks between us and pushes me away from Four.

My breathing is ragged as she pulls me to the couch and sits me down. "Uri, stop. Calm down! Please!" she pleads.

Zeke is dragging Four to another corner of the room. I can't hear what he's saying to him, but Four stays where he is as Zeke crosses to the center of the room, glaring at me. "What the hell was that, Uriah?!"

"Why don't you ask Four?" I don't take my eyes off the backstabbing asshole in the corner and he glares back at me. Zeke looks at Four expectantly, but he doesn't speak. He just stands, stomps to the door and yanks it open, slamming it as he leaves.


	22. Chapter 22

**CHAPTER 22**

I wake with blond hair in my face and Tris's head on my chest. This is my favorite way to wake up. If only I didn't have this pounding headache from drinking a little too much last night.

I carefully slide out from under Tris, dig through my drawer for a couple pain relievers, and pad to the co-ed bathroom. We should have slept at Zeke's. Then I'd be showering right now without feeling like some girl is going to walk in and see my junk at any moment. I mean, that's not anything I would be particularly embarrassed about but still, makes it hard to relax.

I am trying to think about what I want to say to Four, but I don't seem to be able to put the words together in my head. Oh well, I guess I'll just have to say whatever comes to mind when I see him. I talked to Zeke about the whole situation last night. He pointed out that Four has never really shown particular interest in a girl before, so he is probably having a hard time figuring out how to deal with it. Which… whatever. He knew it was wrong when he kissed her. Hell, when he took her to some secluded spot in the first place. Did he plan to kiss her before he took her down there, I wonder? He didn't seem particularly regretful so my guess is yes. Anyway… Zeke said he's going to talk with Four, but that I, of course, should, too.

When I return to the dormitory everyone is still sleeping. I could try to fall back asleep, but I don't think that will happen. Instead, I decide to burn off some frustration in the training room. How lame is it that today of all days- a day off as we finished stage two yesterday- I _could_ have slept in but here I am, wide awake at six in the morning. I tape my hands and start working the punching bags. I try to put all my anger and frustration into each punch and kick, and the bag swings wildly as I do.

I lose all track of time until I hear the door creak and slam shut. I turn my head and of course there stands Four. Because this, apparently, is the way my life works these days. He's freaking everywhere. It's like the more he pisses me off, the more I run into him. I let out a deep sigh and scowl at him, then turn back to the bags.

"Practicing so you'll be ready to start another fight with me, Uriah?"

I roll my eyes. "I know you're like this Dauntless prodigy and all and you've never lost a fight, Four, but it's possible that I just might be pissed enough to beat you right now. I hope that instead, you can get it through your thick skull that Tris is _my_ girlfriend, and back the hell off."

He just stares at me for a while, then with a frown, he nods and starts on the bag that hangs a few yards away from mine.

I sigh. As mad at him as I am, I don't really like to hurt people. I prefer to keep the peace. It's the Amity in me, I guess. Four is Zeke's best friend and he'll be around either way, I might as well try to keep things amicable. "Look, Four. I know you like her and that's kind of a new thing for you. I know it royally sucks when you like a girl, and she's with someone else. I know she's the only one that is from where you're from, and she knows about your childhood and all that, so you probably feel some sort of connection to her."

He stops and looks at me as I pause to gulp some water. "Yeah, I do really like her," he says.

I nod. "I do too." I hit the punching bag a few more times. "Maybe when you're able to get past your… feelings for her… maybe then you guys can just be good friends. But I really care about Tris, I've liked her for a long time. Come on, man, you're better than this. Better than going after another guy's girl."

He nods slowly, not meeting my eyes. He reminds me of a puppy with its tail between its legs.

I sigh and unwrap the tape from my hands. "I'm going to go take another shower and see if Tris has woken up yet. I hope you figure out how to deal with all this. Far as I'm concerned, we're cool as long as you don't pull any more shit like you did yesterday." I look at him expectantly waiting for a response. This has been stress I really don't need right now. There's enough else going on without adding a fight over a girl, but I like Tris way too much to let it go.

"Yeah, Uri. I'm sorry. You're right, I knew it was wrong. I don't know what's wrong with me." He looks at his hands the whole time. Then finally he lifts his head and looks me in the eye. "I will respect your relationship with her from now on." I fist bump him before walking out of the training room without looking back, hoping that he meant what he said.

* * *

The rankings for stage two are revealed after lunch. There are no cuts after this stage; it's more like a progress report. When Lauren walks in carrying a chalkboard, the back of it facing all of us initiates so we can't yet see the results, Tris scurries to the transfers' dormitory where she will find another chalkboard with the transfers' rankings.

The nine of us- two Dauntless-born, Rita and James, were cut at the end of stage one- crowd around Lauren anxiously. She doesn't explain anything about these rankings; we all understand, well enough anyway, how the scoring system and cuts work.

Lauren flips the chalkboard to face us and hangs it on the wall in one smooth motion. I easily find my name scrawled in white chalk on the grass-green board, because it's at the very top. My mouth widens into a grin. First again! Our average simulation times are written next to our names as well and I notice that mine, at four minutes and fifty-five seconds, is almost three minutes faster than Lynn, who occupies the second-ranked spot. Marlene is in fourth, but barely: she's only five seconds behind Luke.

"Way to go, Uriah!" Marlene congratulates me.

"Thanks, you did well too! And Lynn!" I toss an arm over each of their shoulders and squeeze lightly.

"Yep, we're kicking some Dauntless ass here," Lynn grins. "Let's go celebrate now!"

I shake my head. "First I want to go see how the transfers did and grab Tris and maybe her friends too. Can we catch up to you in a few? Maybe meet in the dining hall?" Marlene and Lynn agree, and we walk down the hall together, with me breaking off from them as they pass the transfers' dormitory.

I stop in the doorway surveying the scene. Tris stands with Will and Peter, and the glare Peter is shooting at her sends chills down my spine and knots my stomach. Suddenly, he slams her against the wall. "I will not be outranked by a Stiff," he spits at her. "How did you do it, huh? How the hell did you do it?"

My body strains toward her, wanting nothing more than to pull Peter off Tris and make him regret ever touching her. But I stay still, for now, waiting to see how it plays out. Tris is not weak, not by a long shot. She may be half Peter's size, but I'm fairly certain she'd prefer to have a chance to deal with this herself.

I know how she did it. Tris did it the same way I did, by being aware in the simulations. I glance at the chalkboard. Tris is in first with an average time of two minutes and forty-five seconds, creating a monumental gap between her score and Peter's. At second place among the transfers, his average time was eight minutes. Tris is truly impressive in the simulations.

Will and Christina are third and fourth, respectively, in their group, and Al is dead last. I notice that his time is nearly ten minutes longer than the lowest ranked Dauntless-born. There's no coming back from that. He will be factionless when initiation finishes in a week, there's no doubt about it.

Peter pulls Tris forward and slams her against the wall a second time. I can see in her eyes that he's hurting her. Enough of this, time to act. Will and I lunge toward Peter at the same time, Will grabbing him by the collar as I push Peter away from Tris, stepping between the two so that Tris is behind me, like I'm a human shield. Will lets him go and my fist flies at Peter's face, landing a direct hit to his nose. Peter cups his nose in his hands and blood drips through his fingers almost immediately. His nose is probably broken. Good, he deserves it and worse. I may not like to hurt people, but everyone's got at least a _little_ bit of a sadistic side, and Peter is on the business end of mine.

"Don't touch my girlfriend again," I growl in the most menacing voice I can muster up.

Will adds, "Only a coward bullies a little girl."

Peter doesn't shut up, though. "A little girl?" he scoffs, pushing Will. Yeah, he knows better than to push me, it seems. "Are you blind, or just stupid? She's going to edge you out of the rankings and out of _Dauntless,_ and you're going to get _nothing,_ all because she knows how to manipulate people and you don't. So when you realize she's out to ruin us all, you let me know." With that, Peter storms away, Molly on his heels, probably to the infirmary to get his nose set.

"Thanks," Tris says quietly to both me and Will. I wrap my arms around her.

Will shocks me with his next statement. "Is he right? Are you trying to manipulate us?" Tris and I do have an advantage, but it's not something we can help. It's not like we're _trying_ to hurt anyone.

"How on earth would I do that?" Tris replies with a frown. "I'm just doing the best I can, like anyone else."

"I don't know," Will says. "By acting weak so we pity you? And then acting tough to psyche us out?"

What the hell? Some friend he is. "I beat Peter's time, too, by several minutes," I say. "I'm not as good as Tris, but still. Do you think I'm trying to manipulate you too? That I 'act weak'? Tris isn't weak and I don't know how you see her that way. She's one of the strongest people I know." I hug Tris tighter.

"I wouldn't do that anyway," Tris says, and I can hear the hurt in her voice. "I'm your _friend,_ Will."

Will doesn't say anything in response. He still thinks she's done something to cheat. I huff in frustration.

"Don't be an idiot, Will," Christina says, giving Tris a hard look. "She's not acting."

Will follows Christina out the dormitory door without a glance back. Tris and I are alone, other than Al. He's sitting on his bunk, all hunched over. Tris approaches him quietly. "Are you alright?"

"Sure," Al answers. It's obvious that he's lying.

"It's not over," she says. "You can improve your rank if…" Tris trails off just as she notices me shaking my head at her. He can't come back from this. I don't know, it _might_ be possible if he seriously rocked his Fear Landscape next week, but that's an extention, more or less, of the fear simulations. If he took almost half an hour on average in those… there is just no way. He's not going to go from being a coward to the bravest person Dauntless has ever seen in a week. He will be factionless. It's practically certain now.

"It's not that simple, Tris," I say gently.

"I know it's not," she says sadly.

Al looks at her, his eyes watering and chin wobbling. "I don't think you do," he says. "For you," he glances at me, "both of you, it's easy. All of this is easy."

"That's not true," Tris argues. She's right, initiation isn't _easy_ by any means, but Al is right, too. Compared to him, this has all been a walk in the park for me, and the second stage has been for Tris, as well.

"Yeah, it is," Al says. "You aren't helping me by pretending it isn't. I don't- I'm not sure you can help me at all." Tris looks crushed, exhausted, weighed down by guilt. She has no reason to feel guilty. She's braver than him, than all of them, and that's why she's first. That's the whole point! But this is Tris and she doesn't see herself that way, and she's too selfless for her own good. "I just want to be alone," Al says.

I can tell she doesn't want to leave him alone, but there's nothing she can do and she's only bringing herself down. When I grab her hand, lacing my fingers between hers, and gently pull her toward the door, she follows along willingly.

When we're a ways away from the dormitory, I stop and turn toward Tris, putting a hand on each of her shoulders and looking directly into her eyes.. "Look, Tris… initiation, it wears people down to who they are deep inside. You, you're brave, you're strong. Al isn't. Your friends, they're insecure and jealous. You aren't what they thought you were when they first met you. They saw a weak little girl from Abnegation, but that is _never_ who you have been inside. I've known that for a long time, and it's what has always drawn me to you. But the other transfers… they're just scared. You have no reason to feel badly."

Tris sighs. "Al isn't going to make it," she says, shaking her head. "I feel bad that I'm doing so well when this is so hard for him."

I nod. "I can understand that. But there are a couple things you should remember. First, Al probably should have gone to Amity, I can't for the life of me figure out why he came here. Second, _he_ made the choice to throw all his fights because he didn't want to hurt people. You and I don't like to hurt people, either, but we have to be prepared to defend the city. That's what all of us sign up for by choosing Dauntless. _We_ did what we had to do, and Al didn't. He started stage two in last place because _he_ chose to. In war, we will have to do plenty of things we don't want to do, but we will do them. You can't take responsibility for everyone else, Tris."

Tris nods, her lips still pressed in a straight line, and wraps her arms around me, resting her head on my chest. "Thanks, Uriah," she whispers.

* * *

It's funny. There are so many things that Tris never got to do growing up that I still am surprised by, even now that I have a better understanding of how stifling the Abnegation lifestyle is. Today's example: playing card games. I don't even mean just betting ones. She had never even played Go Fish. I don't know how she survived sixteen years there; I would have been bored out of my mind. And I _hate_ being bored.

"I win!" Marlene shouts, arms up in victory. "Okay, go on, Tris." Tris is telling Lynn and Marlene about Four throwing knives at her.

"So, Four intentionally nicked my ear, he says it was because Eric wouldn't have let me go unscathed. And Eric put his hand on my shoulder" she literally shudders "on his way out the door and says ' _I should keep my eye on you.'_ " Marlene and Lynn shiver now, too.

"Good thing Four has such good aim," Marlene says.

"Yeah," Tris says, "his aim with the handguns is perfect, too. It's like he can empty the whole clip and only leave one perfect hole in the target."

I'm still irritated at Four so I scoff. "It's not that hard, lots of us have great aim."

Marlene laughs then puts on her thinking face for a few seconds- the mischievous one where she grins at the end, reminding me of the Cheshire Cat. "I bet you can't hit a small object from one hundred feet," Marlene challenges.

Did she forget who the first ranked initiate was in stage one? "I bet you can't be as brave as Tris and stand there while I do it," I counter.

Marlene grins and reaches out to shake my hand. "Challenge accepted. Let's do it."

* * *

Fifteen minutes later, the four of us are walking the hall to the training room with a muffin.

"So, I thought you were going to bring Tris's transfer friends to hang out too?" Marlene says to me, raising one eyebrow.

"Tris is too Dauntless for the other transfers," I reply, nudging Tris playfully in the shoulder. She responds with a playful punch to my arm before I grab hold of her hand, beginning to rub my thumb back and forth on her palm as we walk.

Marlene smirks. "Well, at least you're not too 'Abnegation' to celebrate with us, Tris." I smile. Marlene is being a lot more friendly to Tris now. I think my hanging out with her yesterday helped a lot.

I pick up a pellet gun from the table near the targets and stick it in the back of my jeans waistband, smirking as I recall Tris's horror at our bet before we explained that we wouldn't be firing real bullets. The worst these little plastic pellets could do is leave a welt. I turn to Marlene. "Okay, go stand in front of a target." Marlene skips away.

Once she's in front of a target, Marlene balances the muffin on top of her head. I squint one eye as I take aim. I'm about to shoot when Marlene yells, "Wait!" After breaking off a piece of muffin and popping it into her mouth, she holds out her hand in a 'thumbs up' and through her half-chewed muffin shouts, "mmkay!"

I tune out Lynn and Tris's chatter as I aim again. Taking a deep breath then holding it, I pull the trigger. The muffin falls to the floor and Marlene doesn't flinch one bit.

"We both win!" Marlene cheers. Then she picks the muffin up right off the ground and starts eating it- and let me tell you, the floors in the training rooms are not clean. Not at all. That thing has to be covered in dust.

"Gross!" I yell. Mar shrugs and keeps chewing.

"You miss your old faction?" Lynn asks Tris.

"Sometimes," she answers. "It was calmer. Less exhausting."

"Initiation is supposed to wear us down to who we really are. That's what Eric says, anyway," Lynn says, raising one eyebrow.

"Yeah, Uriah told me that today, too," Tris agrees. I grin. "Four says it's to prepare us."

"Well, they don't agree on much." I let out a laugh. That's the understatement of the year. I have to say that generally I agree more with Four's version of Dauntless. Eric is just sadistic.

"Tris!" I call out. "Wanna spar?" She grins and I hand the gun off to Lynn, who begins some target practice herself, as we make our way to the mat. We're in stance, about to begin, when we are both distracted by the training room door opening. Shauna, Zeke, and- speak of the devil- Four walk in.

"I thought I heard something in here," Four says.

Zeke smirks. "Turns out it's my idiot brother. You're not supposed to be in here after hours. Careful, or Four will tell Eric, and then you'll be as good as scalped." I roll my eyes. They didn't seem to care about us being here after hours when I was helping Tris prepare for her fights.

Across the room I see Lynn putting away the pellet gun. Four steps away from the door to make room for us to leave and on her way out, Lynn says, "You wouldn't tell Eric." She says it as a statement but her tone is unsure.

"No, I wouldn't," he replies. Tris is the last one out, and as I discreetly glance back, I see Four raise his hand like he's about to press it to her back to guide her out, then think better of it and let his arm drop to his side.

As we round a corner in the hallway, I hear Four stop Tris. "Wait a second." I stop around the corner to listen. I'm ready to come around the corner and take him on if he tries anything.

He sighs nervously. "I just… want to apologize for yesterday. I put you in a really awkward position and it wasn't right. It won't happen again, I just hope we can be friends."

"Of course we can, I'd like that." I can hear the smile in Tris's voice. "I'll see you later, Four." And a moment later, she's around the corner and gives me a kiss on the cheek before lacing her fingers with mine.


	23. Chapter 23

_Hey friends :) Thanks for the reviews! I'm not good at these notes, I'm kind of shy, really, even when I'm hiding behind my computer... knowing that people are enjoying what I'm writing makes my day though! I know sometimes Uriah is kind of dumb, and Four can be kind of a jerk, they're only human. And teenage boys. No offense, teenage boys, but I haven't known any that can't be kind of stupid or kind of a jerk here and there. Just keepin' it real. And, since I haven't said it in a while... I own nothing._

 **CHAPTER 23**

I didn't think I would be able to fall asleep tonight. Last time rankings were revealed, Peter stabbed Edward in the eye with a butter knife. Today, Tris is the new Edward. Actually, I potentially am an 'Edward' too, as Tris and I are both ranked above Peter. I'm a lot more worried about Tris than myself, though; Peter is at least a little intimidated by me. I'm much bigger than Tris, and he hates her simply because of what faction she came from, even if she weren't ranked above him.

Tris is sleeping here in my dorm with me again tonight and she drifted off quickly. I lay awake for a while, but fell asleep much sooner than I expected to. Now, after just a few hours, I jolt awake… and feel nothing where the weight of Tris's body should be pressed against me. My hands automatically pat the mattress searching for her, though I know that there isn't room on this little cot for her to be in the bed without me knowing. I remember why I was worried and I am out of bed and slipping into sneakers faster than ever before.

My head whips from side to side, even though logically I know that if Tris were in here, she would be asleep, in bed, with me. I hurry to the transfers' dormitory to check for her there, even though the sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach tells me it's wishful thinking. My hunch is confirmed when I reach her bed, neatly made with hospital corners, smooth and untouched. My breathing quickens as I grab the flashlight Tris keeps under her pillow. Shining it around the room, I see that only two beds are occupied: Will's and Christina's.

I don't know which way to go when I reach the hallway. The training room is down the hall to my right; the Pit and Chasm are to my left. My hands go to my head, pressing against it as if I need to physically hold it together, as I try to think in the midst of what will soon be a panic attack. I have never had one before, but I'm pretty certain that's what is coming. Where would they take her? What's the worst, most urgent scenario? I try to slow my breathing, slow down my brain down enough to really think, and it comes to me. The Chasm. That's where I have to check first. I have to make it there in time. She has to be okay. She just has to. I don't know what I'll do if she isn't.

At first I am alone with the slapping sound of my sneakers against the stone floor, the hallway illuminated only by circles of dim blue light. Soon, another set of footsteps, heavier than mine, is coming toward me. I nearly collide with a huge figure in a ski mask. He glances back at me and runs even faster away from the chasm.

The roar of the water crescendos as I near the chasm. The sound gives me hope: the louder the water it is, the closer I am to making it in time to help Tris. I round the corner and the chasm railing comes into view, and for the first time in quite a while I am relieved to see Four. He is kicking the crap out of two masked figures. The smaller of the two figures has just collapsed to the floor, and Four is punching the taller one in the jaw. Between the one I saw running and the two Four is fighting, that means it was three against one. Tris is a pretty good fighter now, but she's like five foot two and one hundred pounds soaking wet. She's no match for these three brutes. The cowardice of these pansycakes is disgusting. But then I see Tris. It looks like in his anger at her attackers, Four didn't stop to pull Tris up from where she is hanging from the railing over the chasm.

I race to her as fast my feet will carry me and grab her under her arms. Even in this low light i can see that she is pale, and her breathing is ragged. She looks like she could lose consciousness at any moment and if that happened she would fall to her death. "Uriah," she cries out weakly. If I had woken up even a few minutes later, I might have been too late. I'm not convinced that Four would have come out of his rage enough to realize and pull her up. Just the thought has me fighting back the urge to puke.

She's so small and light. I easily lift her, pulling her knees up once she's over and holding her bridal style. "Tris," I pant, "I've got you. I'm here. I've got you." Her head flops against my shoulder and I see that one of the attackers is down while the other is quickly losing against Four.

"Four! Four!" I yell. He doesn't hear me. It's like he is totally zoned out, stuck in an alternate reality where the only thing that exists is rage. I have to get Tris out of here, so I will try one more time and if he doesn't notice, he can figure out where to find us himself.

"Four!" I shout as loud as I can. He finally looks up, holding an attacker by the collar as he pulls off the mask, revealing a very bruised and bloody Peter. I can see that the unconscious body on the ground is a woman: Molly. And based on who was missing from the dormitory, I know that the large figure I passed in the hallway was Al. Al, who was supposed to be Tris's friend.

"I'm taking her to Zeke's!" I yell, and Four nods. I carry Tris to my brother's apartment, only stopping to give Peter one hard kick in the ribs on my way past him.

* * *

I bang hard on Zeke's door with my foot. I have a key, but Tris passed out almost as soon as I started running here and getting out keys would require a lot more shifting her around than I'd like to do. She isn't in great shape at the moment. Apparently, neither am I. Tris may have felt light when I lifted her off the chasm railing, but after running with her limp in my arms for a while I could swear her weight doubled.

Zeke opens the door rubbing sleep from his eyes. "What the hell do- oh shit! What happened?!" He follows me to his bedroom where Shauna is lying awake in the bed looking annoyed. Thankfully, she's clothed. Shauna's irritation is forgotten as well as soon as she sees Tris's condition.

"Attacked at the chasm," I gasp. "Peter, Molly and Al. Three against one. I don't know exactly what happened. When I got there Al had run, Four was maiming Peter and Molly, and Tris was beat up like this and barely hanging on to the chasm railing."

Shauna gasps. "Why would they do that?!"

I look her in the eye. "Because Tris is ranked first." Her jaw drops. It really is almost unbelievable. Shauna and Zeke were unfortunate enough to have Eric in their initiate class, but even Eric wasn't this bad. Willing to kill the competition over a stupid ranking? Al was beyond redemption no matter how it plays out. Peter was all but guaranteed a spot in the top five. Molly is probably teetering between making it and becoming factionless, so she's the only one it makes even a little bit of sense for. And even then… getting into the faction of the brave by being such a pathetic coward that you'd kill someone for being braver than you are?

"I'll get the first aid kit," Zeke says before disappearing into the bathroom. I begin to look Tris over. She's got a big bump on the back of her head, probably from slamming it against one of the many stone floors or walls between the dormitory and the chasm. Her lip is bleeding and so is a gash on the left side of her forehead. It's not pretty, but it doesn't look like it needs stitches. A bruise is beginning to show on her opposite cheek, and when checking her arms and the lower part of her torso, I see a large bruise, already turning an angry purple, along her side.

Tris doesn't stir when Zeke begins to clean her cuts with a wet cloth and patch her up. I hold the ice packs Shauna brings from the freezer onto Tris's head and side. "I'm going to the control room to pull the footage," Zeke informs me. "You guys should just stay here tonight. Shauna and I can go to her place." He looks to Shauna for approval as he says the last part, and she nods.

"Thanks, Zeke." I hear him talk to someone for a moment on his way out the door, and when it shuts, Four wanders in.

"Are Peter and Molly alive?" I'm only half-kidding. The Amity in me seems to go MIA when it comes to Peter.

"Barely," he says. "Peter says they were only trying to scare her. At least I think that's what he said. He wasn't easy to understand. I think I broke his jaw."

I smirk. "Good." Four sits on the bed on the other side of me, watching Tris with a frown. "Think we can talk her into reporting this?" I ask.

I'm surprised when Tris shakes her head. She must be waking up. "What if they don't get thrown out? I don't want to end up in a worse situation. I feel like then I'd be letting them win."

"Tris…" Four says, already sounding frustrated. "If Zeke can get the footage, plus you have two eye-witnesses, I don't see how they wouldn't get thrown out. You could get them kicked out to the factionless. If you don't, you may have to always worry about Peter coming after you. Al won't make it, Molly probably won't either, whether you report them or not. But Peter is the dangerous one of the three anyway."

"Will you go to Max? Please?" I plead. What can I say that will convince her? Then it comes to me: play the selfless card. "You'd be helping keep me safe too. You know I would be their next target if they got wind of my sim times. Peter probably knows that I'm almost sure to outrank him as well. He just thinks you're the easier target."

Tris doesn't answer, but the furrow of her brow tells me that she's thinking hard about what I said.

"Thank you, both of you," Tris says quietly, "for rescuing me."

I laugh, but it's the humorless sort. The ironic kind. "Thank you for hanging on until we could get to you."

"Tris, can you tell us what happened?" Four asks, his tone much more soft and gentle than I'm used to hearing from him.

She nods and closes her eyes. "I was having trouble staying asleep. I woke up and decided to get a drink of water from the fountain in the hall. Around the corner, I could hear voices- Eric and Jeanine- so I stopped to listen. He was saying that he hadn't seen any sign of divergents, and she was saying how he had better not forget that 'finding them' was always his top priority."

"I guess there's our confirmation on whether Eric hunts divergents," Four comments.

Tris nods. "Then someone came up behind me and put covered my mouth with their hand. I was blindfolded, then they tied up my hands. They put tape over my mouth after I bit Al's hand." Note to self: if they need confirmation that it was Al, tell them to look for a bite mark on his hand. They dragged me to the chasm and I struggled the whole way there so they beat me. At some point my head slammed into a wall, which really hurts. Then…""

She's been calm the whole time talking about this up to now, detached; now, her voice is shaking, sounding like her throat is tight. Her eyes are squeezed shut tight, but tears still escape. "Tris." I feel like I have to approach her cautiously, like a wounded animal. "Babe, what happened? Would you rather just tell one of us?"

She shakes her head and takes a shaky breath. "They touched me," she whispers.

I freeze and my whole body goes ice cold. Four's reaction is similar. "Touched you," he repeats. I am going to kill them.

"Not like you're thinking. But almost." I am going to kill them. "They had me over the chasm and they dropped me when Four ran up." I swear, I will fucking kill them.

"Thank you for being there, man," I say, my hand on his shoulder. I can't really feel my hand on his shoulder, everything just feels numb, I just know that I put it there. For the second time tonight I feel light headed, but instead of panic, this is more of a fists clenched, seeing red, heart pounding rage. If Peter isn't made factionless for this and gets to stay here at Dauntless, I can't guarantee that he will live through the week. 'They touched me' echoes through my head over and over. I've been holding Tris's hand but now I just can't, I just, I have to do… something. So I just get up and pace around the room.

"Four, can you go report this?" I plead.

He nods and says, "if Tris says I can." Tris opts to wait for Zeke to come back and let us know about the footage, so Four goes to see if he can help. Shauna went back to her own apartment a while ago. As my breathing and heart rate begin to slow to a normal rate- which reminds me of fear simulations- I stop pacing and lay down with Tris on the bed. She lays on her left side- the side without the big bruise- with her head on my shoulder and my arms are wrapped around her. We're both awake, but we lay there in silence.

I feel like I can't quite get myself calmed down. I'm just slightly amped up still. I could have lost Tris tonight. She could have died. She could have been raped. All I can think of is beating the shit out of Peter, even though I know Four already took care of that. Did he somehow not understand what I said to him today? You don't fucking mess with the girl I love. Wait, what?!

The human mind is interesting. Sometimes it's like we lie to ourselves and have no idea we're doing it, and then something just pops into our thoughts that totally shocks us. Things like… the word 'love.' It's a scary word. Admitting that you love someone… it's admitting the power they hold over you. Almost losing Tris tonight, that was probably the scariest moment of my life so far. It would break me. I look down and see that she has fallen asleep. I like watching her sleep. I know, I know, that makes me sound like a total creeper. She just looks so peaceful and her eyelashes are so long, I'm not sure why that's so fascinating to me, but it just is, and this is when I can see them best. Asleep, Tris looks so vulnerable, with her closed lids hiding the fire behind her eyes. It's like getting to see a different side of her that she keeps hidden the rest of the time. In the day, she is fierce, but when she's asleep, it's almost like an innocence, one that is so easy for me to forget when I always see her as being so strong.

I'm in love with Tris Prior, and I will do whatever I must to protect her.


	24. Chapter 24

CHAPTER 24

Sleeping in a queen sized bed with Tris proved much more comfortable than sleeping with her in my arms on a lumpy, narrow dormitory cot. I also finally got that private shower that I was wishing for yesterday. I put on the shorts I wore last night and steal one of Zeke's shirts from his dresser before rifling around and pulling out some clothes Shauna keeps here and putting them on the bathroom counter for Tris. When I check on her again in the bedroom, she's still laying in the same position, but her eyes are open, staring at the wall.

"You look pretty badass with the cuts and bruises, but let's not make that a habit." Tris jumps slightly at my voice and her eyes follow me to the bed, where I lay down on my right side facing her. "You're still beautiful, though."

Tris half-smiles. "This bed is soooo comfortable."

I laugh. "I was thinking the same thing. I've missed having a normal bed these last few weeks."

"The ones in the dorms aren't really any worse than what I slept on at home. Abnegation beds aren't that comfortable. This one seems to have a padded top, it's amazing." The things she discovers always make me smile.

"How are you feeling?" With a feather-light touch, I trace the bruise and cuts on her face. Even as light as that was, she winces slightly.

"I feel like someone attacked me last night." I laugh and shake my head.

"How's your side?"

"Only hurts when I breathe. So as long as I avoid that…"

I chuckle. "Peter would throw a party if you stopped breathing. As much as I'd like to tell you I wouldn't show up, we both know that I would never pass up an opportunity for cake." She playfully punches me in the arm. I lean over her and steal a tender kiss. That cut on her lip still looks a bit sore.

"Did Zeke or Four ever come back and let you know about the camera footage?"

They may have, but I fell asleep not long after Tris. "No, not before I fell asleep anyway. I left some of Shauna's clothes in the bathroom for you; you can go ahead and shower and I'll track one of them down. But please, just wait here for me, okay?" After last night, I'm sort of afraid to let her out of my sight. She nods and groans as she pushes herself to a sitting position. I wait until I hear the bathroom door shut before making my way to Shauna's apartment. It's pretty near Zeke's place, so I decided to try to find him first.

Zeke rubs his eyes and yawns as he lets me in. Dark purple circles under his eyes suggest that he didn't get much sleep last night, and I'm hoping that will mean that he was able to find the footage. I run my hand through my hair nervously; I'm still anxious from what happened last night. "Morning. How's Tris doing?"

"Morning, big bro. She's alright. Tris was hoping I could get an update on the camera footage."

Zeke yawns again. "Yeah, I isolated and saved it and loaded it to a flash drive. You can't really see who is attacking her in the footage, but with you and Four both as eye witnesses hopefully that won't matter. Four is taking it to Max and reporting the whole thing sometime this morning. Before breakfast, if he can manage it."

I'm so relieved at Zeke's update. I don't think Tris would report it without footage as back up, and it scares the shit out of me to know that Peter is still roaming around the compound, probably with a pocket full of butter knives.

"You doing any better this morning?" Zeke asks. "I could tell you were pretty panicked last night. I haven't seen you like that many times."

"I don't know, man," I answer, shaking my head. "That scared the shit out of me. Like, I'll be surprised if it isn't in my fear landscape. I swear, if I had pulled her up from that railing a minute later… well, I think she would have probably already been at the bottom of the chasm. All I can think is, what if I had taken a little longer to put on my shoes, or decide where to look, or if Al had run into me and knocked me down instead of running past me, or if I had stopped to catch him? If any of those things happened I might have been too late. Four was off in lala land in his rage, he didn't seem to even register that she was hanging there." I run my hand over my face. It seems to help me shake the anxiety off a bit.

"Those things could have happened, but they didn't, Uriah. You and Four both made it in time, she's safe. All the help you gave her with learning to fight probably bought some of the time she needed until you got there, too. You did good, Uri," Zeke says as he pulls me into a hug. "I see how much you care about her."

I am smiling a little as I look away. I'm blushing. Actually freaking blushing. How does this girl do this to me?! "Yeah, I do." I play with the lint in my pocket.

"Mom's out at the fence for the next week or so. You and Tris should stay at the apartment while she's gone, as long as Four says it's alright. Seems it's dangerous to have a high rank and sleep in the dormitory."

I snort. "Yep. That's a good idea. Okay, I had better get back to Tris with the update, let her know Max will probably want to talk to her."

When I get back to Zeke's place, Tris is sitting on the couch waiting for me, her damp blond hair pulled into a high ponytail. I smirk when I see Shauna's clothes on her. Tris is about six inches shorter than Shauna and so thin. Shauna's clothes hang off of her, looking slightly silly. Better than Zeke's clothes would look on her, though.

I pull her up from the couch and we walk hand in hand to the dining hall. I update her about the footage and report on the way. Tris still seems nervous about reporting it, but she's not arguing about it, which is good since Four may already be in Max's office reporting it right now.

We stop in front of the doors to the dining hall, and I hold Tris's eyes in my gaze. "Tris," I say, "we don't know for sure how this is going to play out, with reporting it to Max. You are probably safer acting like they scared you. Pretend to be vulnerable. I know it feels like they've won if you do that, but it's more important to be safe right now. I can't stand the thought of losing you, Tris."

Tris scoffs and looks away. "You think I have to pretend to be weak and vulnerable?"

I gently cup her chin in my hand, turning her head to look at me. "Yes, Tris, I do. You're the strongest person I know, and the bravest, and that is why they are so threatened by you. I don't like this any more than you do. If I could follow you around to make sure this didn't happen again, I would, but I can't always be there, and neither can Four. So for now, just play this out, okay? You and I know they didn't succeed and you're not weak, but for now, please let that be our secret."

She nods, and the look in her eyes becomes harder, as if just hearing me tell her she is strong brought more of that strength to the surface. As we walk in, I whisper, "Stay close to me, so you look like you are relying on me for protection." She huddles into my side, not in a confident way, but timidly. I pick up muffins and glasses of water for both of us before leading Tris to sit across from Will and Christina. I don't see that coward, Al, anywhere. Peter and Molly are nowhere in sight, either. They might still be in the infirmary, with all the damage Four did last night. I slide in next to Tris, wrapping one arm around her shoulders protectively before I begin to pick at my muffin with the opposite hand. Marlene and Lynn see us and move from Zeke's table to ours, staring at Tris like a freak show exhibit.

Everyone stares at Tris's beaten-up face with wide eyes. Will leans in and lowers his voice. "What happened?"

Tris clenches my knee with her hand as she answers. "Peter, Molly… and…" Her voice cracks. "...and Al."

"Oh God," says Christina, her eyes even wider than before. "Are you alright?"

"Not really."

"Three against one?" Marlene says. "That's not fair."

Christina snorts. "Yeah, Peter's all about what's 'fair'. You do remember that he stabbed Edward in the eye with a damn butter knife, right? Al, though? Are you sure, Tris?"

"It was him," I cut in. "I saw him."

"It has to be desperation," says Will. "He's been acting… I don't know. Like a different person. Ever since stage two started."

Just then, Peter and Molly limp into the dining hall. Even though I saw how bad they looked last night, I'm still not prepared. The others notice my startled stare and gasp when they see what I'm reacting to.

Both Peter and Molly are more black and blue than they are flesh-colored. Peter has a cut running through his eyebrow and a split lip, and Molly's arm is in a cast. It's obvious that they're in a lot of pain and I can't help feeling satisfied.

"Did you two do that?" Lynn asks with a smirk.

Tris shakes her head as I answer, "Four had already found them before I got there. He took care of those two, Al got away, and I pulled Tris up. She was barely hanging onto the railing of the chasm."

Christina gasps. "They were going to kill you?"

"Maybe," Tris replies. "They might have been planning on dangling me over it just to scare me. It worked."

"Zeke got the footage, Four is reporting it. So we just have to hope…" I say.

Four stands up and moves between the tables, commanding everyone's attention. He tells the transfers to follow him for training- introducing the fear landscape, probably. We will probably be doing the same just a little after them. As Tris and the other transfers get up to follow Four, I give Tris a chaste kiss and tell her, "be careful."

I shoot a look at Will and he has no trouble reading me. "Don't worry," Will says. "We'll protect her."

I sit back down with Lynn and Marlene once Tris disappears out of the dining hall. Lynn scowls into her muffin. "Max had better do something about Peter," she grumbles. "None of us are safe with him around. Sure, we know how to take care of ourselves, but he teams up, and he attacks people when they sleep. Coward."

Marlene shakes her head sadly. "Tris doesn't deserve that. I'm glad you and Four found her in time, Uri."

I stare into the remainder of my muffin as I pick at it. "It was the scariest moment of my life. I almost had a panic attack. I almost didn't get to her in time." Lynn squeezes my shoulder gently and Marlene gives me a sympathetic closed mouth half-smile.

"Everything will be okay, Uri," Marlene assures me. "All of us will watch out for her. Christina and Will, and the three of us. Four, Zeke and Shauna, too, I'm sure." I nod, but I don't feel any better. Even once we make it through initiation, we still have to survive a potential war. But I can't say that to Mar and Lynn. Four was adamant that we not bring anyone else in on that. So I just sigh and rest my head in my hands, propped on the table by my elbows.

* * *

As expected, Lauren took us up to the fear landscape room about a half hour after the transfers left the cafeteria. I kind of zoned out while she explained it all. I've already been through a fear landscape, though it was Four's, not my own, and been trained how to do it. When we're released, I hurry down to the dormitories to find Tris. I am surprised to find her sitting on my bed in the Dauntless-born dormitory with Christina and Will.

"What are you guys doing in here?" I ask, surprised.

"Al," Christina replies.

My fists clench and I can feel my blood pressure rising. "What did he do?" I ask through clenched teeth.

"He wanted me to forgive him," Tris says softly. "I said I wouldn't and that if he ever came near me again, I would kill him."

Forgive him?! He can't be serious. He tried to throw her off the fucking chasm and the next day he is asking her to forgive him. "Stay here," I command in a tone that leaves no room for argument. I storm down the hall and into the transfer dorm where Al is laying on his bunk sobbing.

"Get up," I say harshly, pulling hard on his arm. He falls off the bed, landing hard on his ass, then scrambles to his feet. "Let me make this very clear, Al." He gulps. It's almost funny, because he's much bigger than me, but I think he's well aware that I can take him. "Don't come anywhere near Tris again. Ever. I will make you regret it if you do." He nods frantically. "You are a miserable, pathetic coward. Three against one? Sneaking up on her in the dark? She's over a foot shorter than you and like a third your weight! And there were three of you! What the fuck, man?!"

"I didn't ever want to hurt her… I… I don't know what's wrong with me." Tears are streaming down his face. "I'm so sorry… I'm so sorry…"

I can't be around this pansycake any more. I'm disgusted. "Just stay away from her," I repeat, shaking my head as I leave the dormitory.

* * *

Just after lunch, I am called to Max's office. I was playing cards with Tris, Marlene and Lynn when Lauren found me in the dining hall to summon me. Tris tags along- she'd like to talk to him anyway, and worst case, she waits for me in the hall while I talk to him.

I hold Tris's hand as we approach Max's office and knock on the open door with my opposite hand before entering. "Hi Max, Lauren said you wanted to see me."

"Yes, thanks, Uriah. Ah, Tris, i was going to send for you next." Max pulls out a folder of papers, probably some sort of incident reports. "Can you tell me what happened last night?"

I nod. "Tris and I are dating, if you didn't know that. So when she ranked first, after what happened to Edward after the stage one rankings, I asked her to stay in my dorm with me instead of hers. She did, but I woke up a few hours later and she was gone. I first went to the transfer dorm and shining a flashlight around the room, saw the the only people there sleeping were Will and Christina. Tris was obviously missing, and so were Peter, Molly and Al.

"I thought for a minute and decided to check the chasm. A very large person in a black mask ran past me on my way there, but I didn't stop him, because my priority was finding Tris and making sure she was safe. When I got to the chasm, I saw Four taking on two people in black masks. I looked for Tris and saw that she was hanging from the railing of the chasm. I pulled her up, got Four's attention and let him know where I was taking her. He pulled off the mask of the one that wasn't knocked out yet and it was Peter. I took Tris to Zeke's and she passed out on the way there. I wasn't about to take her to the infirmary, where Peter and Molly would be. We patched her up at Zeke's, she had a huge bruise to her left side, cuts to her lip and forehead, and a big bump at the back of her head. She woke up after about an hour, told us what happened, then she and I went to sleep while Four went to the control room to help Zeke get the footage for you. I think that's about everything."

Max nods and writes notes as I speak. Then he looks to Tris. "Tris, what do you remember?" She relays the same story she had the other night, including Peter touching her. My fists clench thinking about it.

When Tris finishes, Max writes for another minute, then drops his pen on the table and leans back in his chair, supporting his head with both hands behind his head.

"Well, Tris," Max says, "between the camera footage, your statement, and those of two eyewitnesses, I do still have to interview Molly and Peter and go over this with the other leaders. However, I am confident that they will be factionless by the time we are done with all that. There is plenty of evidence in favor of your story, and if there is doubt, I will contact Jack Kang at Candor to see about a trial with truth serum. I will let you know myself or through Eric or Four when a final decision is reached." Relief hits me like a tidal wave. There's still a little nervousness left as Peter hasn't actually been kicked out just yet, but this is a start. This is good.

"Thank you," Tris says, quietly.

"Let us know if you need anything else," I add as we walk through the door to return to our friends.

* * *

That night, Tris and I meet Will, Zeke, Shauna and Four at Zeke's place. Four has been in some communication with Natalie and Andrew. It's time to prepare for this attack.

"Sources- whether that only refers to Zeke and Uriah's dad, or others as well, I'm not sure- have communicated to Natalie that the attack will occur within a few days of Initiation. Likely that night or the next morning. When they start to give everyone these mysterious injections, we need to be ready for it to occur at any moment." Four is using his instructor voice. "This is Erudite's serum and program, and we've been told that we will need to go to Erudite to shut down the simulation."

"I can help with that," Will volunteers, raising his hand. That makes sense- he was raised Erudite, he can probably work well with computers and he knows his way around their headquarters.

Four nods. "Zeke, Tris and Uriah, why don't you three go to Abnegation. We don't want the people responsible for this to get away." I nod.

"What if we brought some guns with sim darts?" Zeke suggests. "Slow 'em down without killing them."

"Great idea. Can you be in charge of gathering those?" Zeke nods.

Shauna says, "I was able to get some of the antiserum. Just three. Any more than that and I would have likely been caught."

"That's fine," Four reassures her, "that's all we need. Three of us are immune to the simulation. It's just you, Zeke and Four that need the antiserum."

Shauna nods. "I'll go to Abnegation and help take down Max, Eric and whatever other traitors are there, if that's okay with you."

An hour later, we have a good idea of what we need to do to prepare and who will do what. Tris and I have one job in advance of the attack, and that is to hide the file that Natalie gave Four. She had given it to him because he is sort of the leader among us and initiates aren't supposed to leave the compound- Natalie suggested possibly hiding it at Amity. We all decided, though, that it would now be entrusted to Tris- kept in my mom's apartment until we can go hide it. If Tris and I sneak off, we could get into minor trouble, but it will just look like a couple of kids in love going off to do something fun together. Far less suspicious than Four sneaking around. Tris and I will hide it and tell as few people as possible where it is- probably just Four and Zeke. As long as one of the four of us survives this (the thought that any of us may not makes me shiver) the file can be recovered.

Tris and I are both exhausted when we fall into my bed at Mom's apartment. With a chaste kiss, we both almost immediately drift off to sleep.


	25. Chapter 25

**CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE**

Early in the morning, Tris shakes me awake. The bedside lamp is on, and the digital clock next to the bed reads 5:47. I rub sleep out of my eyes as I feel larger, rougher hands helping shake me awake, then Zeke's voice. "Uriah. Wake up."

My eyes adjust and Zeke, Christina and Will come into focus. It's a little odd that Christina and Will are with Zeke, but I can only assume that she didn't know where to find Tris and asked for his help. Christina's cheeks are streaked with tears and her eyes are red and swollen.

"Come on," she says. "The Chasm. It's Al." A leaden feeling settles into me, the weight of dread. Tris's eyes are wide in horror as I pull on a shirt and shoes and we run after Christina, down the halls, down the paths with no guardrails, through the pit to the Chasm.

Two men grunt as they pull something heavy up with ropes. A huge dark shape rolls over the ledge, landing on the Pit floor with a loud thump. Christina clings to Will, sobbing into his shoulder; I wrap an arm around Tris but she stands limp and numb.

The men turn the body over, and Al's head flops to the side. His eyes are open, lifeless. This kind of thing happens fairly often in Dauntless. I've seen the open eyes of the dead before. How did I never notice, never realize, that Al's eyes these last couple of weeks already looked dead, even when he was alive? They don't look much different to me now than the last time I saw him.

The rest of his face looks different, though. His lips are blue and his face is bloated and ashen from the cold water. Tris stares with wide, frozen eyes, her breathing becoming ragged, and I pull her into my chest.

"One of the initiates," someone behind us says. "What happened?"

"Same thing that happens every year," a different voice responds. "He pitched himself over the ledge."

"Don't be so morbid. Could have been an accident."

"They found him in the middle of the chasm. You think he tripped over his shoelace and… whoopsies, just _stumbled_ fifteen feet forward?"

Tris hears them too. Her body shakes in silent sobs and she begins to collapse to the floor. I catch her, pulling her up, holding her the way I did after _he_ tried to throw her into the chasm. "Tris, let me take you back to the apartment," I murmur in her ear. She nods through her sobs, keeping her face hidden in my shirt.

Someone brings out a large black body bag, but it will be too small. Al was a very large person. I press Tris's head into my chest to keep her from looking any more and turn, leaving the heartbreaking scene behind.

* * *

"It's my fault," Tris whispers hoarsely. "I should have forgiven him." It's the first thing she has said since we left the Pit. The last hour has consisted of Tris in my arms on my bed in Mom's apartment, at first sobbing, eventually silently staring at the wall, while I run my hands over her back and through her hair in an effort to soothe her.

I shake my head. "It is not your fault. He was depressed. You saw that the other day. We both know he wasn't going to make it into Dauntless and Al knew it, too. It's why he attacked you and it's a lot of why he jumped."

She shakes her head. "No, if I had forgiven him… if I had forgiven him, he wouldn't have done it."

"You don't know that." The funeral will be this afternoon. Every time someone makes the big jump, it's the same speech. Eric will stand in front of the faction and go on about how brave and courageous Al was, how he's exploring the unknown, blah blah blah and everyone will celebrate and use it as an excuse to get totally wasted. To be honest, I really wouldn't mind getting totally wasted tonight after what I just saw, either. "What do the Abnegation teach about suicide?" I have a feeling it isn't anything like how the Dauntless treat the matter.

"Basically, it's the most selfish thing you could ever do. Selfish and cowardly."

I am quiet for a while. Moments like this, maybe Tris _would_ be better off with Four. He knows how she was raised, would know how to bridge the gap between what she was raised to believe and what reaction she will be surrounded with. He has already had to do that for himself. I feel like I'm fumbling around blind. Maybe I can just ask her questions and see where it goes from there.

"What would your parents say about Al's death?" I ask.

"That I should have forgiven him," she whispers. I look down at her to see silent tears streaming down her cheeks and I swear my heart literally hurts. "I'm so selfish."

"No, you're not, Tris." I sigh. "You're human. You were betrayed by a friend. He asked you to forgive him like half a day after he tried to kill you. There is _nothing_ wrong with not being able to forgive him right away. Besides…" I tuck a loose strand of hair behind her ear and she looks up, into my eyes. "Forgiveness, I think, is more something we have to do for ourselves. _Al_ couldn't forgive _himself._ He didn't even give himself time to. You'll forgive him, when you're ready to. You will need to do that for your _own_ heart." She nods slightly. "Tris, what else would your parents say? I don't think they'd be placing blame on you right now."

She spends several minutes silently contemplating my question. I'm almost startled when she finally answers me. "I think they would say that everyone could have done more. That it's okay to feel guilty. And that we can use that guilt to remind us to do better next time."

I nod slowly. "So you can learn from it and someday maybe you can help save someone else, yeah? Al would have been factionless in a week. I think he would have jumped rather than live factionless anyway. You couldn't have stopped it."

"I just feel so selfish."

I make sure she's looking at me before I speak again. I want her to understand that I mean this. She is much too hard on herself. I wish more than almost anything that she could see how amazing she is. "You, Tris Prior, are the least selfish person I know. Maybe you didn't always think to do little dumb things like carrying a bag of groceries for someone or giving up your seat on the bus. So what? You're selfless when it matters. You let Four throw knives at you so Al wouldn't have to. You stood in front of Marcus's belt in Four's fear landscape, and I know that had to hurt like hell. You're sitting here beating yourself up for someone else's guilt after he literally tried to kill you. Tris. You're selfless, smart, brave, kind, strong… you're still human. Just like everyone else. Don't fault yourself for that. I don't. I love every bit of you."

 _Oh shit._ Tris freezes. _I didn't mean to say that. Not yet!_ I search her face, cringing inside. What if she totally gets scared and freaks out and leaves?! "I didn't mean to say that, Tris. I meant it, but I didn't mean to say it. It just slipped out. You don't have to say it back. Please don't get freaked out." I squeeze my eyes shut, maybe that will block all this out and I can pretend it didn't happen.

Tris relaxes against me. "I'm not going anywhere, Uriah."

* * *

I talked Tris into skipping the funeral. After talking to her about Al's death this morning, I knew that hearing Eric's speech would only make her more upset. Instead, we decided that with everyone at the funeral, this would be a good time to hide that flash drive the Priors gave us with the file on it.

We wrapped it several times in plastic and found some gray duct tape, so that we wouldn't be too limited in possible hiding spots. Tris and I are holding hands as we walk to the track. Eric should be beginning his speech any minute now. Something about coming out to the track with her reminds me of the night we played capture the flag, and we climbed the ferris wheel. She was so smart and so brave. Not many people would climb so high up that old thing.

"Hey!" This is the most enthusiastic I've probably sounded in a couple days now with everything that's been going on, but I'm pretty excited about the idea that just popped into my head. "Let's go to Navy Pier. Back to the Ferris Wheel. Remember kissing up near the top of the ferris wheel?" I nudge her arm with my elbow and she smiles at me for the first time all day.

"That sounds fun." I can see that she's a little confused and nervous though.

I lean down to her ear and whisper. "Amity is the first place they'd expect us to hide something like this. We can hide the flash drive on the Ferris wheel."

I laugh at the wide grin she flashes me now. "Come on, let's hurry up before we miss the train." I scoop her up and run with her in my arms, I know she's still a little sore from the other night at the Chasm.

We make the train with a few minutes to spare. I jump on first, then Tris, catching her toe on the doorway and stumbling into me. I pull her against me and slide down the wall of the boxcar until I'm sitting on the floor with Tris in my lap.

Our eyes meet, and a moment later her lips crash into mine. My hand presses against the small of her back, drawing her closer, and Tris threads her fingers through my hair. Tris pulls away and I stick out my bottom lip. Tris laughs as she changes positions. She settles into my lap again but this time, straddling my waist and I waste no time in pulling her against me once again, kissing her hungrily. I slowly unzip her hoodie as I kiss down her neck, uncovering her tattoo so I can press a kiss to each raven on her collarbone.

Tris sighs and my hands find her hips, grazing over her butt, my fingers squeezing her on both sides as she grinds against me. I graze my hands up her sides under her shirt, my palms grazing the sides of her lace-covered breasts. She pulls away, breathing deeply, and rests her forehead against mine with her eyes closed.

"Is there something wrong with me?" she asks suddenly. "That I'm not crying?" I know what she means: she feels like she should be thinking only of Al, crying over the loss, and instead she is spending the afternoon with me, having fun.

"Have you had many people close to you die, Tris?"

She shakes her head. I continue, "In Dauntless, we do dangerous things, and we're reckless. People die. When they do, we drink and do more reckless things and find ways for the good side of life to overshadow the grief." I shrug. "I guess it just means you're Dauntless."

After a pause, she nods. "We need to get off the train soon."

Tris stands and we both straighten our clothes and pat down our hair. Tris smirks at me. "Nice hair."

"Why, thanks. My girlfriend styled it for me. It's the 'making out in an open train car' look." I stand behind Tris at the open door of the train car, both of us holding the handles in each hand, feeling the wind whip at our faces. "Time to jump!" I call into her ear so she can hear me over the rumbling of the train and howling of the wind, then I let go of the handles and back up to give her space.

Tris jumps and I follow, both of us landing gracefully on our feet. "Lead the way." I tangle my fingers with hers and lead her the same route we took a few weeks ago for capture the flag.

The walk is quiet and peaceful. The trees thin as we near the marsh. "Sometimes when I was younger, when no one was looking, I used to climb this big oak tree at the edge of the meadow in Abnegation. I would just sit up high in the branches where I could see a long ways but no one could notice me," Tris says, breaking the silence. I can picture a tiny Tris scurrying up a tree like a little monkey. Her admission doesn't surprise me at all- she's always been Dauntless, I'm sure of it.

"I broke my arm once falling out of a tree," I say. "I used to climb the ones by the lower levels school but I guess I may not have been as good a climber as you. Or I just took bigger risks. I can totally imagine you doing that, though." Tris runs her thumb back and forth on my palm. The ferris wheel is coming into view. "I guess since your mom was Dauntless, it makes sense that you've always been kind of Dauntless, too, huh?" I grin at her. "I always knew you were different than the other Stiffs. It's kind of odd that no one seemed to notice that but me."

"My mom did, I think," Tris replies. I smile and nod in agreement. I think her mom probably always did. She didn't seem surprised by Tris transferring, and of course, she probably gets it from her mom anyway. Then she grins at me. "So you noticed me, huh?"

"You weren't as good at blending in as you thought, Trissy," I tease. "Well, here we are." The Ferris wheel and carousel aren't far now. Tris drops my hand.

"Race you!" Tris yells as she breaks into a sprint, giving herself a totally unfair head start.

"Hey!" I yell as I chase after her. "You're gonna pay for that, Prior!"

No matter how hard I run, I can't _quite_ catch up to her. We reach the carousel and she slows up so I grab her, throwing her over my shoulder. Her legs are in my left arm with her waist bent on my shoulder, her head upside down, and I carry her this way to the ferris wheel. She pounds on my back with her fists and tries to kick her legs, but she's giggling the whole time. I am quite pleased with myself; instead of crying and being angry about Eric's speech like she might have been, I actually got her to giggle. I'm glad I talked her into skipping it.

I dump her unceremoniously into the bottom carriage of the ferris wheel and slide in next to her. "So, you ready to climb this thing again? Last time was pretty scary…" I grin, but actually, it _was_ pretty scary when she almost fell. I tease her anyway. "You sure you're Dauntless enough for this?"

"I could ask you the same thing," she quips. "I mean, if you think I might not be Dauntless enough for this, you should be worrying a little more about yourself there, Amity."

I feign shock. "I cannot believe you just used that against me! Get your ass up there, Nose," I fire back, teasing her about her Erudite aptitude.

This time up the ferris wheel, maybe it being daylight makes us more confident, we chatter and tease each other all the way up to the platform. "How high do you think we need to go?" Tris asks, glancing up. The ladder seems fine, but when we climbed the wheel itself last time, that was when one of the bars broke and fell and Tris wasn't tall enough to reach the next foothold.

I squint upward. Maybe one of the carriages isn't even the best place for it. If someone got the wheel turned on, they could easily check all of them in a short time. "What if we go about halfway out and tape it to one of these beams?" I suggest. "Makes it a lot harder to get to and to see, I think. It would never be very near you from the platform or the ground. The flash drive is small and thin, it would just take a small piece of duct tape, right?"

"Brilliant," Tris says. "You shoulda been Erudite, Uri." I scoff. I know I'm not smart. I just get lucky sometimes, when one of my random ideas turns out to be good.

"Stop, you're gonna give me a big head."

"You already have a big head." Tris grins and kisses me, pulling away too soon. "Well, it was your idea, you wanna climb up and find a bar to put it on? Didn't go so well for me up there last time," she laughs.

"Yeah, yeah, fine. I'll be the one risking my life this time, but next time it's all you, Pansycake," I joke.

The climb is a lot less fun by myself. Once I get about halfway out from the center, I slide along a support across to the opposite side to make it a little harder to get to. The flash drive is small and already wrapped tightly in several layers of plastic. Tearing off a strip of duct tape, I attach it to the metal pole, then add two more pieces wrapping all the way around the pole to make sure it doesn't fall off. It doesn't stand out much from the surface of the support pole; From a distance, it should be hard to notice.

Making it back to the platform without any problems this time, Tris and I sit, silently watching the sunset. Tris leans into my side but faces me, cupping my chin in her cheek and turning my head to face hers. "Uriah," she whispers. "I love you, too."

Less than a week from now, we will be Dauntless members. In less than a week, we may have stopped a war, or we may have failed and be in the midst of one. In less than a week, one of us may have lost the other. But tonight, we are here where it is safe and quiet, where it is just us, and everything is perfect.


	26. Chapter 26

**CHAPTER 26**

"Two years ago," Lauren says, "I was afraid of spiders, suffocation, walls that inch slowly inward and trap you between them, getting thrown out of Dauntless, uncontrollable bleeding, getting run over by a train, my father's death, public humiliation, and kidnapping by men without faces."

All the initiates, Dauntless-born and transfers together, are gathered outside the fear landscape room. The whole group stares blankly at our instructor.

"Most of you will have anywhere from ten to fifteen fears in your fear landscapes," she continues. "That is the average number." I know I have at least seven, as that's how many fear simulations I've been through and they were all different.

"What's the lowest number someone has gotten?" Lynn asks.

"In recent years, four." Obviously. Doesn't Lynn know where Four's nickname comes from? I thought everyone did. Well, not the transfers, but it was a pretty big deal when he went through his initiation. Four doesn't even look up. Like Tris, he doesn't like attention to be focused on him. It must be an Abnegation thing.

"You will not find out your number today," Lauren tells us. "The simulation is set to my fear landscape program, so you will experience my fears instead of your own. For the purposes of this exercise, though, each of you will only face _one_ of my fears, to get a sense for how the simulation works." Lauren begins assigning us fears with no particular rhyme or reason. I will experience her fear of 'walls that inch slowly inward and trap you between them'. My stomach clenches when she points to Tris and assigns her 'kidnapping by men without faces.' I look to Four for help, but he doesn't seem to notice.

I walk to Tris and slide my arm around her waist. She leans into my side. "You okay? Can you handle this fear?" I ask her quietly.

Tris shrugs. "I need to," she says. "It will probably end up in my fear landscape anyway. I'm good at fear sims, I should be okay, right?" I sigh… I feel irrationally guilty for not protecting her from experiencing that. Logically, though, I know that Peter wouldn't have given up until he got to her.

Speaking of Peter… he's still here. So is Molly. How long is it going to take for them to kick him out? The final test is tomorrow. Maybe they're just going to dock him lots of points in initiation and make him factionless then?

We can't see what is actually happening in the simulations, but we can see the initiates reactions. The fear landscape isn't like the fear sims; instead of sitting in a chair, you're in a big room, the fear landscape room, and actually physically going through the motions of whatever you do to get out of the fear. It brings our physical and emotional training together.

I don't pay much attention as the first two initiates take their turns in the fear landscape room, but then it's my turn. I stand in the middle of the fear landscape room and Lauren injects the serum into my neck. A moment later, my surroundings transform around me.

I am in a room with iron walls. It's a pretty small room, or more of a box. Kind of like Four's fear of confinement, except in this sim the walls move toward me, slowly but steadily. I push against them, my hands on one wall and my foot against the other, but it makes no difference, I can't even slow the walls down that way.

I drop to my knees, searching the floor for something to stop them with. It's pretty dark, so I have to go by feel, but I find nothing. The way out of this one must be to just calm down. This isn't one of my own fears, so that won't be too hard.

Standing right at the center of the room, I relax my hands at my sides and close my eyes, focusing on my breathing. In, out. In, out.

It's not long at all before I no longer hear the grinding of the iron walls, and I open my eyes to find myself in the fear landscape room once again. Letting out a sigh, I smile at Lauren. "Very good, Uriah," she says, smiling back. "You were in for less than two minutes." That makes me feel more confident for my final test tomorrow. Now I'm just nervous about how Tris will handle Lauren's fear of kidnapping.

When Tris is up, my stomach is in knots. Tris begins to thrash around, but like she's restrained in some way. My heart rate picks up. When she begins screaming, I can hear my pulse pound in my ears and I feel sick to my stomach. These are the screams of someone who genuinely believes they're about to die, screams of pure terror, and I know, I _know_ that she is not registering that this isn't reality. She's back at that chasm, believing she's about to die, that no one will come to rescue her in time. I rush to Four, and I can see the panic and pain at seeing her like this mirrored in his eyes. He cares about her too, after all.

"Four, get her out!" I yell. Once I am near enough I tell him more quietly, "She got kidnapping. Get her out!" Realization dawns on his face- he didn't notice which fear she had been assigned before.

"Stop!" Four roars, and Lauren, looking startled, types in a command and stops the sim immediately.

I don't know what to do. Should I comfort her? Or would she resent that? I feel like she would resent it. She hates to look weak and she would probably think that made her look weaker. But what Four does next makes me furious.

He stalks over to her, grabs her by one wrist and yanks her upright. "What the hell was that, Stiff?"

"I… I didn't…" she stammers through hiccups, the kind that come after you've been sobbing and can't quite calm down. Every muscle in my body is straining to run to her and pull her into my arms.

"Get yourself together!" Four yells. "That was pathetic."

And then, I'm shocked at what Tris does next. Her face turns red and she slaps Four right across the face, then runs. For a moment I look between the door Tris just left through and Four's stunned face, his dropped jaw, his red cheek. I glare at him for only a second before chasing after her.

* * *

"Do you want to talk about it?"

It took me a few minutes to find Tris- damn, she's fast. She had been out by the train tracks, waiting for a train. I'm not sure where she was planning to go, but it wasn't too difficult to talk her into coming back in with me. I led her straight to the net, where we could be alone and talk and she could calm down.

Tris shrugs. "It turned into that night at the chasm. I thought it was real. I… I lost all sense of logic. I thought I was going to die. They're going to come back for me, aren't they?" Her voice sounds tight. I brush tears off her cheeks with my thumbs.

"They won't, Tris. We can go ask Max for an update later, but the final test is tomorrow. I think they'll all be gone after that, if not before." She clings to me, her arms wrapped around my torso.

When I'm with Tris, we don't have to talk, sometimes. That's a new thing for me; all my friends and family here in Dauntless, I've never had this kind of connection where we're just comfortable with silence for so long. Eventually, she speaks again. "How are you doing with the news about your dad? Do you think you'll get to see him again someday?"

I haven't had much chance to think about the news about my dad being alive. I've been busy with initiation, with this mess with Peter, dealing with Four's crush on my girlfriend, Al's suicide, getting ready to stop a war… there hasn't been room in my head to process the news about my dad. I shrug. "I guess I haven't had time to think much about it."

"We can ask my mom for more information after… after all this is over, I guess," Tris says. "I really hope you get to see him again, Uriah."

"Do you think you'll be okay if kidnapping shows up in your fear landscape tomorrow?" I ask, changing the subject. I feel like thinking about my dad would be like opening a can of worms. Too much will be happening in the next few days for me to get distracted with that right now, so I lock those thoughts and feelings away deep inside me.

"I hope so."

I've been wondering something since I found her at the tracks. "Where were you going to go, today? When I found you waiting for the train?"

Tris looks up. "Erudite. I was going to see Caleb." I nod. That makes sense.

"I'm glad I caught you. You might have gotten in trouble. And you don't want attention drawn to yourself with Jeanine Matthews right now."

Tris nods. "Yeah, thanks," she whispers. "I don't need to see Caleb anyway when I have you." After a moment she turns to kind of rest her forearms on my chest, so she's looking right at me, and she grins. I can't help grinning back. "I want to go get a tattoo," she says.

* * *

"Shauna," I call when I see her across the Pit. I run up to her with Will at my heels. After Tris and I got our new tattoos, I hung out with Will for a while. He was concerned about Christina during the attack. Apparently they're a thing now. I decided that we should include her and I don't really care what Four thinks about it; Christina can be trusted.

"Hey, Uriah, Will," she says when I reach her. "What's up?"

I pull her into a hallway without cameras. "Can you get one more of those anti-serums? The innoculations or whatever?" I ask her quietly.

Shauna's eyes dart around nervously, then back and forth between Will and me. "I can try. Why?"

"Christina," Will says. "I can't just leave her to be… like a zombie, like the rest."

Shauna nods slowly. "I'll try. Bring her to the meeting tonight, okay?" Will nods, and takes a slow breath in and back out as Shauna walks away.

"If Shauna can't get more of that, I'll give Chris mine," Will says.

I shake my head as we begin walking toward the dormitory- I think that's where Tris and Christina will be. "You can't, Will. You're the only one from Erudite. We need you."

He sighs heavily. "Then I don't know. I can't let her go out there."

"We'll figure something out," I assure him.

* * *

By the time we go to the meeting at Four's that night, we have filled Christina in on all the basics. She was pretty mad that we had waited this long to tell her, but eventually said she understood why we were cautious about telling anyone more than we had to.

"I got it," Shauna grins as we walk in. Will attacks her with a hug, thanking her over and over.

Four, on the other hand, looks pissed. "What the hell is Candor doing here?!"

"Will wouldn't help if we didn't include Christina," I say. "We've already filled her in, so there's no changing it now. Shauna got another dose of the antiserum. Deal with it and find some way for her to help."

Four glares at me. He obviously doesn't like me bossing him around, but I really don't care. If I had my way, we'd be including Lynn and Marlene on the plan, too, but I know there's no way we can include anyone else. I hope they'll forgive us for this.

"Fine," he says. "Christina can come go to Abnegation to help capture the traitors." I can see that Will is uncomfortable with her being away from him for this, but I can also see that there will be no arguing with Four about it.

"We'll look out for her, man," I assure him quietly. "She'll be there with Tris and me. And Zeke. We won't let anything happen to her." Will nods.

The meeting otherwise is pretty much just going over the same plan we talked about last time, updating on whether preparations have all been made, that sort of thing. Four is still glaring at me when we leave an hour later.

"Four sure doesn't like to be challenged, does he?" Tris snickers as we walk back to Mom's apartment.

I laugh. "No, seems he doesn't."

"Thank you," she says. "For helping keep my best friend safe."

I let us into the apartment and pull her back to my room. "I want to see the new tattoo," I say as I pull out some shorts and a tank top to sleep in. I toss her one of my shirts, knowing it will fit her like a dress.

"You first," she says. I smile and pull off my shirt, then pull the gauze off my left side. Tris inspects it. "It's the Little Dipper and Big Dipper," she says, looking at me curiously.

I nod. "You asked about my dad right before we went to get the tattoos, remember?" She nods. "Well I was thinking about how he used to take me up on the roof on clear nights to look at the stars. He always said that the Big Dipper watches over the Little Dipper like he watches over me. It's one of the few memories I have of him."

"I love it," Tris says before she goes to show me her new tattoo.

To my surprise, Tris pulls off her shirt right there in front of me, and my breath hitches in my throat. She's so beautiful. Too soon, she turns so her back faces me. I can see that she's a little nervous about letting me see her, but not as nervous as I would have expected, and I hope she won't put that shirt back on too soon.

I peel back the gauze that covers her right shoulder and smile. She got the symbol of Abnegation. "Do you like it?" she asks.

"I do," I say. "You wouldn't be your amazing self if you hadn't grown up there. It will always be a part of you and I love every bit of you." Her left shoulder has the Dauntless flames. She got that one last week. I trace it with my fingers. "Now you have both your future and your past."

Tris turns around and stares into my eyes for a moment. "You're so beautiful, Tris," I whisper before pulling her to me and crashing my lips to hers. Her hands have moved to cover herself up. I shake my head. "Don't hide yourself from me, Tris. You're perfect." She leads me to the bed and I can feel my breathing picking up. I want her… I need her.

"I love you, Uriah," she whispers against my lips before pulling me onto the bed. "I don't know what will happen, if we will survive what's coming. I want to be with you."

I nod slowly before I pull her close and kiss her passionately, and we lose ourselves in each other for the first time.


	27. Chapter 27

**CHAPTER 27**

Tris lets Eric inject her, just like he did me, with what he claims is a tracker. I am sure that Tris has drawn the same conclusion I have: it's the serum that will turn our entire faction into mindless zombies and force them to march on Abnegation, killing everyone they can find.

I pull Tris into a hug the moment she exits the fear landscape room. The only other person in the waiting area is Four; the Dauntless-borns went first then the transfers, each group beginning with the lowest-ranked to the highest, so Tris was the last. "You did it, baby!" I say into her ear as her arms wrap around my back and hug me back tightly. "You were amazing!"

"We both did it," Tris says, grinning at me.

"How many fears did you have?" I ask her. She was in and out so fast- for sure under ten minutes.

"Six," she replies. "How many did you have?"

"Eleven," I reply sheepishly, though I know it was probably the second lowest of all the initiates. Lauren told me, at least, that it was the lowest among the Dauntless born.

Four approaches us cautiously. "Uh, could I talk to Tris for a minute?" he asks, rubbing the back of his neck. I really don't want to walk away from her right now; my third worst fear in my landscape was losing Tris to Four. Some of my fears were pretty silly and embarrassing- like the fear of some old Urban Legend called Bloody Mary, who we once tried to summon in Mom's bathroom as kids. I won't ask about Tris's fears because I'd never want to admit to my own.

"Will you be okay?" I ask her quietly. She nods, and I leave the area, but stop just around the corner and eavesdrop. I know, I know, I'm jealous and need to work on trust. But I really don't trust Four just yet.

"I wanted to talk to you about you and Uriah, Tris," he says, and I tense.

"What about us?" Her voice has a note of tension and she sounds a bit defensive, colder than I'm used to hearing her.

Four sighs. "It's not like that, Tris. Relax." There's a pause before he continues. "Look, Uriah is like a little brother to me. I haven't felt about other girls the way I do for you, but I understand that your feelings are for him, not for me. I just wanted to tell you that I care about you and hope we can stay friends, and that I promise you, I am letting go of my feelings for you and just want you to be happy. I can see that he does make you happy." I can hear the smile in his voice as he adds, "but if he ever hurts you, tell me so I can kick his pansycake ass." Did he just call me a pansycake?! He'd better watch out the next time we play Dauntless or Candor…

"I'd like to be your friend, too, Tobias," Tris says quietly. "Thank you."

I don't feel like I need to listen any more, so I wait restlessly and that's when I notice a crate on the floor filled with the serums that Eric is injecting into everyone. Glancing around, I see no one is watching; I don't even see any cameras that could be spying on me. I grin at my own idea as I quickly grab a handful of serums and a couple of syringes, stuffing them into the pocket of my leather jacket- just in case.

A moment later she comes around the corner and I wrap an arm around her waist before leading her to Mom's apartment. We both know that tonight is when the shit will hit the fan, so we nap in each other's arms until it's time for the initiation banquet.

* * *

The initiation banquet is held in the dining hall. Initiation Day is basically Dauntless's biggest holiday; pretty much everyone in the faction shows up for the rankings, and usually nearly everyone is completely wasted by the time they are posted. Today is no exception.

Tris sits next to me at a table with the usual crew. Zeke is on my other side next to Shauna then Four, and across the table from us sit Marlene, Lynn, Will and Christina. "I'm so nervous Tris says, ringing her hands. "What if I don't make it? What if I'm cut?"

Four laughs out loud. "There is no way you could possibly get cut, Tris," he says. "You were already in first, and you had by far the fastest fear landscape time. Six minutes faster than Uri, and he was the second fastest."

"I won't be able to relax until I see for myself," she insists. I shake my head. Tris and her insecurities… I just don't get it.

Christina rolls her eyes. "Tris, please. Stop it. If you have something to worry about then the rest of us are screwed." Tris laughs. Just then we hear a loud squeal and I look up to see Eric standing on a table, holding a microphone. He taps it with his fingers until the Dauntless gradually quiet down to give their leader respect and attention.

"We aren't big on speeches here," he says. "Eloquence is for the Erudite." I can't help scoffing as the crowd laughs. Apparently most of them are less observant than I am and don't remember Eric's faction of birth.

Eric continues. "So I'm going to keep this short. It's a new year and we have a new pack of initiates. And a slightly smaller pack of new members. We offer them our congratulations." Dauntless all around us pound on tables and stomp feet, and a grin creeps onto my face at the excitement and energy in the room.

"We believe in bravery. We believe in taking action. We believe in freedom from fear and in acquiring the skills to force the bad out of the world so the good can prosper and thrive." Oh, so that's why you're going to force us to commit genocide tonight, is it? "If you also believe in those things, we welcome you." Tris and I grin at each other. Eric can't possibly believe his own speech, but I do, and I know that Tris does, too.

"Tomorrow, in their first act as members, our top ten initiates will choose their professions, in the order they were ranked." I wish that were true. Unfortunately, I know what we will really be doing tomorrow. "The rankings, I know, are what everyone is really waiting for. They are determined by a combination of three scores- the first, from the combat stage of training; the second, from the simulation stage; and the third, from the final examination, the fear landscape. The rankings will appear on the screen behind me."

Precisely as he finishes his speech, the screen lights up, and shown on it is a list in numbered order of all the initiates names and pictures. I start at the top and skim downward, first rejoicing at Tris and my names at the top, then scanning the rest of the list.

1\. Tris  
2\. Uriah  
3\. Lynn  
4\. Marlene  
5\. Will  
6\. Christina  
7\. Luke  
8\. Aiden  
9\. Kate  
10\. Gabe

11\. Sarah  
12\. Aaron  
13\. Peter  
14\. Molly

Tris and I jump up and down in each other's arms, then I pull her into a long, passionate kiss. I pull away when the crowd quiets and my ears begin to focus on Peter's temper tantrum.

"How could I have possibly ranked at almost the bottom?!" he screams at Eric. "That's not right!"

Max is the one who stalks up to him. "You lost a lot of points for your cowardly behavior, Peter," he says in an even tone. "Trying to rape and murder the first ranked initiate, three against one, showed us just how cowardly you and Molly are. You will have your things packed and leave Dauntless by noon tomorrow."

I smirk at Peter as he glares at Tris and me. Bastard. At least when everything gets sorted out after this war, he won't be allowed here and we won't have to deal with him any longer.

"Baby bro!" Zeke shouts. "And Trissy! You both rocked it!" Zeke chatters at me excitedly for a few minutes before Shauna pulls him away, reminding him to 'let the poor kids breathe.'

Four comes up to us next, and puts one arm around Tris and the other around my shoulders. "Congratulations, Tris, Uri," he says with a grin. "Maybe you'll be Dauntless's new power couple. Number one and number two in initiation, good job!" Then he leans closer to me and says quietly, so no one else can here, "meet at my place tonight. Ten-thirty." With that, he releases us and exits the dining hall with Zeke and Shauna.

It's dinner time by now, and we stuff ourselves with the delicious foods laid out at the banquet, from pizza to hamburgers to turkey and potatoes, and of course I have several slices of Dauntless cake. The after party is going strong in the Pit, which has been transformed into basically a dance club, and Tris and I dance and drink- not too much drinking, though, as we definitely don't need to be wasted or hung over for what's about to go down hours from now- until it's time to meet at Four's. We get Christina and Will's attention and discretely slink away from the party and to Four's apartment.

* * *

"The injections we were all given today are not trackers, they're the simulation serum that will force Dauntless to attack Abnegation and we can only assume that this will happen sometime tonight or tomorrow," Four explains, as if we hadn't figured that out yet.

There's really nothing new, once again, at this meeting- just once again going over the same plans we did a few days ago. Four tells us that he contacted Tris's parents earlier in the day so they could evacuate children to safe houses. Zeke injects all the non-divergents with the antiserum that Shauna stole from the loading dock, and we disperse into Four's and Zeke's apartments to spend the night and wait for the simulation to begin. Tris, Shauna, Christina and I all stay at Zeke's place, taking turns of a couple of hours each listening for signs that the simulation has begun.

Zeke takes the first shift, and around two in the morning, wakes me to take the second. However, instead of laying down and going to sleep, he sits up with me for a while.

"How are you feeling about this, Uri?" he asks softly.

I shrug. How does he think I feel? "It's scary as hell, man. Be careful out there," I tell him. After a moment I say, my voice just a whisper, "I'm afraid of losing Tris. She's so selfless. She wasn't raised to have much sense of self-preservation."

Zeke nods slowly. "I'll help you watch out for her, bro. We're not losing anyone, got it?"

I nod, but I have this nagging feeling that we aren't all making it out of this alive.

An hour and twenty minutes later, at a quarter of four in the morning, I'm getting ready to wake Shauna to take a shift when I hear something. I take the drinking glass I had placed on a shelf near the door, holding it up to the door to amplify the sounds from outside. My stomach drops.

I hear the perfectly rhythmic, robotic sound of marching.

The simulation has begun.


	28. Chapter 28

**CHAPTER 28**

I scramble to wake everyone up, and we all quickly pull on our boots, relieved that the antiserum worked: Shauna, Christina and Zeke are all fully aware. Christina, Tris and I exit Zeke's apartment first; Zeke and Shauna will follow in a moment. We focus on matching the movements and rhythm of the soldiers around us, our faces blank. All around us, Dauntless stare straight ahead, faces completely blank and emotionless, marching in perfect rhythm. Inside, I am in a full on panic, but I can't let any of that show on my face. I would give myself away and likely end up dead before I could do anything to stop this horror.

I can't see Christina or Tris, but I can feel Tris's presence directly behind me and I assume that Christina follows her. We march down hallway after hallway, passing the entrance to the pit, until we reach a large cavern that even I am unfamiliar with. I continue to follow the movements of the robot in front of me, watching out of the corner of my eye when we reach tables full of belts, holsters and guns. I have neurosim darts in my pocket, and I hope that I'll be able to load the gun with those, but who knows whether I will have the chance. Above all, we have to blend in.

The line stops just before we reach the tables and Eric walks by, inspecting each zombie Dauntless quickly, presumably looking for signs of awareness. He passes right over me, but stops at Tris. "The _Stiff,_ " he sneers. I can't see what he's doing, but she must pass the test; I hear him utter a "humph" and move on. Soon the line again begins to move forward.

I keep my movements as close to those of the person ahead of me as I can, noticing that Tris fumbles slightly as she arms herself. I hold my breath, praying that no one saw and thankfully, nothing happens.

My eyes are trained on the tattoo on the neck of the boy ahead of me as we march up stairs and through hallways, ending at the train track. There will be no jumping aboard a moving train this time. No, the trains are stopped, waiting. Soldier after soldier pulls the next in with a hand, and I do the same for Tris behind me once I climb in. I see that her face is as blank as my own. We end up near the back of a tightly packed car filled with brain dead soldiers and when the train begins moving, Tris's hand clasps my own. I dart my eyes to my left and see that she has grabbed hold of Christina's hand too. Several rows ahead of us, I spot Zeke and Shauna.

I squeeze Tris's hand, still keeping my face blank, and rub my finger back and forth on her palm as I have so many times until the train stops. We climb out one by one, in the opposite order we entered; Christina now leads our trio, followed by Tris then me. "It's okay, Tris," I whisper when I am sure that none of the traitors that are aware and leading this massacre are nearby. "It will be okay." I don't know that. I don't know that it will be okay. I don't know that Will and Four made it out. I don't know for sure that the intelligence we've received is correct. Honestly, I don't know that we will survive the day. But maybe it's just the reminder that I'm there, that I am right behind her, looking out for her, that evens out her breathing, and if it calms her enough to blend in, then it was right that I said it, even if it isn't true.

Abnegation looks the same as it did when I came here with Tris and the others to meet with Mr. and Mrs. Prior, except for the streets filled with black-clothed, armed soldiers. It's quiet, other than the rhythmic marching… until the popping sounds of gunshots begin. Tris, Christina and I all keep marching, and ahead I see a gray-clothed man on his knees, hands in the air, and I recognize Tori behind him, just before she puts a bullet in the man's head. Her expression remains blank; she doesn't react at all. He slumps over lifelessly and I force myself not to look at the gaping red hole in his skull.

Soldiers ahead of us begin to go in different directions, flawlessly carrying out orders that I can't hear anyone give. Soon we will have to pretend that we are receiving these orders, too. If we aren't convincing, we will die. I remember what Zeke told me once when we were setting up a prank. He said no matter what, act confident, like you're supposed to be there. If you don't act nervous, no one will question you. I can only hope that the same advice is successful now.

Tris and Christina seem to have the same idea. Christina leads us, rhythmically marching, down an alleyway before we reach the officers I see stationed a hundred yards ahead of us. Specifically, I see Eric.

We continue the rhythmic marching even once we are out of sight and eventually I release a breath I had been holding since we turned into the alleyway. Eric doesn't seem to have followed us. I don't hear anyone behind us. We stop, keeping our vacant demeanors, but I hear Tris whisper. "My parents will be in the safe house at North and Fairfield. Jeanine is probably looking for the file at Abnegation headquarters."

"Find your parents first?" Christina whispers. Tris nods, just barely, and begins marching around Christina, who eventually falls in line behind me. We follow Tris, eyes darting to look for anyone who could notice that we are not following unspoken orders, but I see no one. Tris seems to know just how to weave through alleys and between houses to get us to our destination unseen.

I think we have been in Abnegation for about an hour when we reach the safe house. Natalie had told us to knock twice, then three times, then six times, and that's what Tris does. The door opens and I recognize the man that stands there, because I have seen him before a few times. I know who he is not just because he is the head of the council, not just because he handed me the knife at my Choosing Ceremony. Most recently, I have seen him in Four's fear landscape.

As soon as we are in the basement of the safe house and the door has been shut and locked behind us, I shoot him a glare quickly and whisper to Tris, "all these Abnegation dying, and Marcus Eaton couldn't be one of them? He's the only one I know deserves it."

"Mom! Dad!" I hear Tris cry out, and smile as she wraps her arms around her parents. Tears run down her father's face.

"Well," Christina says, "we made it. Aren't Zeke and Shauna supposed to meet us here?"

I nod, biting my lip nervously. "We can't go looking for them, as much as I want to. And believe me, I'd feel a whole lot better if my brother was here. But we had Tris to guide us and they didn't." I check my watch. We've been here longer than I thought- it has been nearly an hour and a half, and that doesn't include the time it took to get onto the trains. "Shouldn't Will and Four have ended the simulation by now?" I ask nervously.

Tris worries her lip, and I take her hand. "What if we got some bad info?" she asks. "Maybe we should have left someone at Dauntless. Thinking about it logically… if something went wrong, I don't think Jeanine Matthews would want it coming back to her. I think maybe she would run the simulation from Dauntless."

"That's possible," Mr. Prior says nervously. Leave it to Tris to think like an Erudite. "But we don't know for sure."

"I say Tris and I go back. Chris, you wait here for Zeke and Shauna. I think I can stop the sim if we can get to it. Is anyone else good with computers? Zeke is… but I don't know where he ended up."

Tris's father raises his hand. "I was raised in Erudite. I know quite a bit."

"And I was Dauntless. I can help defend everyone," Mrs. Prior offers.

Tris shakes her head furiously, her eyes teary with fear. "It's too dangerous. I don't want to lose either of you!"

I pull her against me, stroking her back, and whisper in her ear. "Tris, they aren't really safe here, either. If they can help, let them." She nods slowly and agrees.

Then, the devil himself speaks up, first clearing his throat. "Has anyone seen my son, Tobias?" Marcus asks, his kind Abnegation leader mask covering his face. "I want to be sure that he is okay."

Tris scoffs and I glare. Christina looks at us curiously, confused. "He doesn't want to see _you_ ," I spit at Marcus. "He went to Erudite to try and stop the simulation. I would guess that if we're right and it's being run from Dauntless, he'll end up back there eventually, too. Unless he's caught or killed." I see the realization hit Christina, then her eyes widen as she connects the dots- she knows Four's secret, now.

"I'm coming with you," Marcus says firmly. I roll my eyes and Tris huffs.

"Fine," Tris says. "Whoever is coming, let's go. We need to get to the trains."

* * *

I dart behind Tris, her parents and Marcus, being the only one who does not know the way. I am the last to come around a corner and I can tell we are near the train tracks now, I recognize this area. Unfortunately, as we get nearer the tracks, we also see more officers ready to shoot us.

"This way!" Marcus hisses, turning to run back the way we came. I see what he's doing- he's heading for the factionless sector, so we can get to the train through there. It seems like a great idea… until, one at a time, Tris, then Andrew, then Marcus run across a strip of grass a few dozen yards wide and into an alleyway…. And just as Natalie begins to follow, I hear the pounding of boots. It isn't the rhythmic marching of zombified soldiers. This is someone who is aware.

There is a yell, and Natalie stops, hands in the air. "Max, please! You don't have to do this!" she cries. I circle around the building I am next to, praying there will be no others behind him.

"I'm sorry, Natalie," Max says. His head is in my scope, and I curse under my breath when I realize that I never switched the bullets out for neurosim darts. "You know I don't have any choice now. I'm too deep in this."

Just before he's about to pull the trigger, I shift my aim to Max's right shoulder and fire. "Run, Natalie!" I yell as Max falls to the ground in pain.

Max regains control of his arms and shakily aims at me as I approach. "Uriah!" I hear Tris yell tearfully, then Max lets out another cry and drops the gun again, and blood begins to drip from his upper arm.

I reach Max and shake my head at him. "We believe," I say, quoting the Dauntless Manifesto as I look down at him sadly, "in shouting for those who can only whisper, in defending those who cannot defend themselves. We do not believe that we should be allowed to stand idly by." I shake my head as Max cowers below. "You, Max, are a traitor and a coward." And with that, I hit him in the head with the butt of my gun- just hard enough to knock him out, but not to kill him.

And then I run.


	29. Chapter 29

**CHAPTER 29**

Landing in the net is not nearly as exciting when you are trying to stop a war rather than beginning initiation.

I was the last one down, in case anyone needed a bit of a push; Tris had been first, followed by her mother. Andrew followed Natalie, and then it was just Marcus and me.

Marcus glances off the ledge nervously, then back to me as I glare at him. "You don't seem to like me much, though I'm not sure why. How do I know this isn't a trick?"

I scoff. "I just sent my girlfriend and her parents off that ledge. How would I trick you?" How stupid is this jerk? "And you're right, I don't like you. I've been in your son's fear landscape. I know who you _really_ are. We need to get down there and help Tris in case she has to fight. So you can either jump or I can push you, but I can't guarantee that it'll be off this ledge if I do. The one on the other side of the roof, without a net at the bottom? That's seeming very tempting right now." I hate him. He deserves to fall and die. I could never really do that, but I don't mind making him think I would.

Marcus gulps, then he finally jumps.

When I arrive at the bottom, the others are pressed against the wall in the shadows in case any traitors or brain dead soldiers patrol this area. Tris looks relieved when she sees me, though she glares at Marcus.

"Will you tell me where the file is now, Natalie?" Marcus hisses quietly. "It is imperative that we retrieve it."

Natalie rolls her eyes slightly. Marcus doesn't seem to notice. "I gave it to Tobias when he visited with Tris and Uriah. If Jeanine can't find it, she can't destroy it, and if _you_ don't have it, you can't release it." I see a rage that reminds me of Four's fear landscape flash across Marcus's face, but he hides it quickly. I make eye contact with Tris and we silently agree not to say anything about where we hid the flash drive- or that we ever touched it at all.

We are nearing the Pit, stopping frequently to listen for noises to indicate we have any sort of company. It is when we are almost there that I hear something. "Shhh!" I hiss. "Listen!" Natalie quickly locates an alcove for us to hide in, and I stay near the opening, peering out to watch for our opposition.

The voices I hear whispering after a moment are familiar, even though I can't make out what they're saying. I stick my hand out to wave- I don't want to get shot in the head if they don't realize I'm a friend at first. "Guys!" I whisper-yell. "Over here!" I hear clicks from them readying their weapons, then Four's voice quietly calling out. "Uriah? That you?"

"Yes!" I whisper, loudly again, waiting a moment before I step into his view.

"The sim is being run from here, not Erudite," Will tells me, and I nod. I can see in Four's eyes as he glances at Tris and her parents that there is something else that they aren't saying, but I can also tell that now is not the time.

We all meet in the hallway and continue creeping toward the Pit. Suddenly there is an abrupt commotion behind me, and when I turn my heart pounds. Marcus has managed to surprise and disarm Four and Natalie both, and the three of them stand twenty feet away from us. Both have their hands in the air, and Marcus points a gun at each of their heads. I can see Four's mind searching for the way out, but Marcus is pretty stupid. Four doesn't need to get himself out of this, not with the rest of us right here.

I'm not sure why I let Max live but don't consider doing the same for Marcus, but I don't even think about it, this time. I don't think about anything at all, really. Before I even know what I am doing, my gun is aimed at Marcus's head and my finger pulls the trigger. Everyone cringes at the loud pop that gives away our presence, but the world is rid of one more monster. Four is practically like a brother to me and he's safe, he's alive, and that bastard who called himself Four's 'father' can never hurt him again, now. Whatever comes our way now… we will find a way through it.

Four and Will take the lead heading into the Pit. We have barely stepped foot through the door when we hear marching. It is too rhythmic to be one of the traitors who were excluded from the simulation; these are the 'zombie'-like soldiers who don't know what they are doing.

Four shoots the first one to come into view. He doesn't shoot to kill; he shoots her in the right arm. We all gasp when she doesn't even react, doesn't slow down. Will shoots her leg, and she just keeps coming. "They won't stop," Four says desperately, shaking his head. "We have to kill them. We don't have a choice."

They were marching in a single file line, but have now spread out and are aiming their weapons our way, and bullets begin to fly toward us. One narrowly misses my head and I frantically push Tris behind me. "Uriah, I can take care of myself, let me help!" she calls out, stepping around me. A moment later, another soldier is down; I didn't even see the first two fall. Only one left. I recognize her. It's Kate, who I once hooked up with, who kissed me during that game of Dare. I push that out of my mind as much as I can and pull the trigger. The bullet speeds through her forehead and she crumples in a heap alongside the other three soldiers as I gasp in grief. Kate and I weren't that close, no, but we grew up together and I just shot her in the head. I shot her, and I had to. It was her or me, her or any of us, but she didn't even know what she was doing.

Tris pulls me into her arms. "You had to, Uriah," she murmurs. "It's not fair, and it wasn't her fault, but you had no choice. I know this is hard but now, we have to move." I bury my nose in her hair and nod. "Count to three in your head. Three seconds and then you have to be brave, okay?" I nod against her head again. One… I remember Kate's flirtatious smile Two… I see her aiming her gun at me. Three… I replay her crumpling to the floor.

I take a deep breath. "Okay," I say, "let's go."

Tris and I sprint after her parents, Will and Four across the Pit. "We need to get to the control room," Four calls. "Follow me!" I know where it is, but some of the others don't.

I'm the second one up the ladder to the Pire. Tris follows me, then Will, Tris's parents bringing up the rear. Tris's feet have just touched the floor at the top of the ladder and Four and I are near the elevator when Peter comes around the corner, gun aimed right at me, a wicked grin on his face.

"Peter," Tris gasps. He was supposed to be gone… today. Of course. Of course, Max was using him for their side. Of course someone like Peter would help with this.

"Say goodbye, Stiff-lover," Peter sneers. As I hear Tris's blood-curdling scream and hear two loud _bangs_ in quick succession, I see him pulls the trigger.

I fall, but the pain I expect from a gunshot wound doesn't come. Did he miss? Tris is still screaming, louder, longer. There's a weight on top of me and I push it off. Immediately, my eyes widen in horror as I scramble back, my hands slick with blood.

It's not my blood. I almost wish it was.

Tris and Will have scrambled to Four's side. Blood pools around him, and Will is pressing down on Four's chest with a look of terror. The pieces quickly come together.

Four jumped in front of the bullet. He saved my life. And Peter lies lifelessly a half dozen yards away. That second bang must have been Tris's bullet, and it must be what took out Peter.

My face is wet, and after a moment I realize why: tears. I crawl to Four- my brother's best friend, the bravest man I know, the man who loves me almost as if I were his own brother. Who loves my girlfriend, my mom, my brother, and I _know_ deep inside of me that he did it for them even more than he did it for me.

"Tobias!" Tris wails. "Stay awake! Stay with me! We- we'll get you help- we'll find someone-" her body wracks in sobs.

"No you won't," he wheezes, and blood spills from his lips.

No. We won't. It's too late. It was too late within moments of that bullet hitting Four's chest.

"Four." I don't even recognize my own voice. It's tight, shaky, almost sounds like I am gasping. "Four, I love you, brother."

Tris leans down and presses her lips to his forehead and even though I know how much pain he must be in, he looks peaceful and content as he closes his eyes. "Make it count," he whispers and a moment later, the hand Tris is holding loses its grip on hers, and she screams again. I pull her into my arms.

"Tris," I sob, "we can't… we have to… we have to finish this, Tris." She nods, and I nod back at her. I turn to Natalie. "Natalie, you and Tris stay here and help hold off anyone that comes. Will, Andrew and I will go to the control room."

This is it. If too many soldiers come, either down here or up there- really, who knows what could be waiting for us in the control room- we may not make it. One or both of us may join Four. I pull Tris to me again and crash my lips against hers. She kisses back desperately, passionately, and when we pull away, we both whisper 'I love you' again and again until Will pulls me away from her. "I'll see you soon," I call to her, wishing I really believed it.


	30. Chapter 30

_A/N: Hey all! I know that Four's death in the last chapter was super sad and upsetting- believe me, I cried while I wrote it. You can blame my friend, K. She convinced me that I had already RUINED HIS LIFE by making Tris fall for Uriah, so the kindest thing to do to Four was to kill him off. It's all her fault. I'm an easily influenced person, what can I say? Besides… I kind of agree with her. I was curious what would happen if Tris and Uri got together so I wrote about it but I didn't know what to do with Four, so, there you go. Forgive me please! The story is almost done- there should be just one more chapter after this one. Thanks for sticking with me!_

* * *

 **CHAPTER 30**

I hang back for a moment, worried about Tris. Leaving Tris there is giving me flashbacks to seeing her about to fall to her death at the Chasm. I want to stay and protect her. I can't lose her. But she has her mother, she will be okay. Natalie shoos me away to follow Will and Andrew. And she's right- they may need me. I ranked five spots higher than Will for a reason, and Andrew has no combat experience whatsoever. Thank God Natalie and Tris both do.

As soon as the elevator returns to the ground floor of the Pire, I get on and press the button for the seventh floor, where the control room is. That there are no dead bodies or pools of blood in this elevator, I will take as a good sign, but I also get my gun ready in case I have company waiting for me when the doors open.

The red digital screen above the door reads the floor numbers as we pass them. _Two… three…_ please let that hallway be clear. _Four… five…_ I should have gone with them. What if they're both dead? Can I stop this on my own? _Six…_ I press myself against the wall right next to the door, where the buttons are for the different floors, making myself as small as possible, my gun at the ready.

 _Seven._ The elevator dings softly as the doors slide open and for just a second I wait and listen. No sounds outside the door, and I don't see anyone's reflection in the mirrored wall opposite me. I cautiously stick my head and gun out the door at the same time, looking left, then right. There are two dead soldiers bled out on the floor to the right. The control room is to the left.

On feather-light feet, I tiptoe down the hall, back almost pressed against the wall. At the small hallway to the control room door, I stop and come around the corner cautiously, gun aimed at the open doorway, inching my way there on my tip-toes. My breath hitches slightly as I begin to see pieces of the scene in the room.

Will lays limp on the floor, a large, angry bruise forming at his temple. I'm sure he has a concussion, but his chest does rise and fall. I couldn't be more relieved to see signs of life from him.

As I inch closer, I freeze. Andrew cowers with his back against one of the desks. As I had noted a few minutes ago… the man has absolutely _no_ experience with any sort of combat. Obviously, that's why Will was taken out first. But Andrew isn't what shocked me. No, not at all. Because as I silently move closer to the doorway, I see Eric, his gun trained on someone I never expected to see here.

Eric is aiming his rifle at my father, who stands with his hands in the air. Eric has a second gun in his other hand, lazily aiming in Andrew's general direction, and it must have been my dad's. "If Prior makes one move for that computer," Eric says, "I will shoot you, then I'll kill him, too. You don't want to die before your family has a chance to see you again, do you?"

My father's internal conflict is written all over his face. If he tries to overtake Eric, he _might_ succeed. He _might_ be able to save thousands of people. But more likely, he will die. We will lose him all over again, and no good will even come from it. The Abnegation will still all die.

The good thing in this situation is, though… Eric hasn't noticed me coming down this hallway. He's too busy watching Tris's and my fathers. I aim very carefully. I have to get this right. If I miss, he'll just shoot my dad, and probably Tris's too. And then he'll kill me.

I've killed twice today already. I won't give Eric a chance to live, like I did Max. I can't take the risk. Not this time. We are so close to finishing this. I make sure that the bullet will hit where I want it to and I pull the trigger.

Eric's head snaps to the side and he crumples to the floor. Andrew and my father are sprayed with my fearless leader's warm, sticky blood.

I take ten tentative steps forward, down the hall and just barely into the room. My throat tightens and the tears that had barely dried from watching Four die minutes ago threaten to start again. "Dad?" I choke out.

"Uriah," he whispers, crossing the room and wrapping his arms around me; mine lay stiffly at my sides. He grips me so tightly, I can barely breathe. My tears don't come- I almost feel numb now- but I hear a stifled sob escape his chest. "I'm so sorry I left you. I never wanted to leave you."

Finally my arms wrap around his back and I squeeze back. I don't even know that I have begun to cry, too, until I feel something warm and wet slide down my cheeks. I can't believe he's really here. My dad… he's here. He's home. And then suddenly, all I can think is that we have to finish this, that Zeke has to get the hell out of Abnegation before it's too late. He has to see Dad, too.

I pull away and see Andrew still just leaning against the desk, frozen. "Andrew!" I bark. "Help me stop this simulation!" I nearly fly into the chair at the center console, staring at the lines of code for a moment trying to register what they all mean, and somehow, everything Zeke ever taught me seems to flow straight from my brain to my fingertips. I type frantically, hardly even knowing what I am doing. But it's not working.

"Ugh!" I groan. "What am I missing?!" Andrew's eyes light up and he leans over me, pushing my hands off the keyboard. As soon as I see the final command he types I feel dumb- of course that was it. As I've always said… there's a reason I'm not Erudite. But Andrew was.

All the while I have been glancing at the screens every few seconds. More than half of them are set to show the chaos and destruction occurring in our governing faction. Gray-clad bodies litter the streets and Dauntless march robotically, mindlessly, dragging people out of their homes and shooting them execution-style.

That is, until that last command is input by Andrew.

It is then that everything changes.

* * *

The elevator opens back at ground level and I dart out as fast as my legs will carry me, panting, desperate to make sure that Tris is okay. Last I saw her on the monitors, a crowd of Dauntless had been converging on her, but I didn't wait to see what happened there after the simulation stopped.

The Dauntless that had surrounded Tris and Natalie before were looking around confused, yelling, trying to understand what had happened to them. I spot Tris leaning against a wall, her eyes red, her body slumped with exhaustion. I grab her arm and pull her against me, wrapping my arms around her and holding on like I will never let her go. I think I have cried more today than I had since right after my dad 'died', but here I am crying again. "Thank God you're safe," I sob into her hair, and she wraps her arms around my neck, pulling me down to meet her. Her lips crash into mine and her relief at seeing me is obvious and almost tangible. Just as before I got on that elevator, we are whispering choked out declarations of love as her mother smiles at us softly. Natalie is ever the selfless one, waiting for us to have our moment before asking what she desperately needs to know- whether her husband is okay.

I don't give her the chance.

I pull away from Tris and look Natalie in the eye. "He's safe," I tell her. "He made it. He's the hero of the day, Natalie, he stopped that sim." Relief floods her face just as the elevator doors open again, and she runs to her husband, pulling him into her arms. The scene is similar to what she just witnessed between Tris and me a minute ago.

Behind Andrew, Dad carries Will out. I find a drinking fountain a few yards away and fill my hands with water, rushing to Will as it begins to drip between my fingers, and throw the water in his face then shaking him. "Will!" I call. "Will, wake up! We gotta get out of here!" Slowly, Will sputters and looks around confused. Dad presses a square piece of plastic and metal into my hand and I look at it: the hard drive to the computer. Our proof of what just happened and how.

"We've got to get to Candor," Tris calls out, already moving toward the tracks. "The others will meet us there."

* * *

As happy as I am to be with my father, the mood is bleak as we ride to Candor. Andrew and Natalie hold each other and sob as Tris leans into me, staring off into space. Will has just told us what went down in Erudite.

He and Four had arrived and pretty quickly found the room they expected the simulation to be controlled from. When someone stormed in, Four had hidden in a closet just in time, leaving the door open a crack. Will, however, had not managed to.

The person who stormed into the room was Caleb Prior, and it was quickly revealed that he was on Jeanine's side. He was a part of this plan- a part of a plan to massacre his faction of birth, including his own parents.

Will had stupidly set down his gun so that he could look at the computers, and Caleb grabbed it before Will was able to. It was Will's sister, Cara, who came into the room and distracted Caleb… and it was Four who dove out of the closet and put a bullet in Caleb's skull.

That was what they had been holding back when we met up with them in the hallway at Dauntless. Seeing the remainder of the Prior family's state right now, it was a good thing that they didn't say anything right away.

"My brother is dead," Tris whispers. "He- he was a traitor."

I brush a strand of hair out of her face with my fingers, tucking it behind her ear, and press my lips to her forehead. "I know," I say simply, my voice breaking. I can't stand seeing her in this pain. First Four… now Caleb. "But you still have your parents, and we have each other. I know that doesn't make it right… but we can't help that. All you can do is put one foot in front of the other. You helped save thousands of people, Tris. You did a really good thing. Hang onto that."

Tris sighs and closes her eyes, and I hold her against me as I watch the city pass by out the open train door as we approach Candor.


	31. Chapter 31

_This is it! My first completed story! Thanks for sticking with the story, even when I wasn't updating super regularly, and I hope you enjoyed it._

 **CHAPTER 31**

When we arrive in Candor, none of the other Dauntless are here yet. I'm sure things are very chaotic in Abnegation, as they had to capture Max, Jeanine and anyone else who was clearly cooperating with them before meeting us here. Still, I'm disappointed, because I just cannot wait for Zeke and Mom to get here and see Dad.

I entrust Tris with the hard drive, and she goes with her parents to find Jack Kang, leader of Candor. As Candor is the faction of truthfulness, they are the city's judicial system, basically, while Dauntless acts as the law enforcement and military presence. I assume that the hard drive will be locked up somewhere safe and that Jack Kang should come back to the lobby of the Merciless Mart, Candor's headquarters, to process the traitors as they are brought in.

Will paces restlessly in front of the doors, anxiously waiting for Christina. We don't have communication with her, Zeke and Shauna, so we don't actually know whether they all made it through safely; I'm at least as anxious waiting for Zeke and Mom- who I can only assume was fighting under the simulation- as well as the friends that we were not able to include on our coup, mainly Lynn and Marlene.

"I missed you and your brother and mother every day, Uriah," Dad says out of the blue. "It wasn't safe for me here, you understand why. They didn't give me the option to bring you all along."

"Who are 'they'?" I ask, and I'm a little startled by the bitterness in my tone. I guess I didn't realize that I was angry at him for leaving us. Still, I'm more glad to have him back than I am angry. I know I'll have to work through that eventually, but I think we have all the time in the world for that now. It doesn't have to be today.

Dad sighs and gazes off into the distance. "Maybe I will tell you more about it someday. But I was at a place outside the fence. They... had access to all the security cameras around the city. I still watched you, every day. Your mom sure did a good job with you boys. I'm proud of you… and Zeke as well. Every day I hoped for a chance to come back."

"Well, we certainly missed you," I offer. I really don't know what to say. I haven't seen my father in over a decade, believed he was dead until just a couple weeks ago… finally I have the chance to talk to him and of course, now I can't think of a thing to say. "Will you be able to stay?" I finally ask.

"I think so. I have some details to work out but I'm going to make it happen somehow," he says softly just as I begin to see small groups of black clothed figures in the distance, walking toward us.

I grin. "Will! You ready for this? I see Dauntless coming!" Will jumps up from where he had finally settled sitting on the floor with his back to the wall and his head resting on his knees, and he sprints to the doors. We follow him out, the three of us heading to meet the group halfway and help get things settled with any prisoners they might (hopefully, anyway) be escorting.

When we reach the approaching Dauntless a few blocks away, my body goes weak for a moment with relief that Mom, Zeke, Shauna and Christina are among the first small crowd. "Lynn? Mar?" I call out to them.

"They're fine! A little further back!" Shauna calls back as she jerks her thumb pointing behind her. I think I could collapse here right now as all this stress is leaving my body.

When we reach them, I take Zeke's place helping Shauna to escort Max to Candor Headquarters so that Dad can have his emotional, teary reunion with Zeke and, especially, Mom. Mom never moved on after Dad 'died', in all these years. I know it was because she still missed him, and I smile thinking about how good it must feel for her to have the love of her life back.

"Did you get Jeanine?" I ask Shauna when we're less than two blocks from the Merciless Mart.

Shauna grins and nods. "Yes, as well as the other leaders, except Eric. We never found him. Max says he went back to Dauntless, so a team went to check for him."

"You'll find him," I say. "I shot him in the head to save my dad, and Tris's dad too." I sigh. "It didn't all go so well there… but we should wait for Zeke before I tell you." The look on her face… her jaw dropped, tears pooling in her wide hazel eyes… she knows something really bad happened there. Four was one of her best friends. I don't think she's sure that it's him, but she must know that it's likely, or he would be here with me, helping bring the traitors in.

Over an hour passes before we get the chance to tell my brother and friends what happened at the Dauntless compound. Tris' and my parents, Lynn, Shauna, Marlene, Zeke, Christina, Will, Tris and I sit together in the Candor dining hall around a large round table, and Tris presses into my side, staring down at her lap, as I take a deep breath. Zeke sits on my other side, and I put my hand on his shoulder. It's so hard to get these words out, even though I know they all pretty much know what's coming. We can all see who is missing at this table.

"We lost two people at the Dauntless compound," I say in a tight voice. "Marcus Eaton… and Four." Tris is weeping into her hands and I pull her tighter against me. A sob escapes Shauna as silent tears roll down Mom and Zeke's faces. Four had become a part of our family over the past two years, and we all really loved him.

Over the next hour, Will, Tris, my dad and I take turns telling what happened at Erudite and Dauntless, and Zeke and Shauna fill us in on the going-ons in Abnegation, though remarkably, that went much more smoothly than stopping the simulation did. Zeke, Shauna and Christina managed to stay near the most important leaders and quickly organize loyal Dauntless to arrest the traitors responsible for the deaths of hundreds of Abnegation. It will probably take a few days to get a final death count.

* * *

A month has passed since the attack on Abnegation. The factions are still intact, and there has been no conflict other than a small uprising from the Factionless. Dauntless was left enough intact that we had plenty of presence to squash that, and the leader of the Factionless- Four's mother, Evelyn- was captured, tried and sent outside the fence. There is talk, though, of making some changes to at least make life more fair for factionless children.

Max, Jeanine, and a handful of other Dauntless, as well as many Erudite, have been tried under truth serum and executed. I'm still sure not interested in advertising that I'm divergent, but in theory, it's not so dangerous any more. Tris chose to become one of the brand new leaders of Dauntless, along with Will, Tori, Harrison and Zeke. I know the whole faction wishes that Four could have been one of the five, though. I was actually also nominated, but declined. I've had enough conflict and I know that those we have running our faction now will be honest, fair and ethical. Instead, I chose to use my artistic talent to become a tattoo artist as I have always wanted to be. I am training under Tori and really enjoy my work.

Tris and I have moved into an apartment together. Everything has been going great with us. We both are plagued nightmares from the night of the simulation, but we are there to calm each other when the nightmares come. Zeke and Shauna are beginning to get more back into normal routines after having a difficult time handling Four's death. For the first week, Zeke hardly left his apartment- Four really was another brother to him. But Zeke is resilient, and he's bouncing back; Shauna is too.

Mom and Dad are together again, too. Dad did have to go back to wherever he had been living for the past decade and 'work some details out', and he said that he will tell me someday about what is outside the fence. It drives Tris crazy. She's so curious, she can't stand not knowing.

Life is getting back to normal. Well, as normal as it can be a month after our leaders used us to perform genocide, and after losing someone we all cared about. So tonight, a group of about twenty of us are going out to play capture the flag, and it feels good to do something that is so fun and just… _normal._

We all hop on the moving train. Zeke and I stand at the front of the group: we're both captains. Tonight is the battle of the Pedrad boys.

"You can go first, Zeke," I suggest. He chooses Shauna. Predictable- though no more predictable than what I am about to do.

Before making my first pick, I think back to our game of capture the flag during initiation and smirk as I say, "I'll take the Stiff."

A few of our friends smile sadly, and Zeke catches on. "Picking the weak ones so you'll have an excuse when you lose?"

I laugh and kiss Tris's temple. "Something like that."

Half an hour later, while the rest of our team executes a plan they concocted to scout out Zeke's flag before we divide and conquer much like we did in our last game, Tris and I climb up to the platform on the Ferris wheel. We sit together in our spot halfway up the wheel, wrapped up in each other. "I really miss him," Tris whispers. At first, she had been hesitant to talk with me about her grief over her friend, but a good heart-to-heart talk cleared the air. He wasn't a threat to me, and she had chosen me, we had all cleared the air before he died. It has in many ways been harder on me than her or even Zeke, as he literally died saving my life. I guess that's what they call survivor's guilt.

"I know, Babe," I whisper. "We all do. He was my family. And he was the only piece of home you had at Dauntless. It's okay to be sad."

She sighs. "It's not all sad, though. Times like tonight, we get to remember, then he's never really gone."

After a few minutes of silence, I take her chin in my hand and turn it toward me. "I love you," I murmur as I press my lips against hers. The kiss starts out slow and gentle, and as it goes on becomes passionate and so full of love.

When we break away, Tris smiles slightly. "Come on, Amity," she says, "let's get back down there and steal your pansycake brother's flag so you can take me home.

"Uh, yeah, I'll meet you down there in a minute." I'm really wishing right now that we had just stayed home in the first place.

Tris smirks and shakes her head, and as I watch her climb down and in the distance can see my friends sneaking through the trees having a blast with this game, I smile a little. It was all worth it. This life is what we fought for, and we made it count.

* * *

 ** _A/N: There it is! I hope you enjoyed my first fanfic... I just wanted to thank everyone who favorited, followed, and especially those who reviewed. You have no idea how encouraging it is (unless you write too, maybe!) and I swear, I could easily rival Tris on the insecurity front, so reviews really help keep me going. I have several other story ideas and am starting to plot a new one, and also have another story about half-done that is published here called Reawakening. If you're interested please go check it out and/or follow me if you want to receive an alert when I begin to publish the next story I'm planning. Thank you all again! xoxo_**


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